Chapter 34

Chapter 34

The old maidservant was startled again, but she answered truthfully. “Young Madam didn’t say anything when she returned that day. As soon as she came back, she crouched by the charcoal brazier to warm her hands. I saw the flames touching her palms, yet Young Madam didn’t seem to feel the heat at all.”

“Rongchun called a physician that day. He said Young Madam’s cold was so severe it had nearly cost her life.”

“Young Madam coughed all night. Even we servants felt terrible listening to her.”

Xie Yuheng closed his eyes. He remembered that night.

He had accused her the moment he returned. He had clearly seen how pale and ill she looked, and some part of him had ached for her, yet he had still been unable to stop those accusations from spilling out.

That night, she hadn’t tried to argue with him about Mingrou again.

Had she already been thinking of divorcing him back then?

He abruptly asked, “Did she like the Shu Brocade I sent her that day?”

The old maidservant hadn’t expected Xie Yuheng to suddenly bring up the Shu Brocade. After thinking for a moment, she replied, “I remember when the steward delivered the Shu Brocade that day. As soon as he left, Rongchun carried it back out.”

“I asked her about it, and Rongchun said she was taking it to the storeroom.”

“Young Madam must have liked it. It was a gift from Eldest Master, after all. How could she not?”

There seemed to be nothing more to ask.

Nor did Xie Yuheng have the courage to continue.

He still couldn’t believe that Ji Hanyi truly had the resolve to divorce him.

If she wanted him to understand how wronged she felt, to pay more attention to her and coax her more, then she had certainly succeeded.

Even if he disliked her forcing his hand this way.

If he compromised this first time, wouldn’t she only push further next time?

The truth was, she didn’t really want a divorce.

Xie Yuheng took a deep breath and forced himself to calm down.

That was right. All Ji Hanyi had left now was a gravely ill mother. What confidence could she possibly have to seek a divorce?

Once Xie Yuheng convinced himself of that, his turbulent emotions finally settled.

He didn’t go to the rear rooms. Ji Hanyi was testing him, and if he let her get what she wanted too easily, she would think she could manipulate him however she pleased.

At worst, he would spend the last few days coaxing her properly.

She had always been easy to coax.

He simply wanted her to understand that she couldn’t behave so willfully again.

Xie Yuheng walked toward the main house alone. He truly did miss the soft warmth of Ji Hanyi’s body, but he needed to uphold the rules and make her understand them.

She couldn’t get her way in everything merely by acting willfully.

The old maidservant following Xie Yuheng couldn’t make sense of it at all. After Eldest Master had asked so many questions, she had assumed he would go and bring Young Madam back. Yet to her surprise, he simply stopped asking.

Everyone in the courtyard had noticed over the past two days that Eldest Master and Young Madam no longer seemed as they had before. They appeared to be at odds, so the old maidservant couldn’t help asking, “Eldest Master, would you like me to call Young Madam over?”

Xie Yuheng wearily rubbed between his brows and waved her off, saying there was no need.

Then he went to bathe and wash up alone.

Ji Hanyi hadn’t been paying any attention to Xie Yuheng, but an old maidservant from the front courtyard came all the way over specifically to tell her that he had returned.

Ji Hanyi rubbed her forehead and had Rongchun send back a message: from now on, there was no need to inform her whenever Xie Yuheng returned to the courtyard.

Despite what Old Madam Xie had said, there was no longer any possibility of reconciliation between her and Xie Yuheng.

She knew Old Madam Xie must have spoken to Xie Yuheng about what had happened today as well. This was for the best. Now that everyone knew where they stood, they could be open and honest. There was no need to keep up appearances or exchange empty pleasantries.

Perhaps this was the outcome Xie Yuheng had been hoping for too.

Back then, he had agreed to their marriage without hesitation. Yet all these years, she had often wondered if he had never truly wanted to accept the match. Perhaps he had only agreed because he was always so sanctimonious and unwilling to become the villain who broke an engagement.

Ji Hanyi rested her head against one hand, loose strands of hair falling beside her cheek. She gazed at the Painting of Ten Thousand Ravines beneath her brush, not yet half finished, as an aggrieved melancholy welled up inside her.

