Ranking

My roommate insisted on teaching me how to chase her childhood sweetheart.

Then she turned around and made a post asking for help:

[My good son said he wants to date, so as his dad, I introduced him to my roommate.

[And he got mad.

[How am I supposed to coax him, huh~]

The comments were dying of laughter:

[Brother Pei doesn’t want to date. He wants to date you.]

[He’s mad because you’re so clueless!]

The barrage comments exploded too:

[If the supporting female character tries a little harder, this dense female lead is about to realize her own feelings.]

[With her in the middle, their feelings will heat up and sparks will fly, and then they’ll finally break that last unspoken barrier~]

[She’s seriously using 001 like he’s Unit 001, huh.]

[Pretty durable, then. So when is she going to use him up and toss him in the trash?]

I let out a soft laugh.

Then I deleted the draft I’d been about to post: [Not chasing him anymore.]

You want me to keep pursuing him?

Sure.

It’s just that-

if I really do win him over,

don’t go being unhappy about it again.

My computer got hacked, and the hacker threatened to leak intimate photos of me and my ex-boyfriend.

I logged into my big Weibo account and started flaming the hacker right back:

“Then post them, if you dare!

“My ex-boyfriend is handsome, and his body is incredible. Anyone who sees him will be jealous of me.”

The hacker snapped. “Do you have no shame?!”

The netizens said, “I want all the information on her ex-boyfriend within one minute!”

On the first day of the Lunar New Year, I climbed out of my childhood friend’s bed.

He lit a cigarette with careless ease.

“Leave through the back door in a bit. Don’t let my girlfriend see you.”

I froze. “You have a girlfriend? Since when?”

He curled his lips in a cold smile.

“None of your business.”

“You were the one who came on to me last night. I’m not taking responsibility.”

My expression turned indescribable.

“The person who slept with you last night wasn’t me…”

It was the cleaning lady from the guesthouse, who also happened to be his second uncle’s wife.

I had only come over to clean up the mess for them.

I transmigrated into the story as the male lead’s sex-crazed wife. Every day, I pestered him to do it with me, endlessly demanding and never knowing restraint.

The couch, the bedroom, the kitchen, the floor-to-ceiling windows…

Only when the hatred value soared to 99 did I realize in horror that I hadn’t transmigrated into a smut novel at all, but a clean romance!

Su Yu was actually the kind of male lead who was cold and abstinent when it came to sex!

From then on, I lived in constant fear, treading on eggshells and never daring to cling to him again. As soon as night fell, I’d head to a hotel and not come home.

I even took the initiative to ask for a divorce.

I hoped it would make him hate me a little less.

But the man finally snapped. Eyes red, he erupted and locked me down in a pathologically unrestrained grip, every word crazed:

“Why don’t you cling to me anymore?”

“Is it because I’m getting old, or because that XL one outside has already satisfied your appetite?”

I went to great lengths to win over Zhou Tingshen, but he treated me badly.

He never made our relationship public, never took the initiative to share anything about his life with me, and never showed me any care or concern.

At first, I thought he was just reserved by nature.

That was until the day I heard someone ask him:

“Brother Shen, why does that old classmate of yours keep looking for you? You two aren’t dating, are you?”

“Isn’t our great beauty Du chasing after you? I thought you two were the couple.”

After a long pause, Zhou Tingshen finally spoke. “We’re not dating.”

I picked a time and asked Zhou Tingshen out, then seriously tried to discuss it with him.

“Zhou Tingshen, could you… pretend we were never together?”

A flash of impatience crossed his face. “What are you making a fuss about now?”

“I’m not making a fuss. Just take it as me begging you. I can’t let my friends know this is the kind of relationship I’m in. They’ll laugh themselves to death at me. It’s too humiliating…”

The fox spirit I’d been tracking for so long had finally shown up.

I sneaked into the dressing room of a top idol, buried my face in his clothes, and said excitedly, “Ah~ this is the scent!”

But the next second, the police arrived.

Wait! I’m not a pervert! I’m here to catch a monster!

In my last life, Xie Wujiu stormed the capital, and blood ran like rivers before the palace gates. In this life, before he could fall into darkness, I forced him into a private school and made him recite The Analects every day.

Only later did I understand: asking a starving person to speak of benevolence and righteousness can itself be cruel.

