Chapter 1
The lights snapped back on. I touched my swollen lips, my mind completely blank.
Only moments ago, someone had pinned me to the table and kissed me by force. Her kiss had been fierce and possessive, leaving me floundering like a drowning fish.
The room had been pitch-black, though. I hadn’t seen her face.
I drew a deep breath and forced myself to calm down. Who was most likely to have kissed me?
There were only four of us in the room. The roommate closest to me was Jiang Zhi. She was famously aloof—the department’s resident ice queen, who had turned down an upperclassman’s confession on the very first day of military training.
Jiang Zhi and I barely knew each other. The chance that she had forced a kiss on me was practically zero.
Then was it our dorm leader, Xia Qing? I shook my head. That seemed unlikely too.
Xia Qing had told me on her first day in the dorm that she was a lesbian and only liked women. But she had been sitting farthest from me. There was no way she could have kissed me and returned to her seat so quickly.
That left Lin Wanwan, who had been sitting on my right.
I studied her suspiciously. Her lips really did look a little red.
“That scared me to death. Why did the power suddenly go out?” Lin Wanwan patted her chest, looking thoroughly shaken.
“It’s all right. Just a false alarm,” Xia Qing soothed her gently.
Perhaps she noticed me staring, because Lin Wanwan suddenly leaned close.
“Shuyi, what’s wrong? Why is your forehead covered in sweat?”
“Huh?”
Her abrupt closeness made me nervous. I gripped the edge of the table and swallowed.
“Don’t move.”
Lin Wanwan pulled out a tissue and delicately wiped my forehead. As her hand withdrew, her fingertip brushed my lips. I couldn’t tell whether she’d done it on purpose.
Could it have been her? Had she been the one who kissed me?
But Lin Wanwan seemed to have a boyfriend. Just yesterday, I’d overheard them on the phone, talking with unmistakable intimacy.
My thoughts were in such a mess that I barely paid attention to the rest of the game.
The moment we returned to the dorm, Lin Wanwan urged me, “Shuyi, what are you daydreaming about? Grab your things. Let’s go.”
I checked my phone. It was already nine.
Every night at nine, Lin Wanwan and I went upstairs to shower together. It had become a habit. But if she was the person who’d kissed me, there was no way I could go with her tonight.
The showers at Beifang University were basically a communal bathhouse, with several people washing in the same room. If I stripped naked in front of her, wouldn’t I be walking straight into the lion’s den?
I slipped my arm out of hers and looked away.
“I… just remembered I have something to do. You go without me.”
“All right.” Lin Wanwan pouted in disappointment, picked up her things, and left.
I let out a breath of relief—only to look up and meet Xia Qing’s gaze.
She wore a knowing smile, amusement glinting in her eyes as though she’d seen right through me.
My whole body stiffened. I hurriedly looked away.
I didn’t sleep a wink that night. The next morning, I went to class with two enormous dark circles under my eyes.
At lunch, Lin Wanwan answered a video call from the guy who was always calling her. After she hung up, I seized my chance.
“Wanwan, was that your boyfriend?”
“Why do you ask?” She froze, looking at me in surprise.
“No reason. I just thought he was pretty handsome. He looks like a celebrity I used to have a crush on.”
I made up the excuse on the spot. Lin Wanwan hesitated for a few seconds before answering.
“He’s my boyfriend.”
She emphasized those last three words as though staking a claim.
I nearly jumped for joy. Wonderful! She was straight, which meant she couldn’t have been the person who kissed me last night.
Our pure and innocent friendship was safe from turning into romance.
Of the four people in our dorm, Lin Wanwan and I were the closest. Jiang Zhi kept everyone at a cool distance, while Xia Qing… For certain reasons, I didn’t dare get too close to her.
My delight lasted only a moment before Lin Wanwan’s ominously quiet voice reached my ears.
“Shuyi, you don’t have a thing for him, do you?”
“Cough—!”