Her feelings for Xie Yuheng had once been sincere. She had sincerely wanted to spend the rest of her life with him.

And so she truly had grieved because of him, just as she now grieved over what had become of them.

The next day, as Ji Hanyi left the rear rooms and headed out, she unexpectedly encountered Xie Yuheng standing by the courtyard gate.

Only one servant accompanied him. A dark green cloak draped over his shoulders, and his face was as flawless as carved jade. Scattered lamplight played across his features. He was exceptionally handsome, aloof and elegant.

Before her marriage, she had secretly seen him once. He had been as warm and lustrous as fine jade, the very image of a gentleman — steadfast as pine and stone.

Aside from Shen Si, she had never seen another face so handsome.

The truth was, she had looked forward to marrying him.

Shen Si was like a solitary moon suspended over an unreachable mountain gorge, like an austere, unfeeling stone steeped in winter cold. At first, Ji Hanyi had approached Shen Si because he was so handsome. Later, the Former Chief Grand Secretary kept smilingly encouraging her to seek Shen Si out and talk to him more. Ji Hanyi had actually been a little afraid of him, but there were far too many fascinating treasures in Shen Si’s study for her to resist.

Xie Yuheng, however, possessed the cool elegance of a fresh breeze beneath a clear moon. He seemed as noble and pure as an orchid, unfailingly courteous and impeccably measured in every interaction. One look at him was enough to make anyone think him a gentleman of sterling character. He had ordinary human emotions and desires, unlike Shen Si, whose joy and anger she could never decipher.

Now that they had encountered each other, neither spoke.

Ji Hanyi could tell that this was no chance meeting. He had been waiting for her here.

Xie Yuheng watched quietly as Ji Hanyi approached. She had always dressed simply. Perhaps she knew how strikingly beautiful she was, for she rarely wore anything in her hair beyond a single jade hairpin or a small kingfisher-feather ornament.

Her cherry-red lips held a natural blush even without rouge, and her almond-shaped eyes shimmered like rippling water. A moon-white cloak trimmed with fox fur enveloped her. Its fur-lined hood rested over her thick hair and framed her small face. Her complexion was fair, her features soft. When she lifted her eyes, her long, thick lashes trembled faintly, making her look irresistibly delicate, with just a hint of adorable petulance.
Delicate and soft-skinned, she held Xie Yuheng’s gaze for a long while.

It suddenly occurred to him that Ji Hanyi was born delicate and alluring, with clear, limpid eyes. She must have grown up indulged and pampered. But here in the Xie Family…

Ji Hanyi had no idea what Xie Yuheng was looking at. It was not yet dawn, and he was waiting there again, watching her. She was in no mood to pay him any attention and simply tried to walk past.

She had only taken one step when a warm hand suddenly slipped beneath her cloak and clasped hers.

“Are your hands cold?” he asked softly.

Ji Hanyi froze. Her hands and feet had always been cold, and she dreaded winter more than anything. She could not even sleep without a bed warmer beneath her covers. Now, with Xie Yuheng’s large hand wrapped around hers, she was briefly dazed before shaking her head. “No.”

Xie Yuheng pressed his lips together. Feeling Ji Hanyi try to pull away, he tightened his grip slightly. Her hand was so small and soft that once he held it, he wanted to grip it even tighter. He momentarily lost himself in thought. This seemed to be the first time he had ever held her hand in public.

Xie Yuheng did not look at Ji Hanyi’s expression. Perhaps he did not dare to. He merely led her forward, his voice as steady as ever. “I’ll go with you to see Mother.”

Ji Hanyi was not strong enough to break free. With so many servants and maids around them, she could only let him lead her toward her mother-in-law’s residence.

Even when they arrived at the courtyard, Xie Yuheng did not let go.

Ji Hanyi finally spoke. “Eldest Master, please let go first.”

Xie Yuheng stopped and turned to look at her. Her slender brows were faintly furrowed, as though she truly disliked his touch.

He still remembered the time he had accompanied her to a temple to pray for blessings. He had merely supported her by the hand, yet her cheeks had flushed with the sweet shyness of a young wife.

But now she was resisting him.

They were husband and wife, yet she resisted even when he held her hand.