Chi Heng pretended to be poor and became my kept boyfriend.

Each month, I scraped together five hundred yuan from my living expenses to give him, and this went on for a year and a half.

As graduation approached, I finally found out:

He wasn’t a poor student on loans, but a young master who spent money like water.

He’d even been using someone else’s name the whole time.

The young master condescended to invite me to go abroad with him.

His friends all said I was lucky-with just a kind little white flower persona, I could climb up the social ladder.

Under his gaze, brimming with confidence that he’d get what he wanted,

I shook my head and said gently, “Better not.”

“I’m here to break up with you.”

My mom works as a housekeeper for Jiang Chuyi’s family, so I’ve lived in the Jiang Family home since I was little.

Jiang Chuyi is the model student in adults’ eyes.

Top grades, a good personality-he’s a child of heaven.

But the moment he took a knife and slit his own wrist-

I was the only one who saw it.

When the master hosts a banquet, he often has beautiful women serve wine.

If a guest refuses to drink, the beauty is executed on the spot.

Unluckily, I am that unfortunate beauty.

Tonight’s guest of honor is an aloof and distinguished scholar, Yan Xuan.

First cup: he complained the wine was cold and wouldn’t drink. A sword swung, a head fell.

Second cup: he complained the server was vulgar and wouldn’t drink. Blood splattered on the spot.

By the third cup, the serving maid pleaded pitifully, but his expression never changed.

Now it’s my turn to offer wine.

The swordsman beside me sharpened his blade ominously.

I raised my hand and splashed the wine across his face.

“Are you just asking for it?”

I was fighting someone in the street when Young Madam took a liking to me on the spot.

She gave me fifty taels of silver and asked if I was willing to become her husband’s concubine.

They say a debt of recognition should be repaid with one’s body. Fair enough.

But was this really the way to repay it?

Still, I was desperately short on silver, so I gritted my teeth and agreed.

Only after entering the manor did I learn that my husband was introverted, my mother-in-law was tyrannical, and my sister-in-law was insufferably arrogant.

Young Madam hadn’t bought me back to serve anyone at all.

She had brought me into this family to be King Yan.

My mother was a farm girl who couldn’t read a single character, yet she still supported my father all the way until he passed the provincial examination.

On the day my father married the Prime Minister’s legitimate daughter, my mother obediently became his equal wife.

My father thought my mother loved him, which made her easy to control.

My father’s principal wife thought my mother, born and raised in the countryside, could never be a match for her.

And so, beneath their contempt, my mother played the fool while hiding her claws, raising me into someone whose worth was beyond measure.

The insanely hot guy upstairs is six-two, with cool-toned fair skin and gold-rimmed glasses. He looks aloof and abstinent, but apparently, he’s actually a beast.

The very night I moved in, the upstairs unit went at it all night.

So passionate. So impressive.

It would have been even better if I hadn’t been the one suffering through it.

When they were about to start up again, I finally couldn’t take it anymore.

I opened the property management WeChat group and added the hot guy from Unit 802, Building E.

“Hi, you’re the resident of Unit 802 in Building E, right?”

“Could you two keep it down?”

“It’s so loud I can’t sleep…”

He replied, “I’m working overtime at the office.”

I shot up from my deathbed of exhaustion, suddenly smelling the scent of piping-hot gossip.

The next second, he transferred me eight hundred yuan.

Him: “Bro, help me block the door. I’ll be there right away.”

The Xie Family came to my door to break off the engagement, offering me two options.

Either the First Young Master and I dissolved our betrothal, and from then on, he and I would marry whomever we pleased, with nothing more to do with each other.

Or we changed the match: I would marry the Second Young Master instead, and I would still become a daughter-in-law of the Xie Family.

The First Young Master was a dragon among men. He had rendered great service while away on official business, and once he returned to the capital, he would be able to enter the Hanlin Academy. As an orphaned girl, my status was no longer worthy of him.

The Second Young Master was a concubine-born son of the family. Though he could not compare to his elder brother, he was still quite learned.

They were certain I would agree to the change. After all, no one could withstand the pressure of gossip and rumor-not to mention the Second Young Master was exceptionally handsome.

But what did any of that have to do with me?

I only asked calmly, “Is this the First Young Master’s wish?”

“It is! The First Young Master said that times change and circumstances shift. A clever young lady like you will surely know how to judge the situation.”

