Chapter 2

Chapter 2

When Song Shuyao messaged me, I was still in class.

Our high school was a century-old institution, as well as a top-tier model high school, so the teachers were strict. Most of the time, there was basically no chance to use our phones.

Only a handful of students secretly brought theirs back to the dorms and played with them after evening self-study ended.

Because she had been reaching out to me a lot lately, telling me she hadn’t been feeling well, I had kept urging her to see a doctor.

Afraid I would miss her message, I only bought a piece of bread at noon today before rushing back to the dorm. Maybe my blood sugar was low, because I felt dizzy and disoriented for a long while before I finally recovered.

When I opened my eyes, everything from my previous life came flooding back.

A tidal wave of hatred swallowed me in an instant.

Even the hand holding my phone was trembling.

In the chat window, the exact same message from my previous life appeared: “Yuanyuan, I’m sorry. I really don’t have any other choice. I’m a little sick and need at least five thousand yuan, but I only have a little over two thousand on me. Can you lend me some? I promise I’ll pay you back.”

In my previous life, I asked her what illness she had.

Embarrassed and angry, she replied, “Are you scared I won’t pay you back?”

Song Shuyao and I had known each other since we were little. When it came to manipulating me, she had always been effortlessly skilled.

Just that one sentence pushed me into the trap of proving myself. Back then, in my mind, she was my best friend.

How could I let her think that of me? Maybe she simply didn’t want anyone to know her private business.

At the time, I was still a student. After saving up more than two years of allowance, I only had around two thousand yuan. I was still short by a thousand, and my living expenses were only eight hundred a month.

I lent her twenty-five hundred, but she said it still wasn’t enough and told me to think of another way.

So I had no choice but to ask my dormmates to pool some money together. In the end, I scraped together another five hundred for her.

Because of that, for the next two months, in order to pay back what I owed, I survived on Old Beijing instant noodles that cost one and a half yuan for two packs.

Later, I never got news that Song Shuyao had recovered. In fact, after I lent her the money, I never managed to contact her again.

It wasn’t until after the college entrance exam that, by chance, I heard my mother mention it. She said Song Shuyao had hemorrhaged to death during an abortion at a small clinic.

At the time, it was like a bolt from the blue.

I had the biggest fight I’d ever had with my mother. I asked why she hadn’t told me.

She calmly accepted my outburst and said, “What would telling you have changed? Didn’t you need to take the college entrance exam? I told you before that the two of you weren’t suited to be friends. And Cheng Yuan, I hope you understand this: you cannot interfere with anyone else’s fate.”

After that, I sank into endless self-blame. I kept thinking that if I had been a little more attentive, if I had asked a few more questions, would Song Shuyao not have died?

Before I married Lu Jingnian, I once opened myself up and told him about that past.

At the time, he held me tightly in his arms, and I couldn’t see his expression.

But his tears fell onto my neck. I was moved beyond words then, thinking I had finally found my soulmate.

He understood everything about me. He even hurt with my pain.

When he cried, was he wondering whether what I said was true or false? Or was he shedding excited tears because his revenge had just taken another step closer?