chapter 4

Song Ruoyun came in a moment later. The moment she laid eyes on me, she twisted the handkerchief in her hands and said, as if offended on my behalf: “Sister ran off in a sulk yesterday without a word. You don’t know how worried Father, Mother, and Brother were. If Aunt hadn’t sent word home, they would have searched for you all night.”

“Today, the moment Brother learned you’d left the Prince’s mansion, he came straight over. Sister, no matter what happens, our family matters should be settled behind closed doors. Don’t run off again and let others make a spectacle of us.”

My gaze flickered, turning to her.

Song Ruoyun rarely lost her temper. With me, she was always humble, as though constantly ashamed of her false identity.

Whenever my parents or brother scolded me, she always spoke up for me.

She was gentle and serene, and she guided me in music, chess, calligraphy, and painting.

At first, I had felt close to her.

Everyone believed I had suffered outside, but I never thought my years with Mama were a misfortune. And so I never resented this false young lady who had taken my place.

When I was punished to kneel because of her, and felt dislike rising in my heart, I even scorned myself for such dark thoughts.

It was only later that I learned there is a word for people like her: a honeyed tongue hiding a dagger.

Song Ruoyun met my gaze and widened her eyes slightly. “Is Sister still angry with me? I explained it to Father and Mother — I slipped on my own. It had nothing to do with Sister…”

Song Lan spoke. “Enough.”

Song Ruoyun pressed her lips together and fell silent.

Song Lan reached out his hand to me. “You’ve had your tantrum and let out your temper. Come home with your brother.”

He had always been hard and rigid, never making a single misstep, and never tolerating foolishness from those around him.

I looked at his outstretched palm, then took a step back, to Ji Wenli’s side.

“No.”

Song Lan frowned. “You did wrong first, then threw a fit on top of it. Do you want Father and Mother to come and beg you back?”

The look he gave me was tinged with disappointment.

If this had been the old me, I would have worried and agonized over having done wrong again.

But now, there was no ripple in my heart.

“You people cannot tell right from wrong and only listen to what you want to hear,” I said. “I don’t want to go back and be punished by you. From beginning to end, I did nothing wrong.”

Song Lan pressed his temples. “Are you saying that I and Father and Mother have all wronged you?”

“Yes.”

“Was it not you who stole Ruoyun’s hairpin?”

“It wasn’t me.”

“Was it not you who shredded Ruoyun’s books of poems?”

“It wasn’t me.”

“…Witnesses and evidence all point to you. Are you saying she deliberately framed you?”

“Yes.”

Song Ruoyun’s face shifted slightly, and she tugged at Song Lan’s sleeve. “Brother…”

Song Lan did not look at her. “Words alone prove nothing. Who would believe you? If a few simple sentences from you could make us ignore the evidence, then where would justice be?”

Seeing him put on such a righteous air, I felt powerless all over again.

“Then in your eyes, why would I keep trying again and again to frame her, always failing?”

Song Lan pressed his lips together. “You resent her for occupying your identity for more than a decade, so you wanted to vent your anger…”

I countered: “That’s your guess. By the same logic, I could guess that she enjoyed the status of the Prime Minister’s eldest daughter for more than a decade, and feared that my return would threaten her position. So she schemed against me again and again, and drove a wedge between me and all of you. Isn’t that just as possible?”

Song Lan denied it almost without thinking. “Ruoyun is not that kind of person.”

The moment the words left his mouth, joy flickered across Song Ruoyun’s face, while Song Lan froze, then looked at me in a slight panic.

I was not surprised. “Yes. It’s not just you. Everyone in the mansion believes she isn’t that kind of person, while I, the young lady who came back midway through her childhood, am the more likely to be of low character.”

“Zhenzhen, your brother didn’t mean it like that…”

I stopped listening to his excuses.

I lowered my eyes and said softly:

“I don’t want the justice you would hand me. I only want to leave you all.”