Chapter 4

Chapter 4

To Old Madam, that marriage had been a beautiful memory from long ago. The yellowed pages of that book began with the wondrous fate that brought the two of them together.

But after a mere dozen years or so, it stopped at the moment the general died on the battlefield.

She had still been young then, only in her thirties, with two sons under her care, both of whom she had raised and taught well.

The old momo in the household said that after Old Madam learned of the general’s death, she wept for days and nights, wasting away until she could not even eat.

The two young masters endured the pain of losing their father and took turns caring for her. Only then did she force herself to rally a little.

“At that time, Old Madam asked only one question. She asked, ‘Will both my boys have to go to war too?’ When she saw that neither of them answered, she never said another word.”

The old momo sighed deeply. She was the same age as Old Madam, yet her own hair was only dusted with gray, while Old Madam’s had gone completely white.

“Overnight, Old Madam became a different person. Before that, what she hated most was dealing with household affairs and accounts, all those trivial matters. Afterward, she did everything herself, every bit the head of the family, so the children could focus on leading troops and fighting battles without worry. She would never let the dignity of the General’s Mansion collapse.”

The plaque of the First-Rank Zhengyi General hung high above the mansion gates, and the woman who had once known no sorrow lost her smile.

The one who sat solemn and upright was the general’s widow, the titled lady who held up that vast estate.

She understood all too well the pain of losing someone so suddenly.

That was why she often advised Young Madam to keep her mind calm and nurture her nature, not to spend too much of her heart on Young General.

“A person must not be too carefree in youth. Otherwise, when the branch they depend on snaps, it will feel as though the sky itself has fallen.” Old Madam had only ever said those words in front of us first-rank maids.

Donggui said, “Young Madam is intelligent. If Old Madam were to tell her, she would understand with only a hint.”

Old Madam thought for a long while, then slowly shook her head.

“At first, she was unwilling to marry because she did not want to marry a military man. Now that she was willing, how could she not understand this?”

Old Madam was kindhearted, and kindhearted people always noticed the subtle things others failed to see.

So that long sigh of hers made my heart ache.

She went on sadly, her voice trembling, “Such long years ahead, and this courtyard full of pitiful women waiting for men who may never return. How old is she this year? How is she supposed to walk the road ahead of her…”

In that instant, Old Madam’s brows sagged and her eyes looked sunken. “Did I do wrong? Should I never have dragged in a girl another family raised so well…?”

The autumn wind stilled, and time fell silent.

All at once, I thought of First Madam, who had entered religious life, and Second Madam, who had gone far away from the capital.

That year, the two generals had split their forces. One went to pacify the rebellion on the western frontier; the other headed south to suppress bandits.

The one who went west came back wrapped in horsehide, his face torn by wild wolves, so disfigured when he was returned to the imperial capital that even his closest kin could scarcely recognize him. The one who suppressed the bandits died pierced by ten thousand arrows, still wearing his bright-red wedding robes beneath his armor.

The one who went west was the eldest son. He left behind a child of two years old, who would later become Young General.

The one who went to suppress the bandits was the second son. He had just turned twenty-one that year and had only just married the girl he had longed for day and night, only to receive orders and march out on his wedding night.

Both madams had been so young. When they lost their husbands, neither was even twenty.

Out of kindness, Old Madam allowed them to remarry as they pleased, saying the General’s Mansion would never detain anyone.

But their broken hearts had been left within these high walls and deep courtyards. The moment the two madams stepped out of the General’s Mansion, one entered the Buddhist gate, and the other left the imperial capital. Neither was willing to have anything more to do with this place of heartbreak.

First Madam entrusted her young son to Old Madam. The old momo said that that night, the two of them shut the doors tight and held the little child between them. No one knew what they said.

All anyone knew was that Old Madam’s hair turned white overnight. After seeing First Madam off, she collapsed into illness and lay in bed for more than a month.

What more could they have said? One had lost a husband, the other a son. Both had tears in their eyes and blood in their hearts.

His Majesty, mindful of the dwindling descendants of the General’s Mansion, specially permitted Young General to wait until a year after his marriage before leading troops into battle.

Now Young General and Young Madam had been married for nearly a year. Though no one said it aloud, no one could let it go in their hearts.

But the old momo was getting on in years and had grown muddled. Right in front of Old Madam, as she picked through colored cords, she said, “Could there be some evil wind in our courtyard? How is it that perfectly good young men all end up fighting each other to go off to war? In the end, not a single one…”

Donggui signaled to me with her eyes. She offered tea to the old momo, while I snatched the colored cords from the old momo’s hands and hurriedly said, “Making knot ornaments is the sort of work that strains the eyes most. You should have told us to do it earlier.”

Old Madam kept her head lowered, looking at the scroll of Buddhist scripture in her hands. She said nothing, but I knew she had heard.

She had never been one to make things difficult for servants, especially not an elder like the old momo, who had been by her side since they were young.

So after we persuaded the old momo to leave and the atmosphere sank into gloom for a while, Old Madam smiled and spoke. “Listen to the things she says. Isn’t it infuriating? She married the old accountant herself and has children and grandchildren all around her. Now she comes showing off in front of me. You girls have always had ideas. Hurry and think of a way to help me deal with her.”

At that, we laughed along with her.

I was just thinking of saying a few pleasing words to help Old Madam feel at ease, when unexpectedly, Young Madam walked in and immediately asked for someone.

“Grandmother’s courtyard has so many delightful people. Even when I sit in the West Courtyard, I can hear bursts of laughter from here,” she said, half crouching beside Old Madam as she massaged Old Madam’s legs. “If Grandmother loves me, then let me choose one to keep me company, all right?”

Old Madam naturally agreed. At once, I had a bad feeling. Yiyu also lifted her head and glanced at me, her eyes full of worry.

To my surprise, Young Madam extended one slender finger, and sure enough, she pointed at me.

What surprised me even more was that she did not merely want me to serve her. Instead-

“I know the one Old Madam dotes on most is this Miss Nianfeng, so of course I would never dare slight her. We must have Young General take her into his rooms.”