Later, I entered the palace and became a female official.

The Xie Family was about to be punished for their crimes.

The First Young Master Xie knelt outside the palace gates, begging me to pass a message inside.

My gaze fell on him without sorrow or joy, and I said mildly, “Young Master once told me to judge the situation. I have always kept that lesson close to heart and have never dared forget it.”

The day my childhood sweetheart and I had our worst fight,

he slapped me for the sake of the young woman he loved.

And I, in a fit of rage, broke three of his ribs.

He screamed that he wanted a divorce, but I refused.

I thought we would keep dragging each other down like this until the day we died.

But reality proved me wrong far too quickly.

Three months later, I fell head over heels for a sweet, innocent younger guy.

He kept chasing me for an official title.

So I had no choice but to pull that familiar number out of my blacklist.

When the call connected, the young woman’s playful voice came from the other end.

“Su Yi, you’re too late. Even if you crawl over like a dog and beg for forgiveness now, Ah Xu won’t spare you a second glance.”

Faced with her provocation, I only said calmly, “Tell Zhou Xu I want a divorce.”

The next second, the phone on the other end seemed to be snatched away. A burst of rustling static followed before Zhou Xu’s voice finally came through, trembling despite his best efforts to restrain it.

He said, “Su Yi, don’t you dare.”

I served at the Empress Dowager’s side for twenty years as her chief palace maid.

Steady, dignified, respected by all.

No one knew.

I had borne two children for the Son of Heaven.

Only on her deathbed did the Empress Dowager discover our secret affair.

She held my hand, seeming to sigh.

“Silly child. You kept this from me for so many years.”

“I will issue an imperial decree at once and have you enter the palace as a consort, so mother and children may be reunited.”

In my previous life, I truly did enter the palace.

But by then, Zhao Xun already had a Noble Consort he cherished above all else.

He favored me for a time, then cast me aside without a second thought.

Even my own children acknowledged another woman as their mother.

Now, reborn into this life,

I no longer wanted to be his consort.

Beside the Empress Dowager’s sickbed,

I kowtowed heavily. “This servant would never dare presume upon imperial favor.”

“I beg the Empress Dowager for mercy. Please allow this servant to leave the palace.”

Meng Yuanxi and I were rescued from the fire at the same time.

But after we woke, her talent shocked the world, and her policy essays stirred the hearts of all who read them.

Even my fiancé, the Crown Prince, wanted to break off our engagement for her sake.

She said that in this world, she was destined to be the winner.

But I only said lazily, “After getting the chance to do it all over again, you still haven’t improved at all…”

The year Shen Jiuyuan picked me up, I was like a stray dog.

For ten years, I took bullets for him, rooted out traitors for him, and knelt to lick the blood from his shoes.

Everyone said I was Master Shen’s most loyal dog.

Until that night, when he gripped my chin and asked, “What reward do you want?”

I kissed his bloodstained fingertips. “I want you.”

He gave a low laugh and pressed a gun into my hand. “Then kill the person behind you for me.”

I took the gun and turned around, and the mirror reflected my pale face.

My roommate was a professional bride.

She said she’d landed a big job recently, and the client was incredibly generous.

When I saw the fee wrapped in red paper, I tried to talk her out of taking it.

But on the day of the event, my roommate still snuck off.

And she never came back.

What she didn’t know was that every one of the event’s organizers…

wasn’t human.

My rich, pretty roommate had a boyfriend who was five-foot-three, weighed 187 pounds, and always had a greasy shine on his face.

She guarded against me at every turn, terrified I had designs on him.

I told her her boyfriend was a pig, and she snapped that I was just calling the grapes sour because I couldn’t have them.

But what she didn’t know was that her boyfriend really was a pig.

In the dead of night, a friend called me begging for help.

“Save me! Someone with their bones showing broke into my house!”

I cursed him for being insane and was just about to hang up.

Then he sent me the video.

In the surveillance footage, a stark-white humanoid skeleton was pacing back and forth through his living room.

My elder sister once saved Prince Cheng in Yangzhou, back when he was afflicted with muteness.

When he recovered, he personally came to our door to ask for her hand.

But by then, my elder sister was already married and had borne a child. Holding her newborn in her arms, she smiled warmly.

“I am five years older than you, and I only gave birth to this child a few days ago.”