The question startled me so badly that I almost sprayed my food across the table. A fish bone jabbed deep into my cheek, and I cried out in pain.
“Are you all right?”
Lin Wanwan and Xia Qing both leaped to their feet, staring at me in alarm.
“I’m… f-fine.”
The bone must have lodged too deeply. Several mouthfuls of water failed to wash it down.
“Open your mouth.”
Jiang Zhi, who was sitting beside me, caught my chin between her fingers. Her cool voice held the weight of an order.
“Wider.”
She slipped a finger into my mouth. Her cold fingertip brushed my tongue, sending a shudder through me. I stared at her in disbelief.
Didn’t Jiang Zhi have a thing about cleanliness? How could she…?
“Can you see it? Should I do it?” Xia Qing asked anxiously.
“Got it.”
Jiang Zhi pulled out the fish bone. I glanced at her hand and flushed with embarrassment.
“Thank you.”
I hurriedly offered her a tissue.
Jiang Zhi remained perfectly composed, which only made my wandering thoughts feel filthier.
The entire meal left me on edge.
On the way back to the dorm, I was distracted. With Lin Wanwan eliminated, only Jiang Zhi and Xia Qing remained.
Jiang Zhi? No, no. She seemed like a cloud high above a mountain peak, utterly beyond my reach. I didn’t even dare entertain the possibility.
So it had to be Xia Qing.
After all, it wouldn’t have been the first time she’d kissed me.
At the beginning of the semester, a guy from the neighboring department had been crazy about Xia Qing. Even after she rejected him several times, he refused to give up. Flowers, breakfast—he brought her something every day without fail.
One day, while delivering books to a professor, I passed the building’s pantry and heard Xia Qing’s voice. Through the crack in the door, I saw her arguing with the guy. Xia Qing, usually as gentle as water, had actually lost her temper.
“Yang Xu, I’m a lesbian. I only like women!”
“Stop bothering me. I’m not interested in you now, and I never will be.”
Yang Xu hung his head. He tried to take her hand, but Xia Qing flung him off.
“Qingqing, stop lying to me. I know girls only claim to be lesbians when they want to reject a guy.”
Xia Qing frowned in disgust. Then she suddenly glanced toward the door.
“Who’s there?”
I was about to sneak away when the door flew open.
“Ah Yi?” Xia Qing raised an eyebrow at me.
“I…”
I pressed my lips together, mortified and unable to explain.
“Help me,” she whispered in my ear.
Before I could react, she dragged me in front of Yang Xu as easily as if she were carrying a chick.
“Baby, why did you run away?”
Her voice turned intimate. Under Yang Xu’s stunned gaze, she bent down and kissed me.
“You… you two…” Yang Xu’s eyes bulged as he pointed a trembling finger at us.
“That’s right. We’re together.” Xia Qing shrugged and looped an arm around my shoulders with easy affection.
I stood rigid beside her, as wooden as a post.
“This is moral decay!”
Yang Xu’s face turned scarlet. He stormed away.
I turned, ready to demand why Xia Qing had done that to me, only to find myself caught in her warm, indulgent gaze.
“Sorry, Ah Yi. Maybe don’t eavesdrop next time, hmm?” She winked.
Guilt prickled through me.
And then…
I fled like a complete coward.
Looking back, Xia Qing was by far the likeliest suspect.
I was so lost in thought that I missed a step. My body tipped backward, suddenly out of control.
I’m done for, I thought. Would I really fall to my death before I found the culprit?
Xia Qing, walking behind me, grabbed me in time and pulled me into her arms.
“Throwing yourself at me?” she asked with a teasing smile.
I stared at her. Between her past behavior and her sexual orientation, she had to be the one who kissed me that night. Case closed!
I sprang out of her embrace and put as much distance between us as I could.
My reaction must have been too dramatic, because Jiang Zhi, who was walking ahead, abruptly turned around.
“Watch where you’re going.”
She frowned at Xia Qing and me, her expression icy.
I nodded in a fluster.