Chapter 94

Chapter 94

The little color Madam Gu had in her face gradually drained away.

This was yet another blow after the Ji Family’s downfall and the loss of her husband.

Her only daughter was her sole remaining concern. She had always believed that Hanyi would live a good life in the end. She had even felt fortunate that the Master had agreed to that marriage back then, allowing Ji Hanyi to marry into a fine household like the Xie Family even after disaster befell the Ji Family.

At the very least, her daughter would be able to spend the rest of her life in wealth and comfort. At the very least, her daughter would one day become the lady in charge of the Xie Family and lead a glorious, respectable life — one far better than her own.

But now, that did not seem to be the case.

Her daughter did not seem to have lived well in the Xie Family at all.

Divorced women were all but unheard of among the noble families of the capital.

Madam Gu stared blankly ahead as tears slowly spilled from her eyes.

She did not even know what to say. Should she blame her daughter? This was the precious girl she had raised with every care since childhood. She could not bear to do so.

And yet, she could not help feeling that her daughter had let her down.

The conflicting emotions twisted together, leaving her chest aching and stifled. She felt that even if she died now, she would still have failed her husband.

She had once meant to follow him in death, but she had gone on living, treading carefully in her eldest sister-in-law’s residence, all so she could see her daughter live a smooth and happy life.

But now her daughter was telling her that she had already divorced.

Madam Gu clutched her chest. She could not utter a single word. Her vision gradually blurred, then abruptly went black.

Ji Hanyi watched helplessly as her mother fainted in front of her. Her face went pale with fright, and she rushed forward to catch her, calling for Rongchun to fetch a physician at once.

Rongchun was startled as well and stumbled out in a panic.

In the empty room, Ji Hanyi felt as though she could barely breathe. She lowered her head and buried her face against her mother’s chest, no longer certain whether the choice she had insisted on making was right or wrong. She knew better than anyone what her mother’s greatest wish had been.

She knew better than anyone what her mother wanted to see.

If she had endured it all, she could have maintained a respectable facade before the world and brought everything to a dignified end in the eyes of both outsiders and her mother.

Yet in the end, she had selfishly chosen herself just once.

Her delicate frame lay curled against her mother’s chest, her back trembling faintly as her plain clothes bunched into wrinkles.

When the physician hurried over and took Madam Gu’s pulse, his expression immediately turned grave.

He frowned and stroked his beard before looking at Ji Hanyi with a sigh. “Madam’s pulse is exceptionally faint and slightly irregular. It is clearly the pulse of illness. On top of that, the emotional shock has struck at her heart, so I fear her condition has worsened. I can only prescribe medicine to replenish her strength and fortify her health.”

He looked at Ji Hanyi again. “This illness cannot be cured in a day or two. Madam’s constitution was already poor, and her worries have festered into sickness. She can only recover slowly.”

With that, the physician turned and left the room, instructing the young apprentice beside him to prepare paper and ink so he could write the prescription.

After seeing the physician out, Ji Hanyi remained seated in the chair beside her mother. Rongchun brought the prescription inside. Ji Hanyi’s eyes were still rimmed red, and when she lowered her gaze to the paper, she could barely make out the writing. She pressed a handkerchief to her eyes for a long while before the tear-soaked blur finally cleared a little.

By then, First Madam Gu and Second Madam had heard what had happened and hurried over. Before they even passed through the curtain, First Madam Gu’s voice carried into the room.

“I knew this would happen. She refused to enjoy the perfectly good life she had in the Xie Family and insisted on making a fuss about divorce. They even came to our door bearing gifts, yet she still had to put on airs and cause trouble.

“Now she’s thrown the entire household into turmoil, and she’s even angered her mother into fainting. What are we supposed to do? Does she think physicians and medicine don’t cost silver? Does silver fall from the sky? In the end, it’ll be the Gu Family left supporting her again.

“She ought to take a good look at her situation. Does she think this is some game — or something to be proud of?”

As the final word fell, Madam Zhang lifted the curtain and entered. Her gaze immediately landed on Ji Hanyi, who sat by the bed with reddened eyes.

Still frowning, she summoned a maid and asked what the physician had said. Once she had heard the report, she went to check on Madam Gu, who was still unconscious on the bed.

Second Madam Gu, Madam Liu, went over to Ji Hanyi instead. Ji Hanyi sat leaning to one side, dressed in plain clothes, her fair, unadorned face wet with tears. She looked so delicate and untouched that anyone could easily have believed she had never married at all.

Nearby, Madam Sun had been about to offer her comfort, but the sight of Ji Hanyi’s tear-streaked beauty made her falter.

Madam Sun gently laid a hand on Ji Hanyi’s shoulder and said softly, “Don’t be too upset. Since the matter has already been settled, your mother would have found out sooner or later.”

Ji Hanyi raised her eyes to Madam Sun. At that moment, she felt lost and utterly alone, like a leaf drifting through wind and rain with no shore on which to land.

She could no longer tell whether what she had done was right or wrong.

As she looked up, a tear slowly slid from the corner of her eye. In a hoarse voice, she asked, “Aunt, was I wrong?”

That single upward glance nearly left Madam Sun, a woman herself, spellbound.

The tears on Ji Hanyi’s fair, dewy face glittered crystal clear in the light. Her beautiful eyes gazed upward, her long lashes trembling, making her appear terribly fragile.

Madam Sun no longer held much prejudice against Ji Hanyi. She had also learned from Old Madam that it was Ji Hanyi’s plea to the Shen Family that had secured Gu Xun’s release.

No matter what, although her own Master had died on the road after being implicated by Ji Hanyi’s father, when it came down to it, what fault did Ji Hanyi herself bear for any of those old grievances?
Though all the resentment and grief in her heart had needed someone to fall upon, Ji Hanyi was Ji Jing’s only daughter, so Madam Liu had inevitably treated her coldly in the past. But now that Ji Hanyi had ended up in such a situation, none of her relatives could truly be happy about it.

She consoled her in a low voice. “It’s hard to say who was right or wrong, and it’s too late to talk about that now. You’ve already made your choice, and there’s no turning back. Don’t dwell on it too much.”

Ji Hanyi understood everything, especially that there was no road back. She had only wanted to believe that at least someone beside her understood her.

But now she realized she had always been alone. Why should she need anyone else’s understanding?

After checking on Madam Gu, Madam Zhang asked about the medicine being prepared. She then instructed the maids in the room to take good care of her before turning to Ji Hanyi. “You knew your mother was in poor health, yet you insisted on doing this. Are you satisfied now?”

“I won’t clean up this mess for you. However things turn out in the end, you will have brought it upon yourself.”

As she reached the curtain, she added, “This matter has even alarmed Old Madam. She’s still waiting anxiously for news. She’s advanced in years and in poor health herself, yet she still has to worry about all this.”

“I still have to report back to Old Madam. You’ll have to handle things here yourself. There’s nothing more I can do.”

With that, Madam Zhang lifted the curtain and walked out.

Once Madam Zhang was gone and her voice had faded, the room fell silent.

Madam Gu remained unconscious. Ji Hanyi sat motionless in her chair for a long while, while every maid in the room hung her head in dejection.

Madam Liu felt there was nothing more she could say by remaining there. With a sigh, she offered Ji Hanyi a few more words of comfort before leaving as well.

Once outside, she glanced back at what had once been the glorious Huilan Courtyard and remembered the days when Madam Gu had married.

Ji Jing had already been serving at the Court of Judicial Review then. He was extraordinarily beautiful. Though he was a man, beautiful was the most fitting word to describe him. He resembled a richly painted landscape, with an air of lofty pride — strong brows, long eyes, and looks beyond compare.

In truth, Ji Jing had not been particularly young even then. He was twenty-five or twenty-six, yet countless noble young ladies wished to marry him. There had even been rumors that a daughter of the Shen Family had harbored such intentions. Whether those rumors were true, no one knew, but Ji Jing had certainly been one of the most sought-after men at the time.

Madam Gu had only just come of age. It was said that Ji Jing had caught a glimpse of her while she was out admiring flowers, and the two had fallen in love at first sight. Before long, Ji Jing came to propose marriage.

It had been a match that delighted everyone. One was the rising, favored disciple of the Chief Grand Secretary, while the other was a pure and delicate magnolia sheltered in the inner chambers. The Gu Family was naturally overjoyed. Though both of Ji Jing’s parents had passed away and his family was merely an obscure household from a county near Jinling, none of that mattered. In fact, because Ji Jing had no parents, Madam Gu would have a truly peaceful inner household after marrying him. Even Madam Liu had sincerely envied Madam Gu for finding such an excellent husband.

How glorious Huilan Courtyard had been in those days. Everyone sought to curry favor with Madam Gu, and those hoping to forge a connection with the Former Chief Grand Secretary came flocking to ingratiate themselves with her. When Madam Gu married, her dowry was the richest of them all. Old Madam Gu had nearly emptied her entire nest egg for Madam Gu, and every relative in the family had competed to add gifts to her dowry.

Yet now, every last piece of that dowry had been confiscated. Not a single thing had been recovered.

After Madam Gu married Ji Jing, his official career flourished as he rose steadily through the ranks. By the age of forty, he had already become the Minister of War. Given a few more years, who knew what heights he might have reached?

Old Madam had also been exceptionally pleased, for the Gu Family had reaped many benefits from the marriage. Although Madam Gu only stayed in Huilan Courtyard for a day or two whenever she brought Ji Hanyi back to visit her mother, the maids cleaned it every day. Even when no one was staying there, it had to remain spotless, as though it were still occupied.

Yet in only a few short years, Huilan Courtyard had become bleak and worn. All its former splendor had vanished, like a hall left empty after the final song.

Inside, Ji Hanyi remained seated in her chair. Resting her head on one hand, she stared at the charcoal fire by her feet. The moisture in her eyes gradually dried. A faint wind whispered beyond the window, carrying the distant chime of bells. She held her mother’s hand beside the bed, and in the silence, her panicked heart slowly settled.

She thought that everything would surely get better.

By afternoon, Madam Gu still had not awakened. Old Madam Gu came to visit and found Ji Hanyi feeding Madam Gu her medicine. Ji Hanyi sat beside the bed, patient and meticulous, giving it to her one spoonful at a time without the slightest trace of impatience.

Seeing her once most-beloved daughter in such a state pained Old Madam Gu deeply. She seemed to have aged yet again. Much of her hair had turned white after the Ji Family’s downfall, and now hardly a black strand remained.

An older maid hurriedly brought over a chair. Old Madam Gu sat beside the bed and offered Ji Hanyi a few words of comfort before saying, “When your mother wakes, send someone to fetch me. I’ll speak with her.”

“Your mother has always been prone to backing herself into a corner. Once she gets stuck on something, she can’t find her way out. It was the same when your father died. You hadn’t even come of age then, but she disregarded everything. She didn’t even care that her death might ruin your marriage prospects. She swallowed arsenic, determined to follow your father in death.”

“She still hasn’t found her way out of that dead end, even now. Don’t blame yourself, Girl Yi. This isn’t your fault. Your grandmother is here.”

“I’ll talk to her.”