“My younger sister, however, is only a year apart from you. Perhaps she would be a better match.”

Later, Prince Cheng truly did ask to marry me.

But after our wedding, he treated me with the utmost cruelty, forever complaining that my temperament was worlds apart from my sister’s.

“I was wrong. For the bright moon in my heart, I settled for second best and made do by marrying you.”

“And because of that, I have spent my entire life making do.”

Now that I had been reborn, it was once again the day Prince Cheng came to our door.

My elder sister was just about to bring me up.

I spoke first, smiling calmly.

“Sister, I don’t like older men either.”

To whitewash my scheming persona, I kept a respectful distance from the Best Actor on a dating variety show.

But in the livestream, the Best Actor burst into tears.

“Teacher Bai and I have a very pure relationship. Purely speaking, I’m her simp-and I can’t even get her to notice me…”

“Right now, I just miss the days when we were filming together. In the drama, Teacher Bai loved me to death. Unlike now-she won’t even acknowledge me, and she’s out here making ship content of me with other women.”

In my senior year of high school, the school beauty, Song Shuyao, once came to me to borrow money for medical treatment and asked me not to tell anyone.

As it turned out, she used it to get an abortion. She hemorrhaged and died on the operating table of a shady little clinic.

Years later, Lu Jingnian-the untouchable top student everyone had once admired from afar-pursued me obsessively and proposed to me.

Then, when I was eight months pregnant, he locked me in a basement in the suburbs.

He cut open my belly while I was still alive and said, “This is what you owe Yaoyao and our child.”

Only then did I learn that before Song Shuyao died, she had held his hand and told him not to blame me.

But he was convinced I had deliberately killed the woman he loved and their child.

That day, I died under Lu Jingnian’s butcher knife, my eyes wide open in hatred.

Then, carrying a hatred vast enough to drown the heavens, I returned to the day Song Shuyao came to borrow money from me.

Have you ever heard of the Evil Children?

While volunteering as a teacher in Shanglian Village, I saw what true Evil Children were like.

They hung bloody animal carcasses outside my door.

They led an old bachelor to my place and tried every trick they could think of to get me to open the door…

But what they didn’t know was that I was a demon subduer.

This village had been placed under the Curse of the Evil Children, and disaster was about to strike.

But now, I have no intention of saving them.

I risked my life to save the Commandery Prince and my half sister from drowning.

But because my clothes were soaked through,

they slapped me with the filthy accusation of “deliberate seduction and forcing a marriage to climb the social ladder.”

From the woman who had saved their lives, I became a scheming tramp reviled by all of the capital.

On the day of our wedding, Murong Ling did not even lift my veil. His eyes were filled with disgust.

“You used such despicable means to force me to marry you. I, the Commandery Prince, will never let you have an easy life.”

Yun’e, whom I had dragged ashore with my own hands, twisted her handkerchief, her face full of grievance.

“What a deep schemer you are, Sister. When you saved me, you were swift and decisive, yet under the water, you lingered so intimately with the Commandery Prince for so long…”

I had poured my heart out to save two lives, only to end up condemned from both sides.

I endured every torment the Commandery Prince’s Manor could throw at me.

When I opened my eyes again and saw the two of them bobbing in the river,

I neatly changed direction.

Then I strolled into town and bought a skewer of candied hawthorns.

I took a bite-

So sweet.

The school bully tormented me at school, then followed me home and, right in front of me, slammed Ah Huang, the puppy who had grown up by my side, to death.

But the bully didn’t know I was the Daughter of the Underworld King.

Seizing souls was an ability I had been born with.

The next day, the bully acted completely out of character at school. One by one, he beat up everyone who had ever picked on me.

Then he announced in front of everyone that from now on, he would protect me forever.

When no one was around, I reached up and patted his head. “Good boy, Ah Huang. This body is pretty useful, isn’t it?”

Shen Wudu and I spent seven years breaking up and getting back together.

I was in charge of breaking up. He was in charge of getting us back together.

But after the last time I said it was over, he stopped trying to win me back. Instead, he took in a lover who looked almost exactly like me.

To make her famous, he stole my resources.

The Best Actress award I had chased for ten years-he handed it to her with effortless ease.

At the awards ceremony, a reporter asked if I regretted breaking up with him.

I smiled and raised my hand, revealing the diamond ring on my finger.

“I’m getting married.”

