Chapter 82
Chapter 82
[Li Erfeng Becomes Wanyan Gou – 2]
Seeing Li Gang’s mournful, exhausted expression, Li Shimin had assumed that some terrible disaster awaited him. Yet after patiently listening to the full account, this was the result.
Li Shimin almost laughed aloud. Then he saw Li Gang kowtowing on the ground, blood covering his forehead, and felt immense admiration. He hurried forward and helped him up with both hands. “This realm was carved out by generations of ancestors through thorns and hardship. How could their descendants dare lose a single inch? We must recover our homeland and pacify the Central Plains in the north! Minister Li, rise quickly!”
Li Gang refused to rise. He raised his head, blood running from his forehead down his cheek, and asked sorrowfully, “When Your Highness ascends the throne, will you still remember the great vow you made today?!”
Li Shimin said solemnly, “I will remember it forever. General, please bear witness!”
Li Gang had fought for the assignment of welcoming the new sovereign and galloped from Nanjing, Yingtian Prefecture. He had not come to curry favor with the new emperor. He strongly supported a northern campaign and feared that the new ruler might inherit the glorious bloodline of the Two Sages on their Snow-Country Inspection Tour, become terrified of the Jin, and refuse to send troops. Before coming, he had even prepared to remonstrate with his life. Hearing Prince Kang speak with such righteous passion, tears poured down his face. He bowed again. “This is the good fortune of the people and the state!”
The situation was urgent, so neither man delayed. They immediately mounted and rode into the city to find Prince Kang’s family, pack their belongings, and depart for Yingtian Prefecture.
Inside the space, Zhu Yuanzhang finally understood after hearing the conversation. “Prince Kang, the Jin, the Two Sages’ Snow-Country Inspection Tour, Li Gang, the Four Generals of the Restoration… Isn’t this Wanyan Gou?”
Emperor Gaozu and Ying Zheng looked puzzled and asked in unison, “Hm?”
Liu Che, bruised and swollen in a corner, leaned closer too. “What dog?”
Zhu Yuanzhang rolled his eyes and recited, “‘The humiliation of Jingkang remains unavenged. When will the hatred of the ministers end? Drive the chariots forward and shatter the passes of Mount Helan. With soaring ambition, feast upon barbarian flesh; laughing and talking, drink Xiongnu blood. Begin anew, recover the old mountains and rivers, and attend the imperial court…’ This is the immortal work of Yue Fei, an illustrious minister of his age.”
Deep approval and faint sorrow showed upon his face. “In the second year of Jingkang, the Jin marched south and broke Dongjing, the capital of the Great Song. They carried off Emperors Qinzong and Huizong, along with more than three thousand imperial clansmen, palace women, and nobles. The Northern Song fell. The humiliation it suffered was rarely seen in history. The spectacular behavior of those two emperors and Wanyan Gou forcibly lowered the standard for incompetent rulers…”
Zhu Yuanzhang sighed and explained the entire Jingkang Incident. At the end, his voice was full of contempt. “Qinzong, Huizong, and Wanyan Gou-tsk, tsk. You could search five thousand years and never find a second miraculous combination like them. Worthy descendants of the Chariot God of Gaoliang River.”
As an emperor of the mighty Han era, Liu Che could not imagine such a humiliating dynasty appearing in later generations, much less human beings performing such spectacular feats of incompetence.
Barbarians? They had jumped around for a few years after he took the throne. After that, had they not become dogs of the Great Han?
Ying Zheng’s worldview was also overturned. He was not singling out the Donghu, Dingling, or Xiongnu present-had they not all been garbage to begin with?
Zhu Yuanzhang sneered. “Are those pieces of trash even qualified to stay with us? Wouldn’t they lower our standing?”
Li Shimin had listened throughout the journey. Now he finally asked, “So Yue Fei had essentially reached the enemy’s stronghold at the end?”
Zhu Yuanzhang said, “Yes.”
Li Shimin asked, “Then Wanyan Gou recalled him with twelve gold plaques and immediately chose surrender?”
