Chapter 4

I really, truly hated lessons.

When I was very small, Father hired a tutor to teach my brothers and sisters at home.

I was allowed to join them then, but I couldn’t understand what the tutor was saying. When I asked, he wouldn’t answer. He would hit my hands with a ruler instead.

Gradually, I stopped going. I don’t know what he told Father, but Father was furious when he found out. From then on, I was never allowed out of my courtyard.

Whenever I thought of a tutor, I thought of the ruler.

After breakfast, I sat at the table, fidgeting and refusing to get up.

Husband looked at me. “What’s wrong?”

I squeezed my palm and lowered my head. “Could I not go?” I protested softly.

“You have to learn if you want to grow. Don’t you want to grow up, Yinyin?” Husband stