Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Father Emperor is smiling, but I think it looks terrible-is that a hint of embarrassment?

I don’t really understand men; how can an expression be so complicated?

My Empress Mother is much better. Her smile is sincere, even with a few tears in her eyes.

She gives my little cheek a tender kiss and turns to Father Emperor.

“I misunderstood Your Majesty. What name did you have in mind?”

“Her childhood name will be Qingzhi. As for her title… how about Changle? May she have peace and joy year after year.”

I am horrified.

[Wait, am I that Princess Changle who died at twenty-three? I was careless; this is a bad reincarnation. I should just try again. If I die early and head back to the Underworld now, Yama probably won’t make me work for him again, right?]

Empress Mother thinks it’s a good name.

But Father Emperor rejects it himself.

“No, no. Changle is too common. How about Nanping? It’s grand and imposing, fitting for her status.”

I burst into tears.

[I shouldn’t have trusted this old geezer. Princess Nanping was demoted over and over again, eventually ending up in the desolate south. She even outlived two husbands! Waaaah, I want to go back to the Underworld!]

Father Emperor vetoes his own suggestion again.

“Let’s go with Sui’an. May she be safe and successful.”

I am in despair.

[Another one who lost two husbands and lived a life of total obscurity!]

Father Emperor looks pretty desperate himself.

Me: [?]

I’m the one in despair, what are you so stressed about?

You’re not the one whose husbands are going to die.

Father Emperor stares at me, muttering names incessantly.

“How about Linchuan? Yuzhang? Xincheng? Zhaohe? Chaoyang? My little ancestor, what on earth do you want to be called?”

I pout my little lips, thoroughly displeased.

[My mother carried me for ten months-it was so hard on her-and you haven’t even thought of a name for your child?]

[Being a father is way too easy for you.]

[After all that, I have to think of my own name? What use are you?]

[I might as well be called Changping! It’s a combination of Changle and Nanping. Maybe I’ll live as long as the two of them combined and make it safely to sixty.]

Father Emperor falls silent for a long time. Finally, he makes a decision.

“We shall call her Changping. Long-lasting joy, eternal peace.”

“Ningxian, rest well. I must go handle court affairs. I will come see you once I am finished.”

He leans down to kiss my mother, then comes over to kiss me.

My brow furrows so hard I could crush a fly. I scream internally.

[Did you brush your teeth? You’re just going to kiss me?]

[Don’t you know how much bacteria is in an adult’s mouth?]

[You really are trying to kill me.]

[Did Yama find out I slacked off while working for him?]

[Otherwise, why would he give me such a wonderful mother but such an unreliable father? My life is so bitter! Waaaah!]

I wail at the top of my lungs.

Father Emperor stops just before his lips touch me and beats a hasty retreat.

His hurried departure… kind of looks like a dog with its tail between its legs?

I just don’t get it!