Li Mingrou came in from outside. Seeing Xie Yuheng and Ji Hanyi standing in the courtyard instead of entering the main room, she walked over. Then she noticed their joined hands, and her face paled slightly.

Looking up at Xie Yuheng, she called softly, “Cousin, why haven’t you and Cousin-in-law gone inside?”

Ji Hanyi did not look at Li Mingrou. She used her free hand to push Xie Yuheng away, then stepped aside.

The jade-soft hand slipped from his palm, leaving only coldness behind. Xie Yuheng stood distracted for a moment before glancing at Li Mingrou. “Let’s go.”

Li Mingrou nodded, then raised her handkerchief to her lips and coughed several times. Yet Xie Yuheng walked straight past her.

She froze.

This was not how it was supposed to be. In the past, whenever her cousin saw her cough, he would always ask after her with concern.

She stared at Xie Yuheng’s retreating figure, then at Ji Hanyi following behind him. Her fingers tightened around her handkerchief.

In the east warm chamber, Madam Lin watched Xie Yuheng and Ji Hanyi enter one after the other. She did not speak to Ji Hanyi, only asking Xie Yuheng, “You always leave early. Why have you come so late today? Aren’t you afraid you’ll be delayed on your way to report for duty?”

Xie Yuheng glanced at Ji Hanyi beside him. “It’s cold, so I waited for Hanyi to come with me.”

Madam Lin was taken aback.

This was the first time Xie Yuheng had ever said anything like that in front of her. He had never paid much attention to Ji Hanyi before. What had gotten into him today?

Madam Lin did not dwell on it and told Xie Yuheng to leave first.

Before going, Xie Yuheng looked at Ji Hanyi and said softly in front of everyone in the room, “I’ll come back early this afternoon. Wait for me, and we’ll have dinner together.”

Ji Hanyi did not answer. Her lowered eyes betrayed no emotion whatsoever.

Xie Yuheng gave her a long, searching look before finally leaving.

Li Mingrou watched this unusual exchange, her heart tightening slightly.

Madam Lin also found it exceedingly strange. It was as if the sun had risen in the west.

She could not help asking Ji Hanyi, “Has the Eldest Master been sleeping in your room these past few days?”

Ji Hanyi shook her head. “No.”

She did not care where Xie Yuheng had slept last night. Even if he returned to sleep in the main room, it would no longer mean anything to her.

Madam Lin’s brows furrowed at her answer, and her voice grew stern. “Are you trying to leave Yuheng without an heir?”

“If you remain this incapable, watch out — even if Yuheng divorces you one day, no one will be able to fault the Xie Family.”

Li Mingrou turned her gaze to Ji Hanyi’s face, only to find her utterly calm. There was not even a trace of panic in her expression.

Li Mingrou felt that she could no longer understand Ji Hanyi either.

Had she been serious when she said last time that she wanted an amicable divorce from Brother Xie?

When Ji Hanyi still did not respond after a long while, Madam Lin suddenly felt overwhelmingly irritated.

She rubbed her chest as though she could not bear to look at Ji Hanyi for even another moment, then dismissed her.

Ji Hanyi was only too happy to leave. She rose and withdrew at once.

In truth, if Old Madam Xie had not said they would discuss the divorce again in a month, Ji Hanyi probably would have brought it up right then and there.

Li Mingrou stared blankly after Ji Hanyi. In the past, Ji Hanyi would never have dared to simply walk away like this.

Her failure to bear a child was her fault. Before, she would always have apologized even more meekly and cautiously.

Li Mingrou looked back at Madam Lin. After thinking for a moment, she rose and went over to massage her shoulders. “Aunt, Cousin-in-law hasn’t conceived once in three years. Could there be something wrong with her health? Why don’t we call another physician to examine her?”

Still vexed, Madam Lin pulled Li Mingrou down to sit beside her and sighed. “It must be an ill-fated match. If I’d known this would happen, I would rather have borne the stigma of breaking our word than let him marry a woman who cannot bear children.”

“Three years, and not so much as a hint of pregnancy. She spends every day brooding in silence, and lately she’s become increasingly disrespectful.”

“Just looking at her these past few days has irritated me. She’s even driven Yuheng to sleep in the study all the time.”