Chapter 2

In the end, neither Li Shuyun nor I took the jade rabbit.

It was displayed in the garden hall, separated from Li Shuyun’s Tingfang Courtyard by a single wall.

Every day after lessons, I passed through the covered corridor. Not only could I see the jade rabbit, but I could also hear laughter spilling from Tingfang Courtyard.

There would be my brother’s hearty laugh. “Yun’er, you lost again. No cheating.”

Or Mother’s gentle chuckle. “You impish girl. So thoughtful and considerate, yet such a wicked tease.”

Sometimes Father’s low laugh joined them. A man of few words, he simply rocked in his chair and savored the happiness of having his family together.

Before Mother married, she had been the Grand Tutor’s legitimate daughter and was adored by her family.

Afterward, her husband cherished her. Whatever she cared about became the center of the entire marquis’s estate.

At first, I loved visiting Tingfang Courtyard too.

The first time I went, I noticed that Li Shuyun had more maids than I did.

Walking home with my shadow underfoot, I told myself that she was frail and truly did need extra care.

The second time, I discovered that the grapes in Li Shuyun’s courtyard were sweeter than mine.

As moonlight shimmered across the path, I told myself that perhaps the one grape I had tasted simply happened to be sweeter.

The third time, I saw a pearl hairpin in Li Shuyun’s hair that I had never seen before.

Had Father given it to her, or had my brother?

My paper lantern dropped to the ground, and I stopped dead.

Only Mother would choose something made with such exquisite design and craftsmanship.

I bent to pick up the lantern. Its base had crumpled in the fall, just like my heart at that moment.

Tears rolled down in silence, bright and clear. I could barely breathe.

Why had Mother not given one to me?

I asked myself over and over: Why would she not give one to me?

The last time I entered Tingfang Courtyard was for Li Shuyun’s fourteenth birthday.

After years of attentive care from the entire household and endless medicinal tonics, her constitution had improved and her chronic illness was gradually receding.

Even though early summer was already over, when I arrived in Hu-style riding clothes, she was still wearing a lined jacket of plain silk.

“You went riding again?” For some reason, there was a barb in Li Shuyun’s voice. “Brother said you even brought down a muntjac.”

The customs of our time were liberal. It was perfectly ordinary for the women of noble families to attend women’s academies, hunt, and seek amusement.

The mention of my quarry put me in a good mood. Ignoring her tone, I smiled. “It was mostly luck.”

My seat was beside hers. The moment I sat down, Li Shuyun abruptly covered her mouth with a handkerchief and turned away as though she might vomit.

Mother was alarmed. I sprang up as well. “Do I smell of sweat?”

“You know perfectly well how delicate your sister is.” Mother frowned. “Why would you come here dressed like that?”

Li Shuyun said nothing. When she raised her head again, her eyes were red, tears poised to fall.

“…I have ruined everyone’s pleasure.” Choking on a sob, Li Shuyun rose, pushed away her maid, and fled the banquet in tears.

Everyone froze. My brother reacted first. “I’ll summon the physician.”

A cold rain fell that night. The lamps in Tingfang Courtyard burned until after midnight as servants hurried in and out.

Near midnight, Mother came to my courtyard. The smell of medicine still clung to her, so she had clearly come straight from Tingfang Courtyard.

“You are not to go riding anymore,” she said the moment she entered. “And you are not to wear Hu clothes in front of your sister.”

“Why?” The notion was so absurd that my voice rose. “Are you saying she fell ill because I went riding?”

“Yes.” Mother’s expression was calm. “It was because you went riding.”

“You know why. Shuyun cannot ride a horse; she can barely leave her courtyard.”

“Seeing you so carefree today filled her with such anguish that she coughed blood just now. Would it hurt you so much to endure a little?”

Silence stretched through the room. Thunder rolled across the horizon, and all at once I burst into laughter.

“She gets sick, so I am not even allowed to ride a horse.”

I stared into Mother’s eyes. “If she dies tomorrow, am I supposed to kill myself on the spot?”

Slap!

Mother struck me across the face.