Chapter 4

Mother stepped forward to snatch the money, but Father seized her arm.

Her eyes were scarlet and her whole body shook. “Jianjia, I already bought my ticket. I told my mother I was coming home.”

“Give me this money now, and I’ll hand you all my future wages. All right?”

“You know my mother is in poor health. I haven’t been able to give her any money all these years…”

Father’s expression softened a little.

Grandmother glared. “Who knows whether you’ve secretly sent her money before?”

“You married into the Tian family. You belong to the Tians, and so does the money you earn.”

“Your brother-in-law needs a new house. Where else will my eldest grandson live?”

My aunt smiled without warmth. “Sister-in-law, there’s no hurry to visit your family. Our house can’t wait.”

“Let us borrow the money first.”

Grandmother rolled her eyes. “Borrow? She couldn’t keep her own son alive. She owes us this money!”

Mother opened her mouth again and again, as though she had a thousand things to say.

In the end, tears streamed down her face as she looked pleadingly at Father.

He avoided her eyes. “Go next year,” he said coldly.

Next year follows next year, and there is always another next year.

Could my frail maternal grandmother wait one more?

Mother slowly lowered her eyes.

She fell from the clouds of hope like a flower withering in an instant.

No.

She was my mother. I would not let her wither.

I charged into the kitchen and picked up the heaviest cleaver.

Summoning every ounce of ferocity I possessed, I raised it at the old woman. “Give Mother back her money, or I’ll chop you up!”

She craned her neck defiantly. “You wouldn’t dare. I’m your grandmother!”

“Why wouldn’t I?” I pushed the cleaver closer. “I’m not even fourteen. I won’t go to prison for killing anyone.”

“If you don’t return it, I’ll kill you and then your grandson.”

I had Hu Mei to thank for those words. She had said them to her father while protecting her mother and brother from one of his beatings.

I borrowed them.

But at that moment, I truly did want to chop the old woman to pieces.

She feared death after all. Reluctantly, she pulled out the money and threw it on the floor, then spat on it for good measure.

Mother stood frozen.

Only when I urged her did she pick it up.

As we left my aunt’s house, I dropped the cleaver with a clang at Grandmother’s feet. She shuddered violently.

We reached the yard with her earthshaking curses behind us.

At home, Mother held me and cried. She seemed to have endless things to say, but managed only, “I’m useless. You must never do that again.”

Father stayed away all night, soothing his frightened mother.

Before dawn the next day, I rode Mother to town on my bicycle to catch the first bus to Changsha.

The world was dim. The little circle from our flashlight lit the muddy country road.

After helping load her luggage, I clung to the bus door and looked up at her.

“Mother, don’t come back this time,” I said softly.

“Don’t come back here. Go anywhere else.”