Chapter 285

Chapter 285

Li Yang sighed, silently picked up the human head beside him, and began eating its brains.

He really was hopelessly clueless about women. Even knowing why Gu Yue was angry, he had no idea where to begin making it up to her.

Worse, a worry buried deep inside him was gradually surfacing.

That worry was also why he still hadn’t explained what was going on with the little girl.

The lunch break passed in a flash. The scene Zhang Bei and the two old men had been waiting for never materialized.

Something else full of potential amusement, however, drew Zhang Bei’s attention.

More than a dozen middle-aged men, some bald and others balding, had appeared at the amusement park in a line.

A normal person would first wonder who these people were.

Then they might wonder why they had come to the Amusement Park.

But our Boss Zhang’s unusual mind always focused on the strangest things.

Why had these people lost so much hair?

A baldness support group?

He studied the group in puzzlement.

More precisely, he studied their less-than-luxuriant hair.

Only when they stopped Professor Wei with gifts in hand was his confusion resolved.

Qi Tang placed a neatly wrapped medical book in Professor Wei’s hands.

“It’s been a long time!”

Professor Wei cast an anxious glance toward Werewolf nearby.

What a waste of time!

Still, these people counted as his disciples and their disciples.

Brushing them off completely would damage his image as a venerable professor.

After a brief moment’s thought, he quickly found a solution.

“I’ve heard about your achievements. Well done. Keep it up. Speak to our boss if you need anything. I have work to do.”

He spoke at lightning speed. Within seconds, he was already in position outside Werewolf.

Qi Tang stood rooted to the spot, utterly bewildered.

Well done?

Achievements?

Hadn’t he just been doing his shifts and seeing patients these past few years?

Did that count as an achievement?

Had Meng Chuan witnessed this familiar scene, he would have known exactly where Professor Wei had learned that routine.

Every time he tried to report on his work, Boss Zhang shut him down with similar words.

Of course, Meng Chuan had evolved by now.

More precisely, his thinking had reached a new plane.

Rule Three for Dealing with Boss Zhang: Whatever he says must not affect your judgment, much less stop you from proceeding with your work.

Rule Four for Dealing with Boss Zhang: When he tries to beguile you with words, treat it as a fly farting. Otherwise, you will suffer unimaginable mental contamination.

Where there was oppression, there was resistance.

To resist Boss Zhang, Meng Chuan had compiled ten rules of engagement.

And the list was still growing.

A faint smile appeared as Zhang Bei looked at the middle-aged men.

They knew Professor Wei, and they had come as a group.

That proved one thing: they were among those forced to experience the attractions.

Delighted, Boss Zhang picked up his radio.

“Professor Wei has friends visiting. Show them our hospitality.”

“Yes, Boss!”

An unoccupied employee promptly answered.

And so the middle-aged men’s fate was sealed.

Zhang Bei had always refused to admit there was anything wrong with his hospitality.

Everyone else knew perfectly well that being warmly welcomed by Boss Zhang here never ended well.

While Qi Tang was still wondering which of his achievements had caught Professor Wei’s attention, an employee quietly approached.

“Hello. I work here. The boss asked me to show you around the attractions.”

Qi Tang finally emerged from his tangled thoughts.

He rubbed his sun-reflecting scalp. “Hello!”

The employee had no intention of wasting a moment of precious time.

The sooner these people were aboard, the sooner the employee could sit in the control room and enjoy their screams.

They might be busy all day, but apart from the doctors, most of the staff thoroughly enjoyed their work.

Especially since every console had a red button.

That thing was a wellspring of joy.

Once, they too had been upright young people standing proudly beneath the red flag.

Now, under Zhang Bei’s corrupting influence, they were gradually losing their original selves.

The dragon slayers had become dragons. Their hearts were now like Zhang Bei’s: cut them open, and they would surely be black.

After watching the balding internists board the Roller Coaster, Zhang Bei turned toward someone approaching him.

“Boss Zhang, long time no see.”

Zhang Bei sighed at the visibly thinner Ding Ye. “What happened to you?”

