Court Official
The Eldest Daughter Gives Up
I was the eldest daughter of the family-the one no one favored.
From childhood, I was taught to be composed and proper, to serve as an example for my younger siblings.
And yet my fiancé was stolen away by my seemingly innocent and adorable legitimate younger sister.
My younger brothers remembered none of the good I had done for them. They only resented me for disciplining them too strictly. Even my parents saw me as nothing more than a tool to polish the family name, wholeheartedly taking my legitimate younger sister’s side.
Faced with all this, I spread my hands and gave up. From then on, I refused to involve myself in anything happening in the manor.
I let them flounder through one petty mess after another, gradually falling apart until none of the old warmth remained. Even that innocent and adorable legitimate younger sister, once she lost my support, was no longer the treasure of their hearts.
The Frog Princess
In the Fifth Year of Taiyuan, at the Start of Summer, a princess died in the Beiliang Royal Palace.
And a toad.
Anping was that unfortunate princess.
And I was that unfortunate toad.
Fortunately, since her death, I have become her.
The Grand Tutor
“Miaoren, this beauty mark of yours is truly lovely.”
Xuan Changjun lifted my bridal veil. By the light of a small lamp, he reached out and gently brushed the tiny mark at the corner of my eye.
I smiled at him. “Husband, is this beauty mark the only lovely thing about me?”
He did not answer. Instead, he said, “Xuan’er has a beauty mark just like it. It makes her look especially lively.”
I nodded and told him, “Wait a moment.”
Turning around, I fetched paper, brush, and ink from the writing desk and spread them out before him. “Go on. Write it.”
He looked up at me. “Write what?”
I straightened the tinkling jeweled flower in my hair and said unhurriedly, “A divorce letter.”
Xuan Changjun chuckled softly. “Miaoren, there are seven grounds upon which a man may divorce his wife. You have committed none of them, so how could I write such a letter?”
“Oh?” I lazily propped my chin on one hand while scraping the lid of my teacup with the other. “And what are these seven grounds?”
“A wife may be cast out for seven reasons: disobedience to her parents-in-law, childlessness, adultery, jealousy, serious illness, excessive talkativeness, or theft.”
I nodded, rose to my feet, and stood across from him.
“Go fuck yourself!”
I kicked him over. He toppled backward onto the bed and sank into the red silk wedding quilt embroidered with mandarin ducks.
“Y-you… Miaoren! You, you…” Struggling upright, he clutched his chest and stared at me in shock.
Taking up the brush, I neatly drafted the divorce letter for him:
There is now a wicked woman in this household. She is unfilial to her parents-in-law, disobedient to her husband, and disrespectful to her elder brother- and sister-in-law. She is therefore cast out.
“All you need to do is press your thumbprint onto it,” I said. “Otherwise, I’ll turn the entire Xuan Family upside down. Today I kicked you over. Tomorrow, I’ll dare to beat your father, curse your mother, ruin your family’s reputation, and squander your fortune. Changjun, you should simply accept your fate.”
“Miaoren, why are you doing this?” Xuan Changjun had been a scholar before entering officialdom, so he did not panic when trouble arose. Once he had caught his breath, he said, “I only married you because you liked me.”
“Oh, Changjun, that may be the most absurd joke under heaven!” I clapped my hands, sat down in the armchair, and lowered my head to peel a grape. “Do you know who I am? I am the Grand Tutor, an official of the first rank. Even His Majesty must courteously address me as his teacher. And what are you? A newly crowned Literary Champion. What official rank can you even expect to receive? I lowered myself to marry beneath my station, yet you somehow have the nerve to claim I married you because I liked you?”
Xuan Changjun’s face alternated between red and white. After a long silence, he finally managed to say, “Since we are both scholars, you should not use your official rank to lord it over others.”
“You’re a scholar, my ass. You’re clearly a lecherous creep pretending to be some charming libertine. What a joke!” I sneered, then continued, “I’ll tell you the truth. I chose you reluctantly because I thought you were devoted and faithful, which would spare me plenty of jealous squabbles in the future. If I’d known that a beast like you was lusting after his own younger sister, I would have refused even if the emperor himself arranged the marriage. I’d have gone and beaten the emperor too!”
