Chapter 4

Chapter 4

[Where’s that handsome guy from last night? Why isn’t he here yet?]

[Waiting for the hottie. Here for the hottie.]

I soothed my impatient viewers.

“He said he’d come, so everyone, hang tight in the livestream for a bit. Let’s look at the other callers first.”

The comment section:

[Okay, then let’s look at some pretty girls first.]

[Right, we can wait. Pretty ladies first.]

The first person to connect was an older young man.

“Streamer, can you help me see if this is real?”

Under the dim light, he mysteriously lifted a piece of black cloth.

Only one corner of the grayish-green, cauldron-shaped object was exposed, yet a heavy sense of history came rushing at me.

“Hiss…”

Something was wrong with this thing.

I frowned, put on my glasses, and observed it closely.

My expression grew more and more serious.

It was actually a bronze vessel reserved for ancient royalty.

“Where did you get this?”

The young man rubbed the tip of his nose. “It was passed down from my ancestors.”

“Is that so?”

“What did your ancestors do?”

His eyes flickered, and he stammered.

“Not convenient to say.”

I glanced at him and more or less had my answer.

If he wouldn’t tell the truth, the object would.

“Take a toothbrush, dip it in water, and brush its surface.”

Whether it had just been dug up or passed down through his family, one test would tell.

He did as I said.

Where the water wiped away the dust, the gray faded, revealing a blue-green base and red rust.

After a while, green speckles appeared over the red rust.

I smiled.

Only something recently unearthed would turn green when exposed to water.

Red base, green spots-enough to rot behind bars.

“I see inscriptions on it too. Count how many there are.”

“One, two, three, four… I can’t count them. There are a lot.”

Great. Add another charge to the pile.

Back in ancient times, even nine heads wouldn’t have been enough for him to lose.

The other party was still eagerly pressing me.

“Is this thing worth money? Can I eat abalone and giant lobster every day? Is it enough for an apartment in the capital?”

“Let me put it this way. The last one similar to this sold for a hundred million at auction.”

“Holy crap! I’m rich! It’s the real deal!”

I smiled. “More like a two-for-one grand opening. The doors of both the prison and the museum are opening wide for you at the same time.”

His face changed instantly.

“I’m warning you, don’t talk nonsense!”

The moment he finished speaking, urgent knocking came from behind him.

The young man didn’t think much of it and opened the door.

Then he looked up.

And froze.

A whole swarm of plainclothes police officers stood outside.

Me: “…”

Him: “…”

He didn’t even have time to shout that he was innocent before both he and the object were escorted away on the spot.

The livestream:

[Holy crap holy crap holy crap, what is happening?!]

[The police arrived that fast? Is this some planned show effect?]

[Person above, I guarantee it isn’t! Pure coincidence! The lead officer is my brother, and he’s also a fan of Sister Chao. I just asked him, and he said they happened to be eating nearby, saw the livestream, and confirmed this guy was the tomb robber they’d been secretly investigating all along.]

[Oh my god, real life is way more exciting than fiction.]

After running into a coincidence like that, the livestream’s popularity kept climbing higher and higher.

I thought that would be the end of it.

Who knew it was only the beginning of the night?

Every caller who connected was some kind of legendary oddball.

There was the Bargain King, who bought an ancient coin worth one million from a street stall for five yuan.

There was Uncle Meltdown, who spent five million on a fake and refused to admit it after I pointed it out.

There was the eleven-year-old Genius Little Sis, a prodigy blessed by the antiques gods, who traveled all over the country hunting for old goods.

…

But the most outrageous of them all had to be Diarrhea Bro, who started having explosive diarrhea right after queueing up for a mic connection.

He said he was sorry, but he really couldn’t hold it in.

Even though I reacted quickly and muted him at once, the entire livestream-one hundred thousand people online-still heard his explosive, soup-and-solids diarrhea blasting like firecrackers.

The netizens complained that the livestream smelled and all wanted to run.

I sprayed perfume to deodorize the place and sent out lucky bag giveaways to make them stay.

“Come on, family, don’t leave. I just sent out the biggest lucky bag giveaway on the entire internet in the upper left corner. Go grab it.”