Chapter 86
Chapter 86
Lu Dong stared at Su Jin in shock. “You…”
Bai Xue interjected, “What?! What do you mean? What child?”
Pei Yuming took a deep breath and said with difficulty, “Zixuan is actually my son.”
“What… what nonsense are you talking!” Lu Dong was the first to object, his face full of disbelief. “Honey, he… he’s lying, right?”
Su Jin was completely immersed in the memories from Pei Yuming’s perspective, almost unmoved by Lu Dong’s questioning.
“You… you and Su Jin, you two actually had a son?” Bai Xue stood up in surprise.
“Impossible! How could Zixuan be your son?” Lu Dong also stood up excitedly alongside Bai Xue.
Pei Yuming looked at them with a complex expression and said helplessly, “Sit down first and let me finish!”
“Listen to what? You explain this to me clearly first!” Bai Xue was furious.
“Right!” Lu Dong chimed in from the side.
Pei Yuming became a bit impatient, glanced at his daughter at the end of the table, and steeled himself: “Then why don’t you two explain to me first why Xiaobei has no blood relation to me at all?”
“Crash!” The sound of a cup falling came from the corner. It was Pei Xiaobei, who was so shocked that she knocked over the glass of juice beside her.
Several adults looked over at the sound. Whether the nominal parents or the biological father, in the end, none of them managed to say a single word of comfort.
The entire room fell utterly silent. Everyone except Pei Yuming felt their brains about to overheat. After a long moment, Bai Xue and Lu Dong exchanged a glance and slowly sat back down, allowing Pei Yuming to pick up the thread of conversation again.
“As for my marriage with Xiao Xue, honestly, I’ve always been well aware that I’m the vested interest. And because the person I married was her, I could peacefully be that vested interest.”
Although Bai Xue had been struck dumb by Pei Yuming’s words, after thinking for a moment, she couldn’t help but ask, “What do you mean? What about me?”
Pei Yuming sighed. “Don’t you understand? You rely on me for your livelihood. You don’t have a steady, formal job, and your maiden family is just an ordinary one that can’t support you. You’re different from Su Jin. If you left me, your life would definitely be more difficult. So, I exploited you without any scruples. Even though we often argued about the unequal distribution of household matters, in my heart, I knew you wouldn’t leave me over these things. Afterwards, as long as I gave you an out, you’d definitely take it. I knew you argued with me because you wanted to solve problems, but have you ever thought that maybe I had no intention of solving those problems? Solving them requires change, requires me to spend effort and time, and I wasn’t willing to, so I always just brushed things off.”
“You really think this way?” Bai Xue found it unbelievable. Her companion of twenty years now seemed like a stranger.
“Yes,” Pei Yuming gave a bitter smile. “I pushed my father, my brother, and Xiaobei’s matters onto you, washing my hands of them. I used work as an excuse to evade the various demands you made. Actually, what you said during every argument was the truth. I’d rather spend a whole day covering a shift for a colleague than an hour on family. Because my vanity needed validation from outsiders to be satisfied. But for family, I didn’t much care about your attitudes. Because to me, I was the head of this household, and I placed myself in a high position, unwilling to guess the thoughts of those below me.”
“You…” Bai Xue was almost unable to stay seated, looking as if she very much wanted to seize this chance to argue for herself. But Pei Yuming stopped her in advance. “Xiao Xue, let me finish first. If afterwards you still want to say something, trust me, you’ll have the opportunity.”
Bai Xue glared at him, but obediently turned her head away, clearly furious at his words.
“Also, there’s a reason our two families could associate for so many years,” Pei Yuming looked at Lu Dong again. “Putting aside your relationship with Bai Xue, I’ve actually always been well aware of Su Jin’s feelings for me. And because of her, I advanced smoothly in the hospital. I’ve always known this, but I never showed it. Until recently when I found out Xiao Xue was having an affair, I deliberately told Su Jin about it to test her attitude and used her to vent my bitterness and frustration at the time. From beginning to end, I never considered taking responsibility for her, because I knew she wouldn’t cling to me persistently. No matter how much it hurt her, she would endure it on her own.”
“No… it’s not like that!” Su Jin’s face was full of disbelief.