“You… Miaoren!”
“What? Did I say anything wrong? I’d long heard that your younger sister Changxuan looked seventy percent like me-even the beauty mark at the corner of her eye was identical to mine. I didn’t believe it at first, but after seeing her in person, I realized she truly does resemble me.”
“How could you say Xuan’er resembles you? You’re clearly the one who resembles Xuan’er!” His face flushed red with agitation.
“Say whatever you like. The divorce letter is right here. Hurry up and press your thumbprint onto it. I’ll return to my residence at once, and from this day forward, we’ll each go our separate ways.” I gave the flimsy sheet of paper a shake. “Hurry. You’re a grown man, so why are you being so indecisive?”
Even as I was leaving, he still called me Miaoren.
I told him, “Lord Xuan, I happen to love throwing my rank around. You’d better address me as Grand Tutor Yu.”
The Moon Entwines the West Pavilion
I served at the Empress Dowager’s side for twenty years as her chief palace maid.
Steady, dignified, respected by all.
No one knew.
I had borne two children for the Son of Heaven.
Only on her deathbed did the Empress Dowager discover our secret affair.
She held my hand, seeming to sigh.
“Silly child. You kept this from me for so many years.”
“I will issue an imperial decree at once and have you enter the palace as a consort, so mother and children may be reunited.”
In my previous life, I truly did enter the palace.
But by then, Zhao Xun already had a Noble Consort he cherished above all else.
He favored me for a time, then cast me aside without a second thought.
Even my own children acknowledged another woman as their mother.
Now, reborn into this life,
I no longer wanted to be his consort.
Beside the Empress Dowager’s sickbed,
I kowtowed heavily. “This servant would never dare presume upon imperial favor.”
“I beg the Empress Dowager for mercy. Please allow this servant to leave the palace.”
The Night I Became Empress, He Gave Me Poisoned Wine
On the night I was crowned Empress, Lu Yuheng personally handed me a cup of Poisoned Wine. He said that since the Ye Family’s name had been cleared, I should spend one night as a glorious Empress before going to meet my kin with a clean slate. But what he didn’t know was that the most painful wound of my life was never death-it was him.
Tomorrow, I Will Come Bearing My Qin
I was the founding Imperial Tutor of a dynasty.
I came here burdened with a mission from the System: to save a collapsing, chaotic realm.
In the end, all I earned was the hatred of countless people.
The young chief minister I had known since our youth became a stranger to me, standing against me at every turn.
The Guardian General I had personally promoted despised me for monopolizing power and ruling the court as a dictator.
And the Young Emperor, the boy I had raised with my own hands… He hated me most of all for tearing him away from the one he loved.
So they laid a trap for me and forced me to drink poisoned wine, driving me to take my own life.
Then, after my death… They summoned a shaman to call forth my memories.
They wanted to expose every evil deed I had ever committed to the world.
But later, after each of them had seen my memories… Every last one of them went mad.
Walking Beside You
For three nights in a row, my maid said the same thing in her sleep:
“It seems one of the chickens in the backyard is missing.”
I simply assumed she was exhausted from her daily chores and thought nothing of it.
That was until we encountered a landslide on our way to the Capital. My maid was killed in the disaster, but I was rescued by soldiers who arrived just in time.
Trembling and lost, I sought out the commanding officer, intending to reveal my true identity as the daughter of the Provincial Commander.
He glanced at the maid’s clothes I was wearing and suddenly asked:
“Are the hens still brooding lately?”
Year After Year Without Worry
When I was young, I found the Crown Prince and took him with me as we spent three years begging for a living.
After the Crown Prince was restored to his position, the Emperor took me in as his adopted daughter.
Everyone assumed that I would be betrothed to the Crown Prince. Instead, the Crown Prince became engaged to the legitimate daughter of the Duke’s Mansion.
On my birthday, he remarked with a casual smile in front of the crowd, “How can one of noble blood be matched with a beggar?”
I raised my glass and sincerely wished him a life free of worries, year after year.
He did not yet know that I had accepted the decree for a marriage alliance.
In the years to come, there would be no more Ah Yu by his side.