Chapter 178
Chapter 178
Wang Yuanyou sat beside the window, bouncing one leg impatiently.
Why was Yun Youyou not here yet?
Even if she had crawled the whole way, she should have arrived by now.
“Sir, the French-style lamb chops you ordered…”
The waiter, dressed in a black vest, carried the plate toward the table, then stopped with it suspended in midair.
Wang Yuanyou waited, but the roasted lamb chops never came down.
What was wrong with this waiter?
How could someone zone out in the middle of serving a dish?
Wang Yuanyou raised his head impatiently and discovered the waiter staring openmouthed at something in the distance.
Even Miss Li had put down her knife and fork in shock.
Wang Yuanyou: “?”
What was everyone staring at? Had Yun Youyou arrived?
Could she have dressed so beautifully today that she had stunned the whole restaurant?
Joy leaped in Wang Yuanyou’s heart.
That was Youyou for you. Always reliable!
He turned around full of anticipation, and his smile froze on his lips.
An unidentified object in a full-body Ultraman suit was approaching one heavy step at a time.
Wang Yuanyou: “!!!”
Don’t come to me! Don’t come to me!
His prayers were doomed to fail.
The Ultraman stopped beside Wang Yuanyou’s table.
The waiter retreated several steps in fright, making room for her.
Miss Li looked uncertainly at Wang Yuanyou. “This is your girlfriend?”
Wang Yuanyou was even more shocked than she was.
Who am I? Where am I?
The Ultraman struck a classic pose and announced in a ringing voice, “Greetings. I am the Mother of Ultraman from Planet M3829. You may also call me Fuck Your Mom.”
Miss Li: “…Hello, Fuck Your… Mom.”
Wang Yuanyou remained frozen.
The Ultraman turned to Miss Li. “Do you believe in the light?”
Miss Li pursed her lips, unsure how anyone could possibly answer. “Should I… believe?”
The Ultraman comforted her.
“Don’t be afraid. I may come from another planet, but I am an emissary of justice.”
With that, she drew a laser sword from behind her back.
The Ultraman pointed it at Wang Yuanyou.
“I hereby arrest you for the crimes of narcissism, going on blind dates, and talking too much.”
Wang Yuanyou’s mind had been blank throughout the entire performance.
Only when he heard the charges did he finally recover.
“How do I talk too much? You’re making up crimes!”
The Ultraman ignored his protest. “You’re talking too much.”
Then she produced a pair of silver handcuffs from nowhere.
With a crisp click, Wang Yuanyou was cuffed.
The Ultraman pressed the laser sword to his back and ordered, “Move.”
Miss Li remained seated, questioning every life choice that had led her here.
Before leaving, the Ultraman’s attention landed on the fragrant roasted lamb chops.
She addressed Miss Li with complete seriousness. “Because I come from another planet, my stomach is connected to a black hole. If you feed me a little, I can perform the Ultraman Dance for you.”
The Ultraman pressed a button on the laser sword.
Colorful lights immediately flashed along the blade as music burst out. “Love, like fire, warmed me…”
Wang Yuanyou: “…”
Only Yun Youyou could pull off something like this!
Miss Li: “…Take all of it. The dance won’t be necessary.”
The Ultraman turned to the waiter. “Please bring me a takeout box.”
The waiter sprinted away and returned with a container, then helped Yun Youyou pack the food.
When he first took this job, he had never imagined that one day he would be packing a meal for an Ultraman.
The Ultraman accepted the takeout box and politely said, “Thank you for the meal.”
The waiter and Miss Li watched helplessly as the Ultraman marched Wang Yuanyou out of the restaurant.
Even after the pair left, customers inside craned their necks to stare after them.
The moment Yun Youyou climbed into the car, she tore off the helmet.
The thing was unbearably stuffy.
Wang Yuanyou looked at her, at a complete loss for words.
“Didn’t I ask you to pretend to be my girlfriend?”
By tomorrow, everyone would undoubtedly know that Wang Yuanyou had been abducted by an Ultraman.
The heat had flushed Yun Youyou’s delicate face red, and damp strands of hair clung to her skin.
She fanned herself with one hand and said with complete seriousness, “You can keep up an act for a while, but not forever. When I go back to work at the Game, how are you going to explain things to your mother? If we break up right after getting together, she might arrange even more blind dates for you.”
Yun Youyou’s reasoning did, admittedly, make some sense.
“Besides, don’t you think getting abducted by an Ultraman is incredibly cool?”
Wang Yuanyou quickly accepted this bizarre logic.
“You’re right. It’s awesome!”
He waved Yun Youyou over. “Put the helmet back on. Let’s take a picture.”
Yun Youyou had no choice but to wear it again.
Ji Lin ignored them and concentrated on driving.
They were still taking pictures when the car pulled up in front of the villa.
As soon as it stopped, Wang Yuanyou called to Ji Lin.
“Take one for us. This pose doesn’t work as a selfie.”
Ji Lin thought he was unbelievably troublesome, but accepted the phone anyway.
Yun Youyou pinned Wang Yuanyou’s arm with heroic flair and struck a pose as though subduing an enemy.
Wang Yuanyou’s expression was perfectly calibrated: three parts pain, five parts remorse, and a final touch of helplessness.
Looking at the pair made Ji Lin’s eyes ache. He snapped a few pictures at random.
Wang Yuanyou and Yun Youyou immediately crowded around to inspect them.
“Not bad. Perfect for Moments.”
Wang Yuanyou began editing the post at once.
A few minutes later, Yun Youyou saw the freshly published update and became the first person to like it.
Wang Yuanyou had posted a photo of his abduction with the caption: “Arrested by an alien for causing a drowning. My crime: my charms were so powerful that someone fell straight into the river of love.”
Yun Youyou commented: “One sentence from you and global oil prices just crashed.”
Wang Yuanyou: “…”
He raised his head indignantly. “You don’t understand my irresistible charm.”
Yun Youyou said, “This Sis doesn’t understand. You do.”
Wang Yuanyou was about to argue when he suddenly remembered he had another blind date soon.
He immediately sidled up to Yun Youyou with eager courtesy.
“Youyou, I’ll need you to save me again later.”
Seated on the sofa, Yun Youyou stared at him in surprise.
“How terrified is your mother that you won’t find a wife? How many blind dates has she arranged?”
Wang Yuanyou had grievances enough to fill an ocean.
“Who knows? Why doesn’t Ji Lin’s mother arrange any for him? His situation looks even more hopeless than mine.”
Yun Youyou examined both men and offered Wang Yuanyou an objective suggestion.
“Maybe you should look in a mirror first.”
On his own, Wang Yuanyou was handsome. Standing beside Ji Lin, however, he could only be called pleasant-looking.
And he followed Ji Lin around every day. No wonder his mother was so anxious.
Wang Yuanyou leaped three feet into the air.
“What? Are you saying Ji Lin is more handsome than me?”
Then he caught sight of Ji Lin emerging from the kitchen and immediately changed his tune.
“You’re right. Ji Lin is absolutely more handsome!”