Chapter 9

I still did not meet Lin Lanshuang.

I had meant to visit after Mother’s funeral, but she left quietly, without even a letter for me.

I felt a hollow sense of loss.

She must have come to the capital full of hope. Sadly, the world had no room for a woman so bright and unrestrained.

Two more years passed. At seventeen, I was the capital’s most famous old maid.

Anyone with eyes could see that Father was keeping me for the crown prince. Thus, scarcely anyone had come to propose in those two years.

Perhaps because I had always been so obedient, Father had complete confidence in me. He only told me to wait patiently.

Of course. For a concubine’s daughter with a limp, marrying the crown prince was an unimaginable blessing.

Anyone would know which choice to make.

The emperor was unwell. Concern often filled Father’s eyes, and he rarely visited his concubines’ rooms anymore. He looked every inch the loyal minister devoted to serving his sovereign to the last.

Then, one day, the bell tolled nine times. The emperor had died. At the news, Father fell to his knees and wept.

Yet I clearly saw the triumph and anticipation in his eyes.

The emperor’s death meant that the crown prince would inherit the throne and become the new sovereign.

The daughter with the limp, so carefully cultivated for years, would finally be of use.

After the national mourning period, the new emperor held a palace banquet for his ministers and their families.

Father ordered me dressed in finery. Even my walking stick was wrapped with tassels.

Years ago, I had followed behind Mother and my eldest sister, listening as they exchanged pleasantries on every side.

Now, the moment I entered the hall with my stick, a discerning noblewoman came forward to support me.

Fortunes changed. I knew it was the crown prince’s dignity they were upholding, not me.

Young ladies crowded around to chat and joke with me. Only one woman I had never seen before remained seated, watching me with smiling eyes.

I smiled back.

In a single glance, I recognized my young friend Lanshuang.

The new emperor sat high in the hall, raising his cup to drink with us. Just as the late emperor had done, he addressed the ministers below him one by one.

Father’s hand trembled slightly around his cup. He was waiting for the new emperor to call on him, giving him the chance to offer me up.

As he wished, the emperor addressed him. But he offered rebukes, not praise.

First, he accused Father of openly patronizing prostitutes. Then he spoke of several of Father’s students who used his influence to bully the common people and force respectable women into prostitution.

In truth, none of this counted as a great matter, yet the new emperor insisted on humiliating Father, enumerating his faults in public.

He was telling everyone present, unmistakably: the Duke of Su does not have my favor.

Father had indeed helped the new ruler’s rise, but he had been far too conspicuous these past years. Once drunk, he had even referred to himself as a prince.

The imperial secret guard saw and heard everything. Did he truly believe that nothing escaped his ducal residence?

If he had not schemed against the crown prince so relentlessly—if he had married me off early and done his best to play down the debt owed for saving his life—perhaps the crown prince would have spared him.

Instead, he insisted on a dangerous course, showing off at every turn and making sure the world knew how highly I was valued.

He had never stopped to think: if the crown prince truly wanted to marry me, he would have brought me into the Eastern Palace long ago. Why wait until he took the throne?

Father dropped to his knees with a thud. Great drops of sweat fell onto the luminous steps.

“I… acknowledge my guilt.”

At that moment, he must have understood it all. He had thought he held the upper hand, but he had no power to withstand the emperor’s anger.

Several noblewomen who had been toasting me moments earlier instantly grew cool.

Then, unexpectedly, the new emperor spoke my name.

“I offer this cup to the fourth young miss. Had she not risked her life to save me, I would not be sitting here today.

“Whatever you desire now, you need only ask.”

He was repaying my kindness before all his officials. He was also telling them that the Duke of Su’s personal conduct had nothing to do with me.

Once, I had leaped forward and broken a leg to win myself a way out.

Now I advanced with my walking stick and stood once more beneath the luminous steps, looking up at the new emperor from afar.

The hall was utterly still. Everyone watched me, waiting to learn what I would ask.

They all thought I loved the new emperor deeply and would surely ask to enter his palace as a consort, serving at his side.

Or perhaps I would display the utmost filial devotion and take this chance to beg him to pardon the Duke of Su.

No. Neither.

I knelt and bowed resolutely. “Your Majesty, I ask only for a title in my own right and the revenues of a thousand households.”

Everyone drew a sharp breath.

