Chapter 2
The year I came of age, a few young wastrels came to the capital in search of excitement.
After taking turns humiliating my father, they heard that a male courtesan and a prostitute had secretly had a daughter. They devised a filthy new amusement.
“We’ve had mothers and daughters serving the same patron before. Now I’d like to see what kind of daughter comes from a male courtesan who knows how to please better than a woman.”
Madam Lin’s eyes lit up at the money. At once she ordered people to wash and dress me.
Her smile was vicious. “After all these years of feeding you for nothing, you’re finally good for something. Prince Ning’s heir has taken a fancy to you. You’ll be off to a life of wealth!”
Father was terrified. Dragging his battered body to Lady Song, he knocked his forehead against the floor.
“The heir is cruel. Going into that household is a fate worse than death. I know you have ways, my lady. You’ve watched Xuan grow up. Please save her!”
He pulled back his sleeves, exposing the angry red rash on his arms. He smiled bitterly. “I’ve caught a filthy disease. I haven’t long to live anyway. If I can kill Prince Ning’s heir and win back a little dignity, at least I won’t have died for nothing!”
I clung to his waist, begging him again and again. “Don’t leave me! Mother is dead. I can’t lose you too…”
He pushed me away in panic. “Father’s unclean…”
But the hands beating me away finally stilled. He said softly, “You’re still young. There’s still hope for you. I’ve found you a good place with a performing troupe.”
He held a drugged handkerchief to me until I lost consciousness, then said through tears, “Even in this world, a woman with a skill can make a life for herself.”
When I opened my eyes again, Lady Song’s face was the first thing I saw.
She handed me my ownership contract, wrapped in a bundle. “Your father asked me to do this,” she said with pity.
“You and I have a bond. Though I’ve fallen into this life, my clients are men of standing. Arranging a new identity for you is no great difficulty.”
My head roared. I could not make sense of it.
We had merely been born low. Why did that make us less than other people from the start? Why was even staying alive too much to hope for?
Lady Song lowered her eyes. “They paid with flesh and blood for your chance to escape. Once you enter the troupe, forget everything about this house.”
Only then did I understand Father’s plan.
Years of poor nourishment had left him so thin that, from behind, it was almost impossible to tell us apart.
He had put on my clothes and taken my place in the carriage to Prince Ning’s residence.
Just as the heir, Shen Jue, was about to enjoy a night with the untouched entertainer of his dreams, Father snatched out the dagger hidden behind his shoe and drove it into the heir’s groin.
Drunk and taken unawares, Shen Jue was castrated.
Before he could raise a sword to hack Father to pieces, Father swallowed poison and fell smiling into a pool of blood.
The night the troupe master’s wife took me away, men from Prince Ning’s household stormed into Rouge House.
Before Madam Lin could gather her silver and flee, an armed guard slit her throat with a single stroke.
When I heard Father was dead, I wept quietly in the ox cart.
The troupe master’s wife looked coolly at me and patted my back. “A quick death without much suffering was already a mercy.”
Father had used Prince Ning’s hand to avenge Madam Lin’s years of abuse.
I swallowed my tears. “Now that I’ve joined the Hundred Arts Troupe, I won’t disappoint you or the master,” I said hoarsely.
She nodded in satisfaction. “With sense like that, you can survive in the Hundred Arts Troupe.”
The carriage moved slowly through the night.
Its wooden wheels made a dull rumble on the muddy road.
I forced myself to think clearly.
Stay alive.
Those words were carved into my very bones.
But what I thought was an escape from death—
Was merely a step from one den of monsters into another.