Chapter 1

When I woke, I was lying in a ravine outside the village.

A stray dog was sniffing my face with its wet nose, occasionally dripping foul-smelling saliva onto me.

I remembered this place. It was Hundred Flowers Ravine, outside the village.

Hundred Flowers Ravine. Such a lovely name.

In reality, it was where people from the surrounding villages and towns abandoned baby girls.

So many little girls had been thrown there that their resentment grew too heavy.

A wandering Taoist priest said the ravine needed a bold, forceful name to soothe their angry spirits and allow them to be reborn.

But the villagers feared those baby girls would be reborn into their own families. They refused to listen.

Instead, they chose “Hundred Flowers”—a soft name, a name unmistakably feminine.

They meant to keep those girls’ spirits from ever returning to their homes.

And so the old spirits could not get out, while new ones kept coming in.

Their numbers grew and grew in that ravine.

More and more…

I stumbled back to the village and spotted my home at once.

Mother was feeding the pigs, her belly swollen with pregnancy.

“Mother!”

I called to her and received a look of disgust.

“What are you shouting for, you little brat? Who’s your mother? This one’s going to be a boy. Don’t you put a curse on me!”

Her scolding left me bewildered. But she really was my mother!

“Mother, don’t you remember me? You gave birth to me!”

My voice was a timid murmur.

The woman I had called Mother snatched up the wooden ladle she used to feed the pigs and swung it at me.

Frightened, I ran away.

In my memories, I had more than one mother.

I soon found the second.

Strangely, this mother was pregnant too, and looked ready to give birth.

I leaned against the window and listened to Father yelling at her.

“Four girls in a row! If you can’t give me one with a pecker this time, I’ll sell you and buy another woman to bear me sons!”

Mother stood against the edge of the heated brick bed, head lowered and hands tucked away, not daring to utter a word.

Three girls crouched on the floor like little chicks. Looking closely, I could see they were trembling.

I knew them. They were my elder sisters.

Delighted, I rushed inside. “Father! Mother! Sisters! I’ve finally found my way home!”

Instead of the joyful reunion I had imagined, my sisters stared in terror, Mother looked astonished, and Father flew into a rage.

“Aren’t three money-wasters enough? Where did another one come from? You just won’t leave us alone! I should’ve fed you to the pigs!”

Clearly, I was not welcome in this home either.

So I went looking for the next one.

I visited every home I remembered. Not a single father or mother was willing to keep me.

I walked along the path in the dark. Perhaps I could only return to Hundred Flowers Ravine.

They didn’t want me. That was all right. I could live perfectly well on my own.

I made up my mind, silently, and felt the strength throughout my body grow a little greater.

As I passed the home where my three sisters lived, I heard cries of pain, one after another.

I knew that mother of mine was giving birth.

Several older women had gathered in the courtyard, whispering together.

I went closer before I could make out their words.

“The shape of her belly says it’s another girl.”

“Shh! Don’t let Wang Er hear you. He’ll come after you.”

“Poor Mrs. Wang. Who knows if she’ll even survive after this one.”

…

She was my mother. Even if she wouldn’t acknowledge me, I couldn’t stand by and let her die.

“I can make her have a son!”

I rushed into the room, shouting. The crowd inside and out all thought I was a mad little girl.

But they couldn’t stop me.

My body, that of a three- or four-year-old child, was unusually nimble. I darted between the adults.

“The baby’s head is almost out!”

At the midwife’s cry, I knew I had to hurry or it would be too late.

I made one desperate dash and flung myself onto Mother.

I stroked her belly with both hands until someone dragged me ruthlessly away.

“A boy! It’s a boy!”

The midwife’s shout sent everyone into an uproar.

“I finally have a son!”

Father fell to his knees, laughing and crying.

The women outside were astonished.

“That’s impossible. I’ve seen so many pregnant women. Hers was definitely a girl!”

“I thought it looked like a girl too.”

“But that little girl they just threw out said she could make Mrs. Wang have a son!”

“Could she really have done it?”

I heard no more of their conversation. Someone had hurled me onto the gravel path outside the door.

The sharp stones struck my palms and knees with a piercing pain.

I got up, brushed off the dirt, and limped toward the edge of the village.

Before I had gone far, I vaguely heard someone calling behind me.

“Little girl! Wait for me!”

I turned and looked at her uncertainly.

It was one of the women from the courtyard.

She hurried over and questioned me before she had even caught her breath.

“You said you could make pregnant women have sons?”

I nodded without speaking.

Her eyes lit up. She crouched down and caught my arms.

“Whose child are you?”

“I don’t have a home.”

I answered calmly.

None of my fathers or mothers wanted me. That meant I had no home, didn’t it?

To my surprise, this made her happy.

“Come home with me, then!”

Only when we reached her house did I discover another pregnant woman there, also due to give birth soon.

It looked as though she had only three or five days left.

“Can you make my daughter-in-law have a son too?”

I nodded. “Yes!”

She was delighted, but her son didn’t believe me.

“Three ultrasounds all said it’s a girl. Nothing’s going to turn it into a boy!”

So every day I touched the pregnant woman’s belly.

It was only a touch, after all. No one stopped me.

When she gave birth, she did indeed have a son.