The moment the words fell, everyone saw the coldest, proudest Young Master of the Shen Family suddenly turn red-eyed.

In the two years since my wedding, my husband had never once come home.

Lonely beyond endurance, I bought a convicted slave to warm my bed.

He was certainly diligent between the sheets, but as a person, he was far too vain.

My purse couldn’t take it, so I simply kept him on a poor man’s budget.

Unable to stomach a life of coarse tea and plain meals, he roared, “I don’t want to be your husband anymore!”

Puzzled, I said, “I’m already married. You’re just my kept man.”

His eyes went bloodshot as he gnashed his teeth. “You’re this broke, and you’re still trying to keep a lover on the side like everyone else?!”

And with that, we went our separate ways.

I packed my things and returned to the capital, where I heard that my long-missing brother-in-law had finally come back.

He was kneeling in the ancestral hall and had been given ten lashes.

My mother-in-law was so furious she cursed, “You actually fell for a married woman! Have you no shame at all?!”

I hurried forward to plead on his behalf.

To my surprise, my brother-in-law turned his head, looked at me, and slowly smiled. “Sister-in-law, have you been well?”

I was stunned.

Wasn’t this my vain, status-obsessed kept man?!

Ten years into our marriage, my husband began lavishing attention on a Transmigrator outside our home.

While the two of them were in the throes of their affair, that Transmigrator, in all her ignorance, came to make a scene before me.

“As expected of a feudal relic trapped in the inner residence until death. You think everyone is like you, unable to live without a man. You underestimated me and belittled him. Apologize.”

I sat in my warm, cushioned sedan chair, my head propped lazily on one hand, without even lifting my eyes.

“Slap her mouth. Use the roughest bamboo paddle.”

This feudal relic might not have much else, but my rank was a little higher, and my methods a little harsher.

So when they beat her, they put a little more force into it.

I wanted to stroke the aloof campus heartthrob’s…

cat.

In the middle of the night, I finally couldn’t hold back anymore and sent him a message:

[Hey, classmate, can I stroke it? Just once!]

Campus Heartthrob: [Classmate, that’s a little forward of you.]

I refused to give up.

[I’m really good with my hands. I guarantee I’ll make it comfortable! You just run one hand from head to tail, right?]

The other side went silent.

An hour later, the campus heartthrob finally replied:

[One hand won’t work.]

[You can’t get a proper grip.]

[Rules Horror + Dark Fairy Tale + Little Red Riding Hood + Smart Characters + Thriller + Ensemble Cast]

[High-IQ Unhinged Female Lead × Hell-Level Rules Horror]

No saintly nonsense! No dumbing down!

Top-tier plays from start to finish. Every Eerie Entity gets pushed past its breaking point!

–

“Are you a good person?” the System’s cold voice rang beside Wei Sen’s ear.

Wei Sen looked at the person she had just killed. The body was still warm. She couldn’t help laughing. “What do you think?”

The next second, she was thrown into a rules-horror world, and her opening difficulty was S-rank:

Instance: Dark Fairy Tale: Little Red Riding Hood.

The good news: she had bound the Protagonist Aura System. As long as she did good deeds, she could gain Merit Points and exchange them for heaven-defying abilities!

The bad news: she was born rebellious. The word “kindness” didn’t exist in her dictionary!

After my elder sister learned she was a false heiress,

she disguised herself as a man and went out drinking at a pleasure house to drown her sorrows.

Who could have known she would accidentally enter the wrong room?

There, she spent a night of passion with Zhou Huaixu, who had come to investigate a case.

Zhou Huaixu had been drugged. His mind was hazy, and he did not know who the woman from the night before had been.

He only remembered that she said she came from the Qinghe Cui Clan.

The Zhou Family was known for its upright traditions, and Zhou Huaixu soon came to propose marriage.

But by then, my elder sister had already left.

As it happened, I had gone looking for her that night and did not return to the estate until dawn.

He mistook me for my elder sister and married me.

It was not until our wedding night that he realized he had the wrong person.

Filled with regret, he blamed me. “If you hadn’t been so vague, how could I have married you?”

Zhou Huaixu treated me with the utmost coldness, yet in bed, he showed me no mercy at all.

When I cried and begged him, he only covered my face and sneered, “She would never be as frivolous and lowly as you.”

