Comedy

My brother went on a trip with a few friends.

Mom told me to video-call him and check in.

The call connected, and the screen filled with a man’s bare upper body, his pecs on full display.

He rubbed his hair with a towel and said casually, as if it were the most natural thing in the world,

“Your brother’s taking a shower in the room next door. His charging cable broke, so his phone’s charging over here with me.”

I stared at the image on the screen, unable to snap out of it for a long moment.

Then that fair, handsome face suddenly leaned closer to the camera, a wicked smile curving his lips.

“Am I that good-looking? Want to see for yourself in person sometime?”

Encounter a Ghost Knock at night? Don’t be afraid – call your neighbor out to collect a ‘lunch box’ (a euphemism for death).

Meet a Fierce Ghost demanding ‘death money’ at a crossroads? Just toss the money into the Buddha’s Merit Box.

The Ghost King disguises himself as a deliveryman to kill at random – but the delivery’s destination turns out to be an Ancestor’s secluded retreat on Mount Longhu.

Li Yi, transported to a supernatural world, awakens the Anti-Cliché Celestial Master Livestream System. From then on, the world gains a Celestial Master with an unusually quirky mind and shockingly ruthless methods.

Ever since Huo Yu married me,

his son has been making a fuss nonstop.

“Bad Woman won’t let me eat!”

“She won’t let the butler tell me bedtime stories!”

“Daddy, she bullies me every day, wuwuwu…”

Huo Yu was used to his son’s unreasonable tantrums and didn’t pay much attention.

Until one day, he suddenly realized it had been half a month since he last received a complaint call.

Huo Yu found it rather odd.

After finishing work that evening, he took the initiative to call his son to coax him to sleep.

Unexpectedly, his usually clingy son seemed uninterested.

“Daddy, go to bed early. There’s a ton of stuff to do at kindergarten tomorrow.”

Huo Yu:?

(A completely brainless, silly story)

Yun Youyou opened her eyes and found that she had inexplicably become an NPC in a Horror Game.

The stingy Game: No salary, no benefits-as long as it doesn’t kill you, work until you drop.

Yun Youyou: “Then I’ll just have to pretend I’m a pile of crap.”

As long as I don’t create any value, it’s the same as not working.

Relying on nothing but her silver tongue, Yun Youyou forcibly turned the Horror Game into a comedy game.

The Horror Hotel Dungeon?

Change it! Change it into a Pool Cyber Chanting Party!

The Horror Doctor loves performing sterilization surgeries?

Change it! Change it into a Gentle Nurse who cures all ailments!

In the beginning.

Facing the most terrifying and brutal Player in the Game.

Yun Youyou clung to Ji Lin’s leg, weeping bitterly as she cried, “Please let me go! I’m not like the other ghosts!”

Ji Lin sneered, “How are you different?”

Yun Youyou sniffled, “I have no dignity.”

Ji Lin: “…”

Later on.

“Yun Youyou, come here and tell me-why does this Male Ghost have your contact information?”

Ji Lin’s eyes were cold and sharp, his voice carrying a hint of danger.

Yun Youyou, whose wings had grown strong: “I’m the queen; if you don’t like it, deal with it.”

Pei Ling’an said he wanted to break off our engagement again.

This time, it was because I refused to give the golden hairpin I had won for my poetry to my younger cousin.

“The Shen Family has fallen. No matter which daughter I choose to marry, Shen Tongzhi wouldn’t dare say a single word against it.”

He rested his chin on his hand, looking at me with a faint, mocking smile. “Break the engagement, or give the hairpin to Yuchi. Shen Yusu, the choice is yours.”

Everyone was waiting for me to bow my head.

Just as I had done countless times before.

But this time, I only tightened my grip on the golden hairpin and said softly,

“Then let’s break the engagement.”

“Sis, you can have the female lead role!”

At the wedding venue, I clutched the hand of the male lead’s unattainable first love, sobbing my heart out.

“Whoever wants it can take it. I sure don’t!”

After transmigrating into a docile-wife romance and learning that I was expected to give the male lead eighteen children, I immediately started looking for someone to take my place.

Who would’ve thought that the frail first love, who’d always seemed one breath away from death, would sit bolt upright from her sickbed and cry: “If you don’t want it, then I don’t want it either!”

As if by tacit agreement, our gazes both turned toward the trembling third female lead.

I am a Jiangshi.

My bones have hung on an ancient tree in the wilderness for over two hundred years, absorbing all the Moon Yin Energy.

The Night Patrolling Deity said that if I endured until the thirteenth day of the fifth month in the Ji-Mao year, my Cultivation would reach Indestructible Bone, and I could become a Spirit Monster, free from the Heavenly Dao Reincarnation.

I was quite pleased with myself, already pondering which spot in the mountains I should choose for a Cave Abode to become the Deer Cottage Immortal.

But then, a Flower Picking Scholar returning home for a funeral passed through the wilderness and ordered my bones to be taken down from the tree and buried in a pit.

He buried me…

Buried me…

Damn him, he’s dead for sure!

After I entered the horror game, my severe nearsightedness made everything blurry.

I treated the Blood-Dress Ghost Loli as my own daughter, cherished the Big Boss as my husband, and honored the Old Weirdness as my parents.

The first time we met, I grabbed the Big Boss’s abs and exclaimed:

“Great physique, but it’s a pity you’re a bit short.”

The Big Boss laughed angrily, reattached the severed head to his neck, and ground his teeth:

“I’m 1.86 meters tall. Take another look now?”

I am a newly appointed NPC in a horror instance.

On the third night after successfully starting work as a Maid in the Ancient Castle,

I sneaked into the room of the instance Boss with a little tail trailing behind me.

The Vampire Boss, who had been waiting for a long time, had his shirt collar wide open, faintly revealing the metallic sheen of a chain underneath.

I raised my hand to cup his handsome face as he tried to lean in and kiss me, but I only rubbed noses with him affectionately:

“Darling, our secret has been discovered.”

“If you want a reward, you’ll have to deal with those rats first.”

The day before my engagement to Zhou Yanchen, the Crown Prince of the Jing Circle, my sister was reborn.

She cried and begged our Parents to call off the engagement.

Just as I was about to ask what was going on, a Danmaku suddenly flashed before my eyes:

[Wait, why did the Female Lead get reborn? Author, come out and explain, is this right?]

[This is supposed to be a Yandere forced love story where she runs and he chases! If the Female Lead doesn’t marry him, what am I supposed to read?]

[Calm down, everyone upstairs. Actually, having a second chance isn’t so bad. The Female Lead loves her freedom. Imagine a life where you can only eat ingredients flown in by air, only wear custom-made clothes, and even the brands of daily necessities are controlled by the Male Lead. From then on, there would never be another peaceful, carefree day. She doesn’t want that!]

My eyes lit up, and I volunteered on the spot.

I’m willing! I’m willing!