Chapter 5
With three or four trusted attendants, I boarded the carriage sent from the capital.
My three thousand troops disguised themselves as scattered trading caravans and made their way there quietly.
Senior Attendant Qu, who served Mother, met me at the city gates.
“Her Majesty knows how tiring the journey must have been,” she said with a smile. “She asks that you rest first. There is no need to hurry to an audience.”
Mother could not spare the time even to see me. She merely lodged me in an abandoned residence outside the palace.
I did not know which idle official had left it behind. There was not even a plaque over the entrance.
The furnishings were plain and long neglected. A few sparse bamboo stalks behind the house gave it an air of austere poverty.
“With your happy day so close, it would hardly do for Your Highness not to have a residence of your own.” Even an old palace hand like Qu struggled to smile as she surveyed the weeds choking the courtyard. She coughed. “Urgent circumstances called for haste. I hope Your Highness will not mind.”
How could such a ruin house a pampered princess? It was just the place for a superfluous person like me.
I wiped the table, hid my dust-covered hand behind my back, and smiled. “Please thank Mother for her care.”
Qu said nothing more. Bending her knees in a curtsy, she took her leave.
The moment she was gone, I sent a carrier pigeon to Pei Xuan, telling him to be patient.
Mother had prepared an enormous wedding procession, more than a thousand strong: maids, matrons, cooks, imperial physicians, craftsmen, and an escort of elite cavalry.
It would be easy for my men to infiltrate a party so large.
All I had to do now was wait.
I had not expected Yaohua to visit.
She was as beautiful as I remembered, still worthy of being called the dynasty’s one true pearl.
Her greeting gift was a box of rouge.
“The northern wind is cold and harsh. You must have suffered, little sister.”
I glanced at the fine, pale powder and scoffed. “I have no place among the imperial children. I am not your sister. Call me Ah Yan, as you used to.”
Her smile stiffened slightly.
“This is the finest face powder. Used regularly, it nourishes the skin.” She stole a glance at me. “Even the roughest skin can become soft and luminous. You will be far from home. More than anything, you will need your husband’s favor…”
I smiled without speaking.
“Though you are marrying far away, we are still family, closer to each other than to strangers. If I offended you in the past, let me apologize.”
Blushing, she rose and curtsied.
I admired the faultless grace of her posture and remained silent.
She held the curtsy for a while. When I made no response, she sat down again, embarrassed.
“You must know Mother’s health is not what it was. The court is tearing itself apart over the succession. You and I have no chance at that position. We can only consider whose accession would benefit us most.”
So that was it. For a moment, I had almost thought Yaohua felt concern or guilt over my future.
“Mingzhang is domineering and stubborn. If he rules, we will have to live cautiously, scarcely daring to breathe.”
Mingzhang was the older of my two younger brothers, the one Mother had spent the most effort raising, the unquestioned choice for heir.
“But if… if Mingyue were to take that position, things would be quite different.” Bright excitement entered Yaohua’s eyes.
Yes. A prince who had been cowed by his schoolroom tutors would still have to listen to his elder sister and the senior ministers, even if he somehow came to the throne.
“Mingzhang has always preferred killing foreigners to letting them go. Ah Yan, even if you do not think of your future husband, think of yourself. How many princesses sent abroad in marriage have ever returned home? If our brother makes war on Nanzhao one day, you will be at the mercy of others. How can you expect a comfortable life then?”
Yaohua took my hand earnestly. “Ah Yan, I promise you that if Mingyue succeeds, he will honor the treaty and keep Nanzhao safe. All I ask is that you repeat those exact words to its king. He can decide for himself whether to help Mingyue’s cause.”
I shook my head.
“Yaohua, this war Mingzhang will supposedly wage on Nanzhao is something you have imagined. Why should I help you without a concrete benefit?”
Her pretty face turned red, then white. After a long silence, she gritted her teeth. “When the king dies, you will not have to follow their custom and marry his son. Mingyue and I will bring you home. How is that?”
I lowered my head and smiled.
After all these years, they were still looking down at me from above.
“I’m sorry, Yaohua. I refuse.”
From the beginning, after all, I had never intended to place myself so helplessly in their hands.