Ding Ye gave a weary laugh. “I’ve been looking after my father-in-law in the hospital.”

Zhang Bei remembered at once.

Wasn’t his father-in-law Director Qi?

That explained why he hadn’t seen Qingqing’s close friend lately either.

“Here to unwind?”

“Yes. Too much stress. I brought you a gift as well.”

Zhang Bei’s wariness instantly shot to its peak.

Visitors had brought him gifts before. Quite a few, in fact.

Whether those gifts were entirely respectable was another question.

Dead rats and razor blades were child’s play.

His endlessly inventive visitors had sent snakes, southern cockroaches, and even socks left unwashed for months.

Gifts, after all, usually expressed the sender’s feelings.

Using the phone numbers and addresses provided, Boss Zhang had returned the favor with Roller Coaster ticket packages.

Ding Ye naturally understood the reason for his wary look.

“You’re always sitting around drinking tea, so I got you a little something to roll around in your hand.”

At that, Zhang Bei finally relaxed. “Prayer beads or a bracelet?”

“Neither.”

Ding Ye unzipped his backpack and took out a glass jar.

Zhang Bei stared at its contents in silence for a long time.

“You want me to handle that?”

“Of course. Look how smooth it is. I specifically picked one that can survive out of water.”

Zhang Bei gazed at the jar on the table, caught between bewilderment and disbelief.

The thing inside even made him wonder whether the problem lay with him or with the world.

What normal person sat around polishing a turtle in their hand?

Yes, Ding Ye had brought him a palm-sized turtle.

It appeared to be a golden coin turtle, and a fairly docile one at that.

But picturing himself sitting in a chair with a teacup in one hand and a turtle in the other, he couldn’t help finding the image rather strange.

“Gift delivered. I’m off to find something to play.”

Ding Ye turned and left without the slightest reluctance.

After all, the man in front of him was Boss Zhang. Boss Zhang, who could scare children into tears!

Zhang Bei pondered the jar for a long time. In the end, temptation won, and he picked up the turtle.

He ran a finger along its shell’s markings. Actually, it felt rather nice.

Boss Zhang’s adaptability really was beyond imagination.

Once the initial awkwardness passed, he began handling the turtle with perfect equanimity.

The slightly rough ridges grew smoother and smoother as time went by.

A head emerged from the hard shell, glanced at the large hand stroking it, then silently withdrew again.

Life was hard. The turtle sighed.

Zhang Bei’s pleasure in petting it didn’t last long before another creature jumped onto his lap, demanding attention.

Zhongwu stretched his increasingly plump body against him.

The cat had grown completely accustomed to life at the Amusement Park.

His daily routine consisted of riding around on Digua, acting cute and begging affection from visitors together.

Birds of a feather flocked together. This scoundrel of a cat wasn’t much different from his blackhearted owner.

After receiving food, Digua would at least play a few games with the visitors.

The wretched cat became aloof the moment the food was his.

Zhang Bei adjusted Zhongwu’s position. Man, cat, and turtle basked in the afternoon sun.

On the Roller Coaster nearby, the internists had no idea what awaited them.

Qi Tang narrowed his eyes as the fully occupied train slowly began to move.

More than a dozen of them had come. Only he had even a vague idea of how terrifying this place was.

“Old Qi, why the long face?”

“You don’t understand.”

“It’s not that fast. Unless you’re scared of heights, what’s so frightening?”

“Piss off. If you can’t take it later, try shutting your eyes.”

Qi Tang’s face was grave. A little advice was all he could offer his colleagues.

A closer look would have revealed his fingers turning faintly white around the safety belt.

This damned place didn’t even provide handholds. Gripping the belt offered his only scrap of reassurance.

As the Roller Coaster moved along, the conversation around him grew livelier.

Qi Tang sighed at the slope towering into the clouds ahead.

The inevitable had arrived. These people still didn’t understand why the surgeons resented Wu so much.

He could only hope that after today, they would still have the courage to face the monthly challenges to come.