For a woman to be granted such a title was unheard of. What right did I have—a concubine’s daughter with a limp?

I drew out the coming-of-age gift the crown prince had given me and respectfully presented it.

The exquisite box held only a slip of paper, bearing four characters: “I grant you one request.”

It carried neither a vermilion endorsement nor an official seal. But I trusted a gentleman’s promise. Surely he would not go back on his word.

This was the greatest wager of my life.

I could not bear to remain in the ducal household, dependent on Father’s whims, only to be used again as a bargaining piece.

Marrying into the imperial family would merely take me from the duke’s residence into an even larger cage.

Mother had come from a powerful family, yet after marrying Father, she still had to bear his children and run his household. In the end, she was parted from her child in life and estranged from her husband.

Mama had been humble and accommodating, but that could not withstand Father’s fondness for the new and disdain for the old. One new woman after another was brought in until he forgot her as a matter of course.

At home, obey your father. Married, obey your husband. Widowed, obey your son.

Women were human beings just as men were. Why should we be born to wear ourselves out in their service?

I refused!

The new emperor said nothing. Below him, ministers and noblewomen whispered in little groups. At last, the pendants of his crown stirred.

“Then let it be as you wish.”

No one had expected it. Yet to me, it made perfect sense.

A man who could be a close friend to a woman like Lanshuang could not be wholly bound by convention.

Thank heavens. My wager had paid off.

“You are hereby created Marquess of Gangong, with ten thousand taels of gold and the revenues of a thousand households. Choose a day to move to Huaizhou. You may not return to the capital without a summons.”

My heart gave a start.

To avoid arousing Father’s suspicions, I had not dared do business in the capital. After considerable effort, I had managed to establish some ventures in Huaizhou instead…

By allowing me to establish my own household, he was repaying his debt and wiping it clean. From now on, I was no longer Fang Sisi, the Duke of Su’s concubine-born daughter with the limp.

I was Fang Yuqiang, Marquess of Gangong, ennobled by the emperor himself.

So he had known everything all along, yet had still been willing to honor his promise.

“Your servant thanks Your Majesty for this boundless grace.”

On the day I left the capital, the willows rustled. No one came to see me off.

At the outskirts, hoofbeats drew nearer. A woman in red rode toward me.

“I hear that peonies cover Huaizhou in spring. Shall we travel together this time?”

I was a little surprised. Everyone knew how the crown prince felt about her. Now that he was emperor and could finally make his own decisions, why was she still leaving?

An instant later, I understood.

Someone so free-spirited would never willingly become a caged bird, confined by love.

I reached out and pulled her into the carriage, brushing away a willow leaf caught by her temple.

“Gladly. I’ll go with you!”

(The End)

End of the Main Story

Extra: The Crown Prince

In my life, I have given only two people their freedom.

The first was the Fang family’s concubine-born daughter, who wanted to escape the Duke of Su’s control. She had lost the use of a leg for me. I could not leave that debt unpaid.

Besides, the Duke of Su was a hypocrite, always trying to use that debt to constrain me. Naturally, I was pleased to see a breach between father and daughter.

The second was General Lin’s daughter, Lin Lanshuang.

She was the only woman I ever loved.

How exhilarating it had been to gallop through the streets with her.

But Mother disliked her. To secure my position as crown prince, I had to appease Mother and coldly watch as other noblewomen humiliated and belittled her.

From that moment, I knew she could never be mine in this life.

Later, when Fang Yuqiang left for Huaizhou by imperial decree, she rode out to see her off and never returned to the capital.

My covert guards reported that she and Fang Yuqiang drank and enjoyed themselves in Huaizhou, and had even devised all sorts of strange and curious things.

Whenever I heard such reports, I felt an urge to order her bound and brought back to the capital.

But apart from the throne, I had nothing to offer.

I could give her neither the freedom she loved most nor a promise that she alone would be mine.

What use, then, was there in imprisoning her?

I withdrew the covert guards and stopped deliberately seeking news of her.

During the consort selection that year, one of the candidates resembled her.

I knew my ministers were guessing at my wishes. Even so, I kept the girl.

Sadly, she looked like her, yet she was not her.

Perhaps life was never meant to be perfect. Even an emperor had regrets.

So be it.

If I could not have her, then let me wish her a lifetime of happiness.