Chapter 47
Chapter 47
Shen Yanqi glanced back at her. In the end, he said nothing and hurried away.
“Deputy Commissioner Shen!” Xing Shuwei clutched the cell’s doorframe and called anxiously.
Zhang Mingan silently watched her from behind. She was worried about Pei Xianjing.
She had said those things only because she did not want Shen Yanqi to seek out Pei Xianjing and bring trouble upon him.
Pei Xianjing’s standing at court and the Emperor’s trust in him rested upon his iron impartiality.
Yet Pei Xianjing had already broken his own rules for her. She could not see it, but Zhang Mingan understood perfectly.
By agreeing to become Imperial Tutor to the Eleventh Prince, Pei Xianjing had plainly decided to spare the Chu clan and support Consort Chu.
And all of it had been prompted by Princess Jin’an ordering her eunuchs to violate Xing Shuwei.
Zhang Mingan had chosen today to eliminate his full elder brother precisely because he was certain Pei Xianjing would save Xing Shuwei.
To save Xing Shuwei, Pei Xianjing would have to drag him out as well.
“Set your mind at ease and wait for him to save us.” Seeing Xing Shuwei gripping the door so tightly she was about to injure both hands, Zhang Mingan tried to persuade her.
Xing Shuwei turned and looked at him with loathing. “You’re despicable.
“If you want to compete with him, then do it honorably and in the open. What kind of gentleman uses me?”
Zhang Mingan still wore a smile. “I was never a gentleman.
“Acting honorably is for men like Pei Xianjing and Yanqi, not me.
“I couldn’t even defeat my own full brother. If I don’t use a few underhanded methods, how could I compete with anyone else?
“You should understand me better than anyone. Both of us only want to stay alive. What is wrong with that? Don’t you want to live?”
“Twisted logic.” Xing Shuwei could not calm her heart and had no desire to argue with him further.
Zhang Mingan’s smile faded, and he said no more to her.
No one tortured them, yet Xing Shuwei found every moment in the imperial prison exceptionally difficult to endure.
After spending four years at Pei Xianjing’s side, she knew all too well what it had taken for him to become Great Yue’s “blade of the state.”
Great Yue needed him. Qizhou needed him.
She could not drag Pei Xianjing down from his pedestal for her own selfish sake.
Part of Xing Shuwei believed he would never abandon his principles or damage his career for her, while another part believed he would come.
She had never been able to fathom Pei Xianjing’s temperament. At this moment, it was more inscrutable than ever.
At five in the morning, Pei Xianjing appeared in his official robes.
The cell door opened. Brow furrowed, he took her hand and pulled her out of the cell.
Xing Shuwei’s lips moved, but in the end she could not bring herself to call him “Eldest Young Master.”
She glanced back. A member of the Embroidered Uniform Guard was respectfully inviting Zhang Mingan out of the cell as well.
Xing Shuwei felt as though knives filled her throat, every breath like swallowing another blade.
“Worried about him?”
Seeing her look at Zhang Mingan, Pei Xianjing asked coldly.
Xing Shuwei hurriedly shook her head.
No.
She had never cared whether Zhang Mingan lived or died.
She looked at Pei Xianjing with eyes full of apology. The disappointment in his gaze resembled ice over winter water, radiating a bone-deep chill.
“I had Chengde escort Qiutong back to the estate first.” Pei Xianjing assumed she was worried about Qiutong.
“Mm,” Xing Shuwei answered softly.
After they left the Northern Pacification Office, Pei Xianjing ordered her into the carriage.
She stood beside it without moving for a long time.
Dawn was approaching. If she openly rode his carriage back to the Duke’s estate, someone might see them.
“What is it?” Pei Xianjing’s voice was so calm that it frightened her.
“You weren’t afraid of ruining your reputation when you helped him kill someone, but now you’re afraid to ride in my carriage?
“Can you still not distinguish between the demon devouring you and the person protecting you?”
His voice was like a poisoned blade thrust into her back.
“I…” Xing Shuwei tried to speak but hesitated. In the end, she could only climb into the carriage.
This time, Pei Xianjing did not offer a hand to help her.
At this hour in spring, the sky was still dim, and the inside of the carriage was black as ink.
There was a small lantern, but Pei Xianjing did not light it.
He sat down, seized Xing Shuwei’s arm, and forced her onto his lap.
His grip was so powerful that Xing Shuwei felt her bones might be crushed.
“Do you know what fate awaits you if you’re convicted of murdering the son of a high-ranking noble?” In the darkness, Pei Xianjing caught her chin with perfect accuracy and forced her to face him.
Xing Shuwei could not see his face, but she could still feel his cold, sinister gaze, as though he meant to devour her alive.
“I didn’t anticipate it,” Xing Shuwei explained. “If I’d known this would be the result, I would never have gone to the meeting.”
“You never listen to a word I say. Xing Shuwei, are you determined to be the death of me?” Anger surged through Pei Xianjing.
Zhang Mingan had gotten her thrown into the imperial prison, yet when Pei Xianjing led her out just now, she had actually shown concern for him.
“You aren’t someone who cannot tell right from wrong. Yet after meeting him only a few times, you’ve become so carried away that you care neither for your own life nor for Xing Shuyan’s future and survival?
“Xing Shuwei, I never imagined you could be so foolish.”
“I never meant to implicate you.” Enduring the pain, Xing Shuwei explained patiently.
“But the fact is that you did.” Pei Xianjing’s voice was glacial.
“You didn’t have to come. I never thought you would save me, and I didn’t want you to.” The words came from the bottom of her heart.
The thought had circled endlessly in her mind inside the imperial prison.
More than praying for her own escape, she had prayed that Pei Xianjing would not come.
There was nothing wrong with her wanting to live.
But everything that had happened today was a disaster of her own making.
As the saying went, “Calamities sent by Heaven may be escaped, but calamities brought upon oneself leave no hope.”
She would bear the consequences she had created.
“Ha.” Pei Xianjing gave a cold laugh. “Don’t you find those words ridiculous?
“If that is truly what you thought, why didn’t you say so when I brought you out of the imperial prison?
“Now you say one thing while meaning another. In your eyes, am I nothing but a fool for you to toy with as you please?”
“Pei Xianjing.” Xing Shuwei raised her voice. “What you’re saying is…”
She swallowed the words “going too far.”
What right did she have to accuse him?
He had saved her life yet again.
She ought to be weeping with gratitude.
Pei Xianjing’s breathing was heavy and did not calm for a long while.
He clasped the back of her head and forced her toward him, turning his anger into a lingering kiss and pouring all of it into her.
“Mm… ngh.” It was impossible to tell whether Xing Shuwei was crying or struggling for breath.
Her mouth was already sore and inflamed. Under his kiss, the pain became nearly unbearable.
Her hand had only just touched Pei Xianjing’s shoulder, before she could push him even once, when he caught it and twisted it behind her back.
Unable to move, Xing Shuwei could only endure all the fury he vented upon her.
After a long while, on the verge of suffocation, she let out several muffled whimpers.
Pei Xianjing did not release her as he had in the past.
She struggled to open her eyes.
The carriage was no longer quite so dark.
In the half-light, she discovered that Pei Xianjing’s eyes were open as well.
He was looking at her with an unfamiliar expression.