Pei Yuming looked at her sadly and continued, “Su Jin, really, these are the truest thoughts in my heart, thoughts I myself was unwilling to face. I’m saying them not to seek forgiveness, nor because my conscience awakened. I’m just sick of my own cowardice and inaction. I always used to think that Xiao Xue ruined our home and our peaceful, happy life. But actually, twenty years ago, I had already ruined my own life. I sowed these seeds, so I deserve this outcome. Although speaking it now can’t change anything, I truly don’t want to run away anymore.”
“No, you’re saying this on purpose!” Su Jin still couldn’t accept it. “You just want to disappoint me, make me back out on my own, right?”
Su Jin’s emotions were somewhat hysterical now, a stark contrast to her usual gentle and quiet demeanor.
Lu Dong looked at his wife with a complicated expression, unable to say a single word of reproach. He had always been a self-aware person; he knew that even if he proposed divorce right now, Su Jin wouldn’t utter a word to hold him back. Besides, he had never considered divorce.
Pei Yuming also hadn’t expected Su Jin to be so persistent. But since things had come to this, he didn’t want to use lies to protect his ridiculous pride anymore. “No, this is the real me-selfish, cowardly, shameless. Su Jin, don’t you understand yet? From beginning to end, the ‘me’ you liked was nothing more than an imaginary version you created. That was never the real me.”
“And then? You push me away with this excuse, but you still want Bai Xue, don’t you?” Su Jin had never been so agitated; anger and resentment twisted her entire face. After shouting at Pei Yuming, she pointed at Lu Dong and Lu Zixuan. “And you two! You’ve both chosen her, bewitched by her face. You men are all the same, you should all just die!”
Lu Dong could only manage expressions of shock and bewilderment. Lu Zixuan, on the other hand, finally couldn’t help but grab hold of his nearly collapsed mother and said aggrievedly, “Mom, what are you saying? What does this have to do with me?”
Su Jin sneered, “Don’t think you can use Pei Xiaobei as an excuse and I won’t know what’s going on in your head. Zixuan, I’m your mother. No one knows you better than I do. You’re dating Pei Xiaobei. Is it because you like her, or because you’re using her to get closer to Bai Xue? Don’t you know the answer yourself?”
Lu Zixuan met everyone’s gazes in shock, then, under all their stares, bowed his head in shame, not daring to glance even out of the corner of his eye at Bai Xue.
Aside from Pei Xiaobei, everyone in the room was far more experienced in life than Lu Zixuan. To them, his reaction was as good as a confession.
“I have nothing to do with him…” Bai Xue felt deeply wronged and couldn’t help but voice her defense.
“So, that’s the reason you…” Pei Yuming didn’t dare finish the thought, but Su Jin understood exactly what he meant.
“Yes, and your dad, your brother! They’re all on Bai Xue’s side, speaking up for her. If they hadn’t been mediating, how could you have forgiven her so quickly?”
“No…” Pei Yuming shook his head to refute. “From the very start, I was using you.”
“You two…” Watching her husband and another woman go back and forth airing old feelings, Bai Xue couldn’t help but interrupt, even though she was the one in the wrong. “Pei Yuming, what do you mean? Shouldn’t you explain things to me first?”
Pei Yuming felt somewhat helpless at Bai Xue’s interruption. He sighed and said, “Xiao Xue, I know about you and Lu Dong. And as for Xiaobei, she’s actually Lu Dong’s daughter. I also know you married me only because I was a suitable match, but I don’t know what purpose you had in getting involved with Lu Dong. Maybe for money. But there are plenty of rich people, so why Lu Dong in particular? Only you know that.”
Pei Yuming’s tone was very calm as he said these things. His gaze swept over everyone one by one, but there was no resentment in it, only profound sadness. He had a feeling that once the police found evidence proving Su Jin was the murderer, Cao Lei’s interrogation of him would end. And once he left that interrogation room, would he ever be able to come back?
He was well aware that, barring the unexpected, this might be the last time they ever saw each other. Although he had said everything he wanted to say, it was already meaningless.
“I’m not saying all this to condemn you. I don’t have the right to condemn anyone,” Pei Yuming said. “In everything that’s happened, even if I wasn’t directly involved in some of it, I still played a part in pushing things along. Xiao Xue, I’m not a qualified partner, nor a good husband or father. So, let’s get a divorce.”