Chapter 3

My eldest sister was nearing her coming-of-age ceremony.

Mother had already found a suitable match: the principal wife’s eldest son of the Marquis of Zhongyong. He was said to be exceptionally handsome and had earned military honors while still young. He now served as a first-rank guard at the emperor’s side.

He was one of the emperor’s rising favorites.

Life in Mother’s courtyard was very good indeed. In less than six months, I had grown plump and quite a bit taller.

The books said that every grain of rice cost toil. Wealthy households taught their children those words, yet people who had lived in luxury since birth could never truly feel their meaning.

Only those who had gone hungry could understand.

Though I now had food and clothes enough, I still finished every meal, leaving not a single grain of rice.

Thanks to Mother, that New Year my eldest sister and I were allowed to stand one on either side for the first time.

Father must have taken more concubines. Several beautiful young women I did not recognize sat in the hall, gazing at him with tender, seductive eyes.

My brothers and sisters took turns kowtowing to Father and Mother with New Year’s greetings. Stroking his beard, Father delivered another lecture.

His favoritism was plain. He valued Mother’s son and daughter most of all.

When my turn came, bewilderment flashed in his eyes.

He had forgotten who I was again.

“This is Little Fourth, Lady Zhao’s daughter,” Mother said.

Father nodded, showing little feeling. He had too many children. Plain and without anyone to rely on, I was hardly memorable.

“Honor your parents and respect your elder siblings. I expect you to know your place and conduct yourself properly. Do not disappoint me after all I have taught you.”

I answered respectfully, kowtowed, and returned to my place behind Mother.

I felt neither joy nor resentment.

On the tenth day of the first month, a messenger from the palace brought an edict inviting officials of the third rank and above, together with their families, to a banquet.

The emperor was said to live simply and rarely give banquets. But news had arrived around the New Year that our army had won a great victory over Boliu and was returning in triumph. Delighted, he had decided to celebrate with his ministers.

Each official could bring three relatives. Mother and my eldest sister would naturally attend, but for some reason, Father also ordered Mother to take me—something he had never done before.

My eldest sister was extremely beautiful. Mother deliberately chose a relatively understated winter outfit for her, with ornaments chiefly of green jade: composed and entirely proper.

I was plain and had now eaten myself round. Mother chose red clothes for me and had my hair tied into two little buns, with bells that jingled at every step.

With my makeup on, I looked just like a child in a New Year print.

Everything was ready. Yet on the day we entered the palace, my eldest sister was not wearing the clothes Mother had prepared.

Her hair was laden with gold, pearls, and jade, and she wore purple. Her whole appearance made it seem that she was going to become a prince’s consort.

Father nodded at her finery. “Now that is my daughter, radiant as a pearl.”

“Isn’t this rather ostentatious…?” Mother asked anxiously.

Father gave a light snort. “What do you know of such things? His Majesty is gracious. He likes to see his ministers’ families splendidly dressed.”

Mother did not argue, but the worry in her eyes deepened.

I thought Father had a point. My eldest sister was so beautiful that she ought to dress well, so everyone would know the loveliest girl under heaven lived in the duke’s household.

Only when I looked back later did I realize how terribly wrong and naive I had been.

When a man would stop at nothing to climb higher, everything he did was for his own advantage.

Even sacrificing his daughter.