Chapter 3
Chapter 3
The emperor ordered me out.
He drove everyone away. In the entire grand hall, the only sound left was his furious voice.
The comments said he had cried from anger-angry that Consort Gui had the nerve not to love him.
He was clearly the one who had met Consort Gui first. Consort Gui had even saved his life.
And Prince An was clearly nothing but a lying, two-faced bastard who flirted with anything that moved.
His tears turned the comments into a sea of joy.
[That’s the stuff. I’m getting so excited. Ssshaa, ssshaa~]
[As expected, a man’s tears are a woman’s stimulant.]
[Stop crying. If you’re going to cry, cry in my arms.]
That evening, the emperor asked for two basins of ice.
Eunuch Li was utterly helpless.
“It’s already October. Why does His Majesty still want ice?”
Then Eunuch Li complained to me again.
“Xiao Xi, next time, try saying something nice to coax His Majesty. Otherwise, when His Majesty gets angry, none of us will be able to calm him down.”
So Eunuch Li was a fellow practitioner in the art of managing upward too!
That night, His Majesty successfully froze himself into catching a cold.
The next morning, when I went in to serve him, he was wrapped in a quilt, both eyes red.
I glanced at him, then lowered my head and expressionlessly helped him wash up. The emperor looked at his own reflection in the water and said coldly, “Are you laughing at me?”
“This servant would not dare.”
“All you ever say is that you would not dare.”
Me: “…”
What else was I supposed to say?
That I did dare?
So you could chop my head off?
This was entrapment!!!
The imperial physician came and prescribed the emperor a terribly bitter decoction.
The emperor let out a long sigh, looked at me, then looked at the physician.
I was confused. Did he have some embarrassing ailment?
My gaze slid downward…
The emperor gave a cold snort.
The comments lost it.
[Hahaha, he wants some ointment to reduce the swelling around his eyes, but he doesn’t want anyone to know it’s for him.]
[This emperor is way too funny. If you need something, just say it boldly!]
[An emperor who won’t open his mouth. No wonder Consort Gui later misunderstands him as a tyrant. Sure, Consort Gui and Prince An were wrong to rebel together, but the emperor’s refusal to communicate is at least half the problem.]
I let out a long sigh and stepped forward. “Your Majesty, this servant’s eyes have been feeling unwell lately. They’re always swollen and sore. May I ask the imperial physician to take a look at me as well?”
The emperor smiled, visibly relieved.
“Dr. Sun, take a look at her. Prescribe something good.”
Dr. Sun took out a small box of ointment and instructed me to apply it twice a day.
I escorted Dr. Sun out.
Dr. Sun glanced subtly toward the inside and said in a low voice, “It’s best to cry less. Otherwise, even with the medicine, it won’t help much.”
Sir, your insight is truly sharp. You knew I was the one taking the blame.
Then I thought of the emperor again. What was he even pretending for?
Even people outside the palace knew he loved to cry.
Once the emperor got the medicine, he was happy.
He applied it to his eyes. When he saw me come in, he finally remembered to toss me a silver ingot.
“A reward for you. You’re clever enough.”
I smiled at once. However heavy the silver was, that was how heavy a blame I could carry.
“Thank you, Your Majesty. If you need anything next time, please feel free to say so. This servant will handle it properly.”
The emperor smiled, then his expression darkened.
“You know too much. Aren’t you afraid I’ll silence you?”
“…”
I froze.
Damn emperor.
Damn emperor!
Damn emperor!! You really are a dog!
Seeing that he had scared me, the emperor turned his face away with a profound look.
“Help me think of what Consort Gui likes. If you come up with something, I’ll spare you.”
I was so angry I nearly choked.
He could have just paid me overtime to make me work extra hours, but no, he had to threaten me into doing unpaid labor.
Had it never occurred to him that if I was full of resentment, I might not produce good work?
“Your Majesty, Consort Gui enjoys lively occasions. In a few days, it will be the Mid-Autumn Festival. Why not hold a Mid-Autumn family banquet? Invite all the consorts and princes to gather together for a lively reunion.”
The smile on the emperor’s face froze. He looked at me, brows tightly furrowed.
[Hahahahaha, he suspects Xiao Xi is deliberately getting back at him.]
[But he’s not sure, and he doesn’t dare ask, because he’s afraid Xiao Xi knows that he knows Consort Gui likes Prince An.]
After a long while, the emperor coughed.
“Very well.”
I was stunned.
The comments were stunned too.
The last time I saw such a pure love-addled brain was Wang Baochuan, who dug wild vegetables for eighteen years in a TV drama.