Chapter 288
Chapter 288
He didn’t mind becoming Sun Wukong. It just meant hitting people with a staff.
But covering his whole body in fur? Wasn’t that going too far?
Remembering the voice he had just heard, Chuunibyou gave a long sigh.
“I hate monkeys. And bald monks.”
Their lucky star rubbed his gleaming scalp. “Call me a bald monk again, and I’ll send you to a circus.”
“Will you two stop arguing? At least you still look somewhat human. What about me? What about me?”
As a schoolteacher, Kong Hanchi really shouldn’t have become so agitated.
But all he had to do was look down to see that enormous round belly. He even had a pig’s snout.
It took no brains at all to work out that he was the group’s Zhu Bajie.
After a moment’s silence, their lucky star shook out his kasaya.
“Aren’t we missing someone?”
“No. I’m here.”
A hoarse voice came from nearby.
In the sunlight, another bald figure slowly approached from the riverbank.
“This change of sex is going to take some getting used to.”
The English teacher had never imagined she would become a man one day, much less the famous Monk Sha.
Their lucky star took a sip from his flask to moisten his throat. His expression grew serious as he studied the city walls ahead.
“My mission is to get the travel permit and escape the Kingdom of Women.”
Chuunibyou scratched his head. “Mine is to escort the bald monk.”
“Same. I have to escort the bald monk too.”
The English teacher sighed. “Why is mine to deliver all the luggage intact beyond the Kingdom of Women?”
They exchanged looks. Their lucky star was the first to give an order.
“Let’s go. Our opponents are probably inside.”
Leading the white horse, he set off ahead of them.
As the four approached the wall, he pressed his palms together with an air of devotion.
“This humble monk is Tang Sanzang, from the Great Tang in the Eastern Lands. I journey west to seek the true scriptures. Please grant us passage.”
This was the Kingdom of Women. Naturally, the guards were women too.
Looking at those valiant beauties, Kong Hanchi suddenly wondered whether the mission could wait.
“Men?”
“You don’t see those often!”
“The Great Tang?”
“Never heard of it. Must be far away.”
The voices on the wall weren’t loud, but the group could hear them clearly.
Their lucky star was about to repeat himself when a sharp pain struck his abdomen.
His brain froze for a fraction of a second, then caught up instantly.
Motherfucker! The Mother-and-Child River!
He glanced at his flask, then turned a furious gaze on the English teacher.
She had handed it to him. In other words, while she was missing earlier, this treacherous disciple had been plotting against him!
“Tell me! Are you a spy?”
Holding the Demon-Subduing Staff, the English teacher quietly backed away two steps.
“I’m not. I forgot about the Mother-and-Child River.”
She really hadn’t remembered that part of the story.
She had appeared beside the river with an empty flask in her hand.
Wouldn’t any normal person fill it before coming back?
To repeat an earlier point: a certain inhuman individual was another matter.
After a brief discussion on the wall, the guards decided to escort this circus troupe to the palace for an audience.
Whatever else, they were envoys from another country.
Basic diplomatic courtesies still had to be observed.
Two guards came down from the wall, only to find a scene that left them utterly bewildered.
“Master, would you prefer a boy or a girl?”
“Have a girl! A sweet little daughter to warm your heart!”
“Exactly. Giving birth is such a rare experience. Treasure it!”
Under the barrage of remarks, their lucky star, already in agonizing abdominal pain, lay down on the ground.
Fuck this. Whoever wanted those damned scriptures could fetch them. He was giving up!
Did those three disciples even sound human?
“Did you drink from the Mother-and-Child River?”
The voice beside him sounded like salvation.
“Yes!”
“If you really don’t want the child, you can go to Jieyang Mountain. There’s water there that will end the pregnancy.”
He followed the guard’s pointing finger. A small mountain was faintly visible.
“Wukong, save your master!”
Chuunibyou looked at their lucky star’s swelling belly and fell silent for a moment.
“First, my mission is to keep you alive. Childbirth isn’t covered. Second…”
He paused, a rare gleam of excitement appearing in his eyes.
“I want to see how a man gives birth too!”
Unable to rely on his eldest disciple, their lucky star turned to his second.
One look at the pig-brained teammate flirting with the two guards made him turn away immediately.
“Wujing…”
“I only carry the luggage. I don’t know, I’m not getting involved, and I’m no good at fighting.”
That triple refusal sealed off every escape route.
The guard beside them was utterly baffled.
How had this circus troupe survived until now?
How had they come so far without being eaten by demons?
“Well, would you like to come inside and meet the sovereign first?”
At that, their lucky star stood straight up. “Thank you, miss!”
He really was pregnant, but it didn’t hurt as much as one might imagine.
For now, at least, his belly was merely swollen. The actual birth was still several days away.
The four followed the guards slowly into the city.
Their lucky star tried to work out how to persuade Chuunibyou to fetch the water, ignoring every woman who looked at him along the way.
Chuunibyou kept his head down, silently reviewing the new abilities that had appeared in his mind.
The English teacher was still a woman underneath it all and had no particular interest.
Only Kong Hanchi, their old pig, kept swallowing as he surveyed the women everywhere.
In any dynasty, in any country, the palace represented the nation’s dignity.
At the sight of the magnificent hall, their lucky star straightened and quietly shook out his kasaya.
“Summon the envoy of the Great Tang, Tang Sanzang!”
A clear voice rang out. He took a deep breath and led his disciples into the hall.
“Greetings, Your Majesty!”
“I hear you’ve drunk from the Mother-and-Child River?”
Qingqing looked at the bald monk before her, her eyes full of amusement.
According to the proper Journey to the West, she should try to seduce Monk Tang into staying.
But Qingqing knew perfectly well that this was a competitive game.
Seduction would be useless.
“Yes. Might Your Majesty provide us with some water to end the pregnancy?”
“I’m sorry, but I don’t have any either. You’ll have to stay here and fetch it yourselves.”
He sighed. “Then you have my thanks, Your Majesty.”
“Attend us! Take the holy monk to rest!”
“Yes, Your Majesty!”
A little over ten minutes later, they were shown to a side hall to rest.
The English teacher frowned toward the outside.
“Is that sovereign really a player?”
Kong Hanchi gave a rueful laugh. “Hard to tell. She acted completely normally.”
“Hey, hey! Get me that water first. I have a feeling there’s going to be a fight tonight.”
Chuunibyou scratched his head. “What about your safety while I’m gone?”
“It’s fine. Just be back by tonight.”