Slowly, the Roller Coaster reached the summit of that despair-inducing slope.

The conversation died away.

“O-Old Qi… wh-what’s going on?”

The trembling voice conveyed its owner’s terror perfectly.

Qi Tang pressed himself tightly into his seat, unable to hide the panic in his eyes.

“Don’t ask me. It’s my first time too.”

He had only heard how frightening it was. This was his first personal experience.

Worse, Boss Zhang had arranged for them to begin with something as extreme as the Roller Coaster.

A hundred meters above the ground, the train swayed.

The internists could no longer control their racing hearts.

Even Qi Tang, who had prepared himself mentally, was helpless against the waves of dizziness.

At last, amid cries of alarm, the Roller Coaster plunged downward.

Qi Tang had an excellent seat, right in the second row.

At an ordinary amusement park, it would have been ideal for both the view and the ride.

But this was Zhang Bei’s Amusement Park!

This was the Roller Coaster visitors called “Despair Evolved”!

Qi Tang’s gaze locked onto the broken track almost instantly.

“Wu, you bleeping bleep! Bleep, bleep, bleep!”

He was so loud that even the other screams paused for a moment.

Zhang Bei stopped stroking his turtle and searched the nearby area.

They were only trying an attraction. Why had someone already cracked?

Zhang “Utterly Clueless” Bei couldn’t understand what Qi Tang was going through.

Before coming, Qi Tang had worked hard to prepare himself psychologically.

He might not have been completely ready, but he had reached at least eighty percent.

In the end, all that effort came to nothing before the broken track.

When you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes into you.

The saying fit this moment perfectly.

Whether Qi Tang liked it or not, the gap in the track drew closer and closer.

His face grew paler and paler.

Finally, the plunging train reached the break.

But the vertical drop he expected never came.

He and half the riders were left hanging upside down in midair, swinging back and forth with their momentum.

His already terrified mind shattered completely.

Language that could have gotten someone arrested rang across the sky.

Much of it centered on a certain Wu.

The fierce shouting didn’t last long. A click sounded.

Under gravity’s pull, half the Roller Coaster plunged toward the ground.

Through his blurring vision, Qi Tang thought he saw a glowing figure.

Golden light covered its body as it sat upon a lotus pedestal.

Had the Buddha come for him?

Qi Tang strained his eyes wide, trying to see the Buddha’s true face.

Who could have imagined that it was Wu’s face?

A surge of rage tightened his chest. He let out a furious roar, then closed his eyes.

Once the stream of abuse involving everyone’s mothers fell silent overhead, Zhang Bei finally stopped paying attention.

He turned to Ding Ye, standing in front of him.

“Why are you here instead of on a ride?”

Ding Ye glanced toward Werewolf.

“They won’t finish for a while. I came over for a chat.”

“What about?”

Fortunately, Ding Ye was familiar with Zhang Bei’s manner of speaking. Otherwise, that one sentence could have ended the conversation.

“What kind of girl do you like, Boss Zhang?”

Zhang Bei considered it carefully. “Eight out of ten for looks, eight out of ten for figure, and at least seventy percent of my fighting ability.”

Ding Ye was silent for a long time.

The first two conditions were attainable enough.

But fighting ability?

Seventy percent of his strength hardly fell within the human range, did it?

“Leaving looks and figure aside, what do you think of Qingqing?”

Zhang Bei stared at him as if he were joking.

“Sorry, I can’t leave those aside. Besides, I’m not into men.”

In truth, Qingqing certainly qualified as a beauty.

But in both temperament and intelligence, Zhang Bei had always regarded her as one of his buddies.

Ding Ye considered Qingqing’s personality and shuddered.

“Are you trying to set me up with someone?”

At Zhang Bei’s question, Ding Ye hurriedly shook his head.

“No! I’m not! Don’t say that!”

Set someone up with Zhang Bei?

Wouldn’t that be pure sabotage?

Take it a little more seriously, and even a bolt of lightning striking him out of a clear sky would hardly be surprising.