Comedy

I was doing fortune-telling on livestream when I connected to Qin Shi Huang.

“I wish to know what became of my Great Qin in the end,” he asked.

I opened a history book.

“After your death, Zhao Gao and Li Si joined forces to put Hu Hai on the throne, then forced Prince Fu Su to take his own life.

“One year after your death, chaos swept the realm, and Liu Bang and Xiang Yu rose in rebellion against Qin.

“Three years after your death, the Qin dynasty fell.”

The more Qin Shi Huang listened, the angrier he became. He raised his hand and smacked Hu Hai, who was playing with mud off to the side, twice upside the head.

“Look at the mess you made!”

Because I coveted the Crown Prince’s beauty, I snuck into the Eastern Palace and became a Dark Guard.

The Crown Prince was temperamental and unpredictable, so I only dared to drool over him in secret.

Until the day he was deposed and reduced to a commoner.

Taking advantage of the chaos, I locked him inside the dungeon I had painstakingly built.

“You wretched slave! Release me at once!”

The proud Crown Prince’s eyes reddened with fury, making him look even more enticing.

I slowly undid his belt and pinned him against the damp brick wall.

“Let you go? I can’t do that. But… having you? That I can do.”

I devoured the Crown Prince completely and forced him through one position after another.

Until later.

I caught a Dark Guard slipping into the dungeon and kneeling as he begged the Crown Prince to return to the palace.

And the man who, just last night, had refused to yield beneath me even if it killed him, curled his lips in a lazy smile.

“No hurry. The Crown Princess and I still have some candlelit reading to do tonight.”

…

The freshly printed copy of Dragon and Phoenix Harmonizing Eighteen Positions in my hand fell to the floor with a smack.