Then I was reborn on the day Zhou Huaixu came to propose.

I spoke softly. “That night, I went to bed early and never left the estate.”

I was the eldest daughter of the family-the one no one favored.

From childhood, I was taught to be composed and proper, to serve as an example for my younger siblings.

And yet my fiancé was stolen away by my seemingly innocent and adorable legitimate younger sister.

My younger brothers remembered none of the good I had done for them. They only resented me for disciplining them too strictly. Even my parents saw me as nothing more than a tool to polish the family name, wholeheartedly taking my legitimate younger sister’s side.

Faced with all this, I spread my hands and gave up. From then on, I refused to involve myself in anything happening in the manor.

I let them flounder through one petty mess after another, gradually falling apart until none of the old warmth remained. Even that innocent and adorable legitimate younger sister, once she lost my support, was no longer the treasure of their hearts.

Chapter 0

“Jiejie, I’m bored of this.” Qi Sen rolled over and got up from the sofa, chin raised as he spoke to me with an arrogant attitude.

I froze, instinctively covering the buttons of my shirt. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“It’s too late now, a taxi is too expensive,” I said, reaching for the bag tossed by the table and pulling out my phone to check the time. “You can leave tomorrow morning.”

I was dragged into a horror game instance and forced to listen to a Siren sing.

I took off my hearing aids and stared blankly at the Siren baring its fangs.

“Sorry, sorry. I may not be able to hear, but I can definitely sleep!”

After a peaceful night’s rest, I safely survived the first day.

In the middle of the second night, someone quietly put my hearing aids back on me.

But then…

“Huh? I forgot to charge my hearing aids. Good thing I brought spare batteries.”

The Siren stared at me in silence, its expression dark and sinister.

Later, a group of Sirens gathered around the side of the ship, planning to pick someone to attack.

I performed CPR while playing “Most Dazzling Ethnic Style.”

The terrifying cruise ship turned into a blistering-hot party.

That day, every Siren sang off-key…

My buddy’s older sister was an aloof, goddess-level doctor, and every time I saw her, my heart started pounding.

Then one day, while I was eating skewers at a barbecue stand, I passed out from blood loss and got rushed to the hospital in an ambulance.

After she performed hemorrhoid surgery on me, I finally found out she’d been secretly in love with me for ten whole years!

Ruan Yueying was born into the Ruan Clan of Chenliu. By all rights, she should have become the Crown Princess, but because Crown Prince Gu Ming insisted on marrying Qin Yunnong, she was made a Side Consort instead. In the Eastern Palace, she formed a brief yet precious bond with Qin Yunnong and Hu Mianmian. But after a wedding night spun out of control, and amid the pull of power, desire, and love, she was forced into the schemes of the deep palace. Hu Mianmian withered away for love. Qin Yunnong, desperate to protect her own love, grew more ruthless with every step. And through loss and revenge, Ruan Yueying rose to the position of empress. Years later, she possessed honor, children, and power, yet remained forever trapped in the waxing and waning of that moon-until, on her deathbed, she finally spoke to the emperor of the clearest hatred and deepest regret of her life.

After ten years by my side, my husband brought home a beauty and announced he would make her empress.

He said, “You have no son, but I need a crown prince.”

“What man under heaven doesn’t have three wives and four concubines?”

“When did you become so jealous, so incapable of tolerating others? You’ve changed. You’ve become hideous.”

That very night, I took my Young General with me and charged out through the city gates without looking back.

After I left, he said with red-rimmed eyes, “Ning Huan, come back.”

Of course I would come back.

Clad in the imperial yellow robes, I led three hundred thousand troops back to the capital, my loyal Young General standing at my side.

“Men, drag the Deposed Emperor and that beauty out and behead them. Hang their heads from the city walls. Let them go to hell and reflect on their disloyalty and lack of filial piety.”

When I opened my eyes, I found I had been reborn in a vocational school bathroom.

The girl who had just given birth to me was wearing a shabby cotton-padded coat. She sat on the ice-cold tile floor, staring at me in terror.

She glared at me. Then she raised her bloodstained hands and reached to strangle me.

Right on cue, the System notification rang out: “Current location: the women’s restroom on the west side of the third floor of the teaching building at Maocheng Senior Vocational Technical School. Your first mission: survive your biological mother.”

Me: ? Damn. Straight into nightmare mode.