Marriage
A Few Matters at the Princess Fengguo’s Mansion
My father rebelled, and I became the most honored legitimate princess.
No, wait-the Grand Tutor said it’s not rebellion.
How can it be rebellion when it’s the act of a founding emperor?
It was the descent of the Imperial Star, the gods and buddhas blessing the people, rescuing the masses from misery!
As the Grand Tutor taught, one should say:
The previous dynasty was tyrannical and unjust, the common people were in a living hell, suffering unbearably. My father the Emperor led a group of righteous men in uprising, successfully ended the chaotic times, and established the Great An Dynasty.
So I, an ordinary farmer’s wife in the previous dynasty, inexplicably became the one and only legitimate princess of the An Dynasty.
That’s right, I’m married, my husband is alive and well, I have both a son and a daughter, my life is happy and fulfilling, and for years I’ve topped the list of happiest young wives in the village.
Before becoming a princess, my biggest worry was that my son didn’t like meat and only ate vegetables, while my daughter didn’t like vegetables and only ate meat.
Now my biggest worry has become: being a legitimate princess and all that-I have no experience with it…
More Beast Husbands, Please!
I was just about to tell my beastman husband that my sight had returned when I overheard his younger brother trying to persuade him.
“Shi Zhou, you may have lost your memory, but Yue Wei was your fiancée.”
“She’s badly injured now, and only your S-rank healing power can save her.”
“Are you really going to stand by and let her die?”
“If you can’t bear to leave that little blind girl of yours alone, I’ll take your place for a while.”
“She can’t see anyway.”
In the end, Shi Zhou gave in.
“All right.”
The live comments erupted with excitement.
[The strictest dad in the entire shipping fandom has arrived. Who else understands the noble sacrifice of a tsundere little brother offering himself up to the cannon fodder for the sake of his brother and sister-in-law’s true love?]
[Little brother: This family would fall apart without me.]
I raised my head and looked over, my heart skipping a beat.
Before me stood an upgraded version of Shi Ye-taller, broader, younger-looking, devastatingly handsome, and with an even straighter nose.
After Shi Zhou left, I felt my way over and wrapped my arms around Shi Ye’s waist from behind.
“Honey, you feel so different today.”
“Why are you suddenly hanging to the left?”
“Is something bothering you?”
The Perfect Husband
My husband could not father children, but he was so kind and capable that he brought home another man for me.
“He is an outsider, and a handsome one at that; once he gets you pregnant, we will simply throw him out.”
We pretended to be brother and sister and carried out our plan.
To our surprise, the man proved practically saintly: he not only left me with a child, but also paid me a fortune before he departed.
“A rustic village woman is no match for me, so do not pester me again.”
My husband was so furious that he tried to fight him, and I tearfully held him back.
“Brother, let it go—do not hurt him.”
Then I turned and whispered to my husband, “A gigolo who works for free and pays us on top of it is hard to find these days, so just play along.”
Together, we saw our generous benefactor off, used his money to buy land and open a clinic, had a son, and lived very comfortably indeed.
Three years later, the Crown Prince returned to the place where it had all begun and found the three of us together.
He went mad on the spot.
“Some brother and sister you are—you made a complete fool of me!”
My Brother Became a Live-in Son-in-Law
My older brother was eighteen when he was married off as a live-in son-in-law to my sister-in-law.
My sister-in-law said that if he gave her a child, she’d reward him by letting him continue his studies.
Later, the day my brother passed the imperial exam, Father still refused to give up and asked,
“Son, now can my grandson change his surname back to mine?”
The Oath of a Lifetime
After ten years by my side, my husband brought home a beauty and announced he would make her empress.
He said, “You have no son, but I need a crown prince.”
“What man under heaven doesn’t have three wives and four concubines?”
“When did you become so jealous, so incapable of tolerating others? You’ve changed. You’ve become hideous.”
That very night, I took my Young General with me and charged out through the city gates without looking back.
After I left, he said with red-rimmed eyes, “Ning Huan, come back.”
Of course I would come back.
Clad in the imperial yellow robes, I led three hundred thousand troops back to the capital, my loyal Young General standing at my side.
