Chapter 2

The love-gu had been gone for years.

When Mother first passed them to me, she gripped my hand and said,

“Men are faithless creatures. Only a bond of love-gu can keep a marriage loving for a lifetime.”

“If all else fails, I would rather you cut off your hair and become a nun than serve your elder sister as a concubine.”

But Mother never knew that, after her death, the love-gu nourished with blood from her heart refused another keeper. They starved to death and followed her.

At the time, I thought it was simply my fate. I lacked the ability to enjoy a better life.

I gave up any thought of approaching Li Wujin.

Then, three years ago, I saw him galloping along the avenue on a tall horse, and fell for him all the same.

A young man in splendid clothes, astride a spirited horse.

Mother really had known exactly what I liked.

There had been little fighting at the frontier these past three years. For as long as he stayed in the capital, I stayed by his side.

Li Wujin went from speaking coldly to me, to favoring me, to vowing he would marry no one else.

Last month, when I visited Mother’s grave, I even told her,

“See? Even without love-gu, Wujin and I can grow old together.”

I had opened the victory wine before the battle was won.

Mother must be furious with me now for refusing to listen.

After my break with Li Wujin, life in the Xia household grew harder.

Rumor had long said a Xia girl was chasing him. No one knew which daughter, but people laughed at the family’s delusions.

Father found it humiliating and had punished me many times for it.

Now that an imperial marriage had been granted, everyone assumed that girl had been Xia Linlang. “Delusional” became “a perfect match.”

They were the embodiment of love, indifferent to gossip and differences in birth.

Even the Noble Consort in the palace was deeply moved. She sent Xia Linlang a calligraphy scroll reading, “A Match Made in Heaven.”

For a time, Xia Linlang eclipsed everyone. Father basked in the reflected glory and stopped mentioning humiliation.

My three years had gone toward her wedding.

“Miss, a wedding robe takes such fine stitching. Mind your eyes.”

Hongyu lit another low candle and placed it before me.

Her fingers were all calluses. She could not embroider patterns, so I had to stitch my own wedding robe.

The Xia family had never assigned me maids or older servants. Hongyu was an orphan Mother had rescued. Before Mother died, she had begged Hongyu to keep me safe.

The household rarely gave me my allowance. For years, I had embroidered while Hongyu took my work to the estate to sell. We managed well enough.

Mother had practiced gu sorcery. However carefully that was concealed, whispers always got out. As her daughter, I was bound to fall under suspicion. No one would have blamed the Xias for sending me away. By keeping me, they earned Father and the mistress a reputation for generosity.

After all, gu sorcery had destroyed more than a few families in the previous dynasty.

In name, I was the Xia family’s Fourth Miss. I lived worse than other people’s maids.

For my marriage, it was a surprise they had remembered to give me red cloth for a wedding robe. I dared not dream of jewelry or a dowry.

Meanwhile, ever since the decree arrived, Xia Linlang’s courtyard had been full of visitors bringing bridal gifts.

No one felt the slightest guilt toward me.

For several days after I returned from the Li residence, I had wanted to end my life.

I was utterly exhausted, body and soul.

Then Hongyu found the rope I had hidden. She held me and wept all night.

“My poor miss. Do you think those people would regret it if you died?

“They’re longing for you to die, so everything between you and General Li can be buried with you. If you die, won’t you be giving those vicious people exactly what they want?”

At dawn, I began embroidering my wedding robe.

Hongyu was right. They wanted to drive me to my death.

I would live well, just to spite them.