Chapter 4

Chapter 4

After the System finished mocking Yunyuan, it suddenly stopped.

“Why do I feel like you look exactly like someone?”

The corners of my mouth went stiff, and my heart skipped a beat.

The System and I were both people who had been on the verge of death in the real world.

That was why we had transmigrated here to complete missions and earn ourselves a chance at revival.

My real name was Yu Xi. I had been a child star, and I used to be very famous.

It was just that later, that incident happened…

If the System recognized me, it would definitely think I was disgusting and hate me even more.

I was so scared my whole body went rigid, and my palms broke out in sweat.

At last, the System remembered the name.

“Nangong Wenya!

“You look way too damn much like her. Anyone who saw you would short-circuit.”

I wiped my sweat on Yunyuan’s dragon fin and let out a breath of relief.

The System paused, then its tone turned serious.

“Does your tail still hurt? We’re villains. We mess other people up. We don’t hurt ourselves.

“Don’t be so reckless next time, got it?”

Certain memories flashed through my mind. My eyes reddened, and I shook my head.

“But my dad said that as long as you get the result you want, the process doesn’t matter.”

The System disagreed.

“Your dad is an idiot.”

Its voice softened, sounding a little awkward.

“You’re the person I chose. I won’t allow you to get hurt.”

I couldn’t help feeling happy. My eyes immediately turned bright and sparkling.

“Bro, out of so many hosts, why did you choose me?”

The System answered without the slightest hesitation.

“You were the cheapest. You required the fewest matching points.

“I keep roasting people, so my hosts complain about me all the time. I’m almost out of points.”

Then the System added, “Anyway, let’s follow the plot properly and revive as soon as possible.

“After we go home, I’ll treat you to sweet-and-sour pork.”

After a while, I nodded.

“Okay.”

The System said Dragon Valley had excellent feng shui for nourishing fish.

I stayed in Dragon Valley for a few days, and my injuries healed completely.

In the original plot, the Merfolk Princess was imprisoned in Dragon Valley as a hostage.

But with the villain KPI on her shoulders, she still seized every opportunity to stir up trouble.

The second plot point I needed to carry out was:

Drive a wedge between the male and female leads and push their romance forward.

“There are three steps in total. Step one, humiliate the female lead.

“Step two, tell her the male lead likes you and gross her out.

“Step three, wait for the female lead to run off in a fit of anger, then push her into Lao Marsh.

“After that, heh-heh-heh.”

The System’s laugh was especially creepy.

I asked worriedly, “What will happen after that? Will Mo Yao get hurt?”

The System refused to tell me and even snapped at me.

“You’re just a little bean sprout. Don’t ask about grown-up villain business.

“Don’t worry about anything else. Just do those three steps properly.”

I held back the tears in my eyes and sniffled.

“Okay. I’ll listen to you, Bro.”

Before I could go looking for Mo Yao, Mo Yao came looking for me first.

Mo Yao was a Kun. Because her body was enormous, she had to keep eating to replenish her strength.

While pulling out crispy shrimp and stuffing them into her mouth, Mo Yao questioned me.

“What kind of filthy tricks did you use (crunch, crunch, crunch) to bewitch the Dragon Lord’s mind (crunch, crunch, crunch) and make him let you stay at the spiritual eye of Dragon Valley?”

Mo Yao called me a temptress with every other breath, and the more she cursed, the more into it she got.

“You’re like a dung beetle wearing a mask (crunch, crunch, crunch)-shameless and stinking.

“You’re like someone making your bed in a latrine (crunch, crunch, crunch), urgh! Never far from shit.”

…

I silently sighed in admiration. Mo Yao had such a huge vocabulary for insults. She was even better at cursing than my old antis.

Mo Yao cursed until she was tired. Seeing that I still hadn’t reacted, she put her hands on her hips and frowned.

“Aren’t you going to say something?”

I blinked.

“Huh?”

The System exploded with rage.

“What do you mean, ‘huh’? That’s all you’ve got? Hurry up and curse her back! However she cursed you, curse her right back!”

I took a deep breath and said softly, “Re… rebound.”

The System got even angrier. It pulled up the script from its panel and told me to read from it.

“You Kun are all big, brawny, and hideously ugly. How could you possibly compare to us Merfolk, with our lithe and graceful beauty? It only makes sense that Yunyuan wouldn’t be interested in you.”

I still didn’t say anything.

The System said, “What? Can’t read?

“Hang on. I’ll mark the pinyin for you.”

I shook my head.

“But body-shaming is wrong.

“Why should we expect a black Kun and Merfolk to look the same?”

The System was stunned.

“That was… actually kind of insightful.

“Fine. I’ll spend some points and skip this part.

“The real highlight is the next two steps.”

I was delighted. “Bro, you’re so nice. I’ll definitely complete the mission!”

The System’s tone suddenly turned cold, but the end of every word tilted upward.

“Don’t flatter me. I don’t fall for that.

“Just complete the mission properly.”

The System calmly pushed the mission forward. “Step two: tell Mo Yao that you’re into me-cough, into the male lead.”