Chapter 85
Chapter 85
Bai Xue saw the two of them enter together and was clearly displeased, but she still took the flowers and smiled as she greeted Su Jin.
Su Jin forced a faint smile in response and silently followed Bai Xue into the kitchen.
With the two of them like that, the mood before dinner was particularly dreary. Lu Dong tried to strike up a conversation with Pei Yuming several times but got no response. In the end, he settled for explaining wine knowledge to Pei Yucheng, who was sprawled on the sofa drinking cola, nearly putting him to sleep.
Still, Lu Dong’s showing off wasn’t entirely wasted. As soon as everyone was seated around the dining table, Pei Yucheng clamored to drink the two bottles of wine Lu Dong had brought, but Bai Xue stopped him on the grounds that the wine needed to breathe.
Pei Yuming went to decant the wine himself this time, and after returning, he unexpectedly proposed a toast. Even Lu Dong looked at him with a hint of newfound respect.
But the very next second, he realized he’d thought too much.
Pei Yuming stood up with his glass, making a grand gesture, but the words he spoke were far from pleasant.
“I’m not toasting to welcome you here today, nor to thank anyone. It’s not even about apologizing. After all, some things can’t be settled with just a ‘sorry.’ What I’m about to say comes straight from my heart, without a shred of falsehood. If any of it differs from what you think, don’t question me, because no one knows my own thoughts better than I do.”
It was rare to see Pei Yuming so serious; Bai Xue couldn’t help calling out, “Honey… you…”
Pei Yuming shook his head at her. “Let me finish.”
He tilted his head back and drained his glass, then sat down again.
“If I’m to be clear, it should actually start twenty years ago.” Pei Yuming glanced quickly at Su Jin; when their gazes met, he seemed afraid of something and quickly lowered his head again. “I’ve always known Su Jin had a crush on me, even back in high school. That’s also why later, when I was an intern, I happened to choose to work under Dean Su, Su Jin’s father at the time. Partly it was my own ability, but partly I had pulled some strings.”
Here, Pei Yuming chuckled lightly, a hint of derision in his smile. “Surprised, Lu Dong? It’s not that I don’t know how to suck up; I just do it more subtly.”
“Before Dean Su set me up with Su Jin, I had already foreseen that day. After we got together, I wasn’t proactive, mainly because I feared gossip-I was afraid people would say I was using my relationship with Su Jin to climb up. But the truth is, in that brief relationship, I did gain benefits and opportunities that money couldn’t buy, but I never admitted it, and convinced myself they were all earned by my own abilities.”
“Especially after meeting Xiao Xue, that idea only intensified, because only that way could I justifiably abandon Su Jin and be with Xiao Xue.”
If Pei Yuming had looked up at that moment, he would have seen everyone else at the table, without exception, with their mouths hanging open in shock.
But this self-destructive confession, especially from someone as proud and aloof as he used to be, was more agonizing than cutting his own flesh, yet at the same time, it gave him a masochistic kind of relief.
“From the very first time I met Xiao Xue, I knew she would come to me. A woman’s mind is easy to read. Actually, not just women; men are the same. In any given circle, all eyes of the opposite sex will involuntarily fix on the most outstanding person, and I was that person. Others thought I didn’t know how popular I was, but I knew it all along.”
“So when Su Jin subtly reminded me to keep my distance from Xiao Xue, I deliberately treated her words as wind past my ears. How could I avoid her? I was hoping Xiao Xue would throw herself at me.”
Pei Yuming felt his wife’s gaze. This time, he didn’t avoid it. Instead, he glanced at Bai Xue and smiled bitterly. “You didn’t expect that, did you? You saw me as prey, but you became the prey first.”
Bai Xue’s lips moved, but she didn’t say anything in the end. Because she knew everything Pei Yuming said was true.
Pei Yuming shook his head lightly again, as if denying himself. “During that time, Su Jin must have had a premonition that our relationship would eventually end. So she used her birthday as an excuse… She thought I was drunk that day. Actually, when she asked me to celebrate her birthday with her, I was already hesitating whether to sleep with her. By then, I had already decided to leave her and be with Xiao Xue. If anything physical happened between us, I wouldn’t be able to take responsibility. But in the end, I couldn’t control myself, and we didn’t even use contraception. I took advantage of Su Jin’s feelings for me and hurt her without restraint. Yet she never complained. As for me, I only felt guilty for a brief moment. Even when Dean Su took back the opportunity he’d given me after we broke up, I resented her. It wasn’t until she later pleaded for me and I managed to stay at the hospital that I slowly forgave her.”
“You knew I…” Su Jin, though stunned by his confession, still couldn’t help asking.
“Yes, I always knew it was you who pleaded for me,” Pei Yuming admitted. “Because no one else could have spoken to Dean Su about it. And even if they could, no one would have been willing to help me. My leaving would have just opened up an opportunity for someone else. But I never truly thanked you from the bottom of my heart, because I felt I deserved it. I attributed all opportunities and resources to my own ability, and I firmly believed that for many years.”
“Brother, don’t say that about yourself…” Pei Yucheng couldn’t bear to listen anymore. For all these years, Pei Yucheng had thought of his older brother as the very definition of excellence. If he wasn’t excellent, then what was he?
Pei Yuming waved his hand at him. “Don’t talk yet.”
Pei Yucheng could only shut his mouth, looking disgruntled.
“After I got together with Xiao Xue, since I still ran into Su Jin at work, people around us often stirred up trouble. I didn’t care about ordinary gossip, but some things reached Dean Su’s ears, and that was another matter. To reduce such influence, I deliberately introduced Su Jin to Lu Dong. Of course, the person involved didn’t know at the time.” Pei Yuming glanced at Lu Dong. “But later, you must have figured it out, right?”
Lu Dong gave an awkward laugh, surprised that Pei Yuming would even bring up such an unspoken truth between men.
“At the time, I actually harbored a sliver of hope that Lu Dong would be rejected. But unexpectedly, Su Jin actually agreed to him, and they quickly got married. Even the Su Family elders didn’t object.” Pei Yuming glanced at Lu Dong again, then finally looked at Su Jin. “Honestly, I was a bit angry about it then, but now I think, you must have rushed into marriage because you were pregnant with my child.”