“Men, drag the Deposed Emperor and that beauty out and behead them. Hang their heads from the city walls. Let them go to hell and reflect on their disloyalty and lack of filial piety.”
The Kite That Tied Our Fates
The Empress had devised an elegant diversion: if a prince shot down a kite bearing a noblewoman’s name, he could choose her as his consort.
I made a point of running over to remind the Third Prince.
“That huge red butterfly kite is mine.
Don’t mix it up with the others later.”
He grinned and teased me.
“Are you that eager to marry me?”
“Fine.
I’ll think about it.
If I can’t hit anyone else’s, I’ll shoot yours.”
I flushed and spat at him in mock disgust.
“Plenty of men want to marry me.
I’m only afraid you’ll fail to win me and start bawling.”
Pei Qing and I had grown up together, bickering and playing since childhood.
It was the most ordinary kind of banter between us, but I knew he would take my words to heart.
Yet once the contest began, Pei Qing kept aiming at my elder sister’s kite without so much as glancing at mine.
My kite was so conspicuous.
He could not possibly have missed it.
I watched several arrows skim past it.
I grew anxious that someone else might shoot it down.
I had no choice but to let it climb higher and higher, beyond everyone’s reach.
Then, without warning, the string in my hand snapped.
The kite swayed as it fell—and landed on the Crown Prince, who had set his heart on renouncing the world for a Buddhist monastery.
Shao Wei
On April 27th, Shen Yichuan wished me a happy birthday.
I was silent for two seconds and nodded.
“I agree to the divorce.”
An awkward look crossed Shen Yichuan’s face.
“That’s not what I meant…”
He paused. “At least not today.”
I just said, “Mm.”
“Then take it as my return gift for your birthday.”
Why Does Lord Li Have Two Faces?
In my dreams, I kept giving myself over to wild passion with a man.
One day, I finally saw his face.
It was Li Jici, the icy Chief Justice of the Court of Judicial Review, a man said to have no interest in women.
When my brother is falsely accused, Li Jici mocks me for begging him for help—yet that very night, the man in my dreams is more passionate than ever.
Only after a drunken guest reveals the peach-shaped birthmark on Li Jici’s chest do I realize the truth: the beautiful dreams we have shared belong to both of us.
Unwilling to Meet Again
I knew nothing of the zither, chess, calligraphy, or painting.
Before I married Yu Huaiqian, the matchmaker asked me what I was good at.
I thought for a long while, then said,
“Picking rice.”
The whole room burst into laughter.
Yu Huaiqian laughed too, but there was no mockery in it.
He said, “Being able to pick rice is quite good. A household still has to eat.”
He was a famously refined young gentleman of the capital.
Everyone thought he should have married that childhood sweetheart of his, the one who could compose lyrics.
But he married me.
After the wedding, we each did our part and supported each other.
I asked him if he ever found me dull.
He placed a chopstickful of greens into my bowl. “Dull is good. I’ve heard enough of all that outside.”
I remembered those words for a very long time.
Until his childhood sweetheart broke off her engagement and returned to the capital.
At the Qushui Banquet, she casually recited a single line from a new lyric.
The wine cup in Yu Huaiqian’s hand froze in midair.
After the banquet ended, he sat in the study and filled an entire page with that one line.
I picked up the paper and looked at him. He immediately reached out to snatch it away.
“Don’t look.”
I asked, “Is it so good that I can’t see it?”
He was silent for a moment, then his voice lowered.
“You wouldn’t understand anyway. Why insist on asking?”
I Don’t Want to Be Famous on a Supernatural Variety Show Either
Five years into my career, people called me pale, skinny, young-looking, and a fake-innocent schemer.
Meanwhile, my stunt double used me as a stepping stone to climb her way up, becoming wildly popular with an occult persona.
On shows, she told fortunes for celebrities, saying she had learned it from her boyfriend.
That boyfriend she kept talking about was the eldest son of a famous Occult Family.
But when she and I ended up on the same paranormal variety show, her talismans suddenly stopped working.
As for me, right in front of an audience of tens of millions, I took down a whole pack of ghosts with my bare hands.
“You want to be my nephew’s wife? Did you get my permission first?”