Chapter 5
The scent of ylang-ylang mingled with Lu Hemian’s faintly bitter sandalwood, weaving a net with no way through.
I trembled, my heart pounding.
My knuckles whitened around the dagger. Its point rested over his heart, and my voice shook.
“Lu Hemian, you… calm down. Let go of me!”
He bent closer, inch by inch.
Without my willing it, the hand gripping the dagger retreated inch by inch.
Until I lay pressed into the daybed, his burning body against mine, our breaths mingling.
His hot breath scorched my earlobe. I was acutely aware of him.
“Can’t bring yourself to do it?”
I glared at him, eyes wide.
“Who says I can’t?”
The dagger could cut through gold and jade. Its point rested over his heart.
All I had to do was push.
Then he could no longer pin me beneath him, threatening me with his overwhelming presence.
He wouldn’t tear away my clothes or take my virginity.
Perhaps I should do it.
But for some reason, my arm had gone as soft as cotton.
The blade wavered uselessly over his heart. I simply couldn’t drive it in.
Lu Hemian drew a ragged breath. His deep voice brushed my ear, hot enough to burn.
“Zhiqing, when you strike an enemy, make the first blow fatal.”
Then, without warning, he leaned down and kissed me hard.
“Mmph!”
The kiss crashed over me like a storm. I couldn’t break free.
All I could do was clutch his robes and endure its ferocity.
Lips and tongues tangled; our breath mingled.
He kissed me far too hard.
He bit my lip and gripped my waist, rough calluses dragging over my delicate skin.
His hand pressed somewhere—I couldn’t tell where—and I jerked.
“No, don’t…”
My waist arched upward, only giving him a firmer hold.
Outside, snow whispered down onto the pavilion.
Inside, the air grew feverishly hot.
Lost in the dizzying tangle, I flung out an arm. The dagger skimmed his cheek.
It severed a lock of hair and left a line of blood on his face.
Blood ran down his cheek onto mine.
Startled, I accidentally bit his tongue.
He tilted his head, wiped the blood away, and smiled as though it meant nothing.
“You won’t hurt me like that.”
His hair had come loose from its crown. His lips were red from kissing. With that exquisite, almost otherworldly face,
he looked like a spirit that lured people into a lake to drown.
His hot palm closed over my trembling hand.
He guided the blade through the front of his robe, baring his strong, lean chest.
“Will you kill me, or let me keep kissing you?”
My heart raced inside my chest.
Like a rabbit trapped there, it battered fiercely against my ribs.
I closed my eyes.
When I opened them again, I took a deep breath and threw the dagger away.
It rang brightly against the floor.
A flicker of surprise crossed Lu Hemian’s eyes.
I cupped his face and spoke fiercely.
“It’s an addiction. Do you really think I understand nothing?”
I tied the heavenly-silkworm silk over his eyes.
Straddling him, I turned my face aside, scarlet from cheeks to throat.
I tried to look formidable, but the thought of what came next left my fingers weak.
Slowly, with unsteady hands, I began to loosen his sash.
“Open your eyes and I’ll castrate you.”
“…I’ll help you through it.”