Zhu Yuanzhang said, “Yes.”
Li Shimin: “…”
It was fucking incomprehensible!
People should stop saying, “If you can do better, you do it.” Even an ordinary person who ignored government and spent every day eating, drinking, and enjoying himself would have done better!
Liu Che stared dumbfounded. “Even tying a dog to the dragon throne would be better than that thing!”
“That is excessive,” Ying Zheng said with reserve. “A dog would at least bark several times when strangers entered the house.”
Liu Che: “…”
Damn. There was no possible rebuttal!
Zhu Yuanzhang continued, “This world’s background resembles the Great Song. You most likely transmigrated into Prince Kang, Wanyan Gou. The finer details will inevitably differ, however. You will have to judge them carefully yourself.”
Li Shimin asked, “Why?”
“Why, why, why? Why are there so many whys?!”
Zhu Yuanzhang said irritably, “Do you know what historical nihilism is?! It cannot be completely identical!”
“…” Li Shimin said, “Understood.”
Inside the space, everyone sighed and lamented.
The great general Yue Fei died upon the baseless charge of “perhaps it happened.” Li Gang wished to kill the enemy, yet was repeatedly demoted. Zhao Ding served twice as chief minister and helped restore the state, only to starve himself to death. There were also Li Guang, Hu Quan, and many more…
Li Qingzhao wrote, “To this day I think of Xiang Yu, who refused to cross east of the river.” Before Lu You died, he still said, “When the imperial armies recover the Central Plains in the north, do not forget to tell this old man during the family rites.” On his deathbed, Zong Ze spoke not of his family but cried three times, “Cross the river!” How could such things not bring tears?
The realm had never lacked righteous men and women willing to shed their blood and sacrifice their lives. Nor did this age lack courageous people. They were merely constrained by the court and an incompetent sovereign. How could one not feel furious enough to beat one’s breast?
The emperors were still lamenting when a strip of white silk floated down from above. Quick-eyed and quick-handed, Emperor Gaozu caught it and glanced over the text. His brow immediately furrowed.
Li Shimin had entered this world earlier than the previous emperors and knew that the white silk contained its idiotic plot summary. He immediately said, “What does it say? Stop fighting over it. Someone read it to me!”
Zhu Yuanzhang frowned in distaste and read:
Swallows that once nested beneath the halls of the Wang and Xie clans now fly into the homes of common folk. After a nation’s fall, even so-called princesses of the imperial clan are merely drifting leaves with nowhere to rest.
With her country and family destroyed, Yongning struggled to survive in this world. Then a pair of warm, strong hands reached toward her, pulling her from the mire and leading her into the light.
She smiled and called him softly, “Brother Zongzhen.”
She never forgot that this man had given her hope. Yet in the end, he also gave her despair. When she and his childhood sweetheart faced danger on the same day, he chose the latter. On the day of their wedding, he abandoned Yongning for that same woman, leaving her alone in stunned heartbreak…
Her heart died in despair, and she resolved to flee far away. Yet he came to find her, embraced her tightly, and said, “I love you.”
Adrift in a chaotic age, where would their love lead?
Zhu Yuanzhang: “Blech!”
Li Shimin: “…”
Liu Che: “…”
Emperor Gaozu: “…”
Ying Zheng: “…”
“Ah, the woman is an imperial clanswoman, and the man is named Zongzhen? That sounds like a Jin imperial generational name. A union between Song and Jin?”
Emperor Gaozu clicked his tongue in wonder. “Good heavens, an international marriage!”
Zhu Yuanzhang exploded. “With a destroyed nation and murdered family, what fucking love and marriage is there to discuss? Isn’t this merely a prettified romance between a captive collaborator and an invader? A Jin man marrying a Song woman as his princess consort? What nonsense!”
Liu Che curled his lip. “Old Zhu, don’t say that. Didn’t your son also marry a noblewoman of the Yuan dynasty as his principal consort?”
