Chapter 1

How did a gorgeous woman like me end up transmigrating into a character like this?

I looked down at the woman sobbing pitifully before me, then at my own unmistakably male body, and felt a headache coming on.

Just as I was wondering whether jumping out of their thirty-eighth-floor window would send me back to my original world, a voice abruptly burst into my mind—

“Beep beep! Hello, valued guest! I am System 00567, delighted to be of service!”

“Our system detected your intense desire to transmigrate. Unfortunately, there has been a huge surge in transmigrators in recent years, and we really don’t have any openings left for you, dear. But don’t worry! In this world, you are still the protagonist among protagonists, the man among men!”

I cursed at it in my head. “I’m a woman.”

The system fell silent for a few seconds. “Then perhaps you might be interested in—”

“No.”

“And I have no desire to become some lunatic who thinks about sex all day. You’d better tell me how to get back right now, or else—”

This time, I was the one who fell silent.

I had absolutely nothing I could threaten it with.

“Or else I’ll kill myself.” I bristled with all the fury of an angry fluffball.

The system shrieked, “Oh no, my guest! You would punish me with your death? How could you even think that? You would only lose your life, while I—I would receive a bad review that could never be erased!”

I drew a deep breath. The woman before me timidly raised her head, her gaze insecure and painfully sensitive. “Please let me go…”

The moonlight outside was lovely.

From the entryway, I could see the man inside sleeping like the dead.

The system was still making a nuisance of itself in my head.

My temper flared. I gently moved the woman aside. “Sorry, I won’t bother changing my shoes.” Then I strode straight into the bedroom and unleashed a storm of slaps on the man in bed.

“You’re still sleeping? Someone as big as me walks right into your home and you’re still asleep? Planning not to live till morning or what?”

The woman screamed from the entryway.

The system screamed inside my head.

My temple throbbed violently. Facing the barely conscious man, I straightened my arm, wound it back ninety degrees, and brought it down with all my strength.

The world fell silent.

The man woke. Moonlight fell across his face, illuminating his features.

He was actually handsome.

The handsome man, his right cheek swollen and red, looked completely bewildered. “Boss, what are you doing here?”

He hissed. “My face… it really hurts. Did someone hit me?”

Perfectly composed, I adjusted my suit and tie and smiled. “No. You had a nightmare.”

“A nightmare? What kind of nightmare could…” Zhou Bai touched his obviously aching cheek in disbelief and muttered to himself.

“But Mr. Lin, why are you in my home?”

The system was still playing dead.

I gave a scornful laugh, flicked a strand of hair off my forehead with one finger, and said calmly, “Oh, there’s a problem with your presentation. I came to bring you back to the office to fix it.”

In the end, Zhou Bai pulled on his clothes like a confused puppy and let me drag him out the door.

As I was about to close it, I suddenly looked back at the scantily dressed woman and clicked my tongue in disapproval.

“It’s already autumn. Get yourself some fleece pajamas. They’ll keep you warm.”

“And don’t open the door to outsiders this late at night. What if it’s some monster wearing a human face?”

The woman stared at me in shock, her cherry-red lips trembling.

Yes. I was that monster.

But so what?

I was going to drive the whole world insane.