“Nonsense! Bringing a woman into your own family and marrying one out to the enemy are the same thing? Besides, I never treated the Yuan people the way the Jin treated the Song!”
Zhu Yuanzhang scoffed. “They invaded your home, captured your father, brother, and entire family, stripped them for the Ceremony of Presenting Captives, and raped or killed your mother, aunts, and sisters. What fucking love can you discuss with people like that? If you lack culture, read a book. If that is still beyond you, visit the Laundry Bureau and see how miserably the captured women reduced to public prostitutes live. Look at Dongjing (Kaifeng), plundered again and again. Are you so idle that you have nothing better to do than fall in love with the enemy who destroyed your country?!”
Emperor Gaozu added, “And he abandoned his bride on their wedding day…”
Liu Che said quietly, “Everything would already have been arranged. Invitations sent, relatives and friends present, both families prominent, and the wedding surely magnificent. Then the man leaves with another woman, abandoning my daughter in front of everyone. My daughter, I, and our whole family become the laughingstock of the realm…”
Ying Zheng said, “No happy ending. Impossible. Do you take me for a man without shame? After destroying the Jin, the man must be captured and executed by five-horse dismemberment. Any greater mercy would be unacceptable…”
Emperor Gaozu clicked his tongue. “Love again. Do these worlds have nothing else? Is everything supported by love?”
Liu Che smiled maliciously. “Brother Li, do you recall your affairs with your favored concubine Lady Liu?”
Emperor Gaozu shook his head blankly. “I only recall an ungrateful phoenix man who relied upon a woman to rise.”
The two exchanged nuclear smiles. Then Emperor Gaozu punched him.
Liu Che was furious and aggrieved. “You already insulted me! Why are you still hitting me?!”
Emperor Gaozu sneered. “Because you can’t beat me. You deserve it!”
Against the background of Liu Che and Emperor Gaozu fighting, Zhu Yuanzhang sighed. “Perhaps we truly are old and cannot understand what later generations think.”
“This has nothing to do with later generations. The so-called love was built on a deformed foundation from the beginning. The core is garbage, regardless of the era.”
Li Shimin frowned in thought. “Give later generations enough funding and see who dares write a tale of true, invincible love between a Chinese woman and Okamura Yasuji. Who would dare say their love is beautiful and unrelated to their opposing sides?”
The emperors: “…”
Holy shit. That captured the feeling.
Instant understanding.
Li Shimin then asked, “So who exactly is this Yongning? Can she still be saved? If her brain can be straightened out, we can try. If not, forget her. This is painful to watch…”
As he spoke, they reached Prince Kang’s residence. Li Shimin dismounted and entered. After walking several steps, he saw a young woman with her back turned, holding a child while picking flowers. His body abruptly stiffened, and his breathing trembled.
…Guanyinbi.
Hearing something unusual behind her, the young woman turned. Her face was round as a silver moon, dignified and graceful. She froze briefly upon seeing Li Shimin, then smiled and approached. “Why has Husband returned? Didn’t you say you would be gone for three days?”
She teased the little girl in her arms and said gently, “Yongning, your father has returned.”
Li Shimin: “…”
Wah, his wife was so gentle! His daughter was adorable!
Liu Che shouted, “Hey, Second Li, control yourself!”
Li Shimin said, “My wife is still so beautiful!”
Emperor Gaozu asked, “Are you all right?”
Li Shimin said, “This child is as lovely as jade and snow, just like Sizi when she was little. Heavens, she smiled at me!”
Ying Zheng asked, “Do you remember what you just said?”
Li Shimin declared, “How could such an obedient, adorable child be at fault? The Jin dog must have seduced her first! Damn that Jin dog. Only tearing him into ten thousand pieces will appease my hatred!”
Zhu Yuanzhang asked, “What happened to ‘If her brain can be straightened out, try; if not, forget her’?”
Li Shimin cried, “Wah, come let Daddy hold you, little darling!”
Liu Che: “…”
Liu Che said, “A veteran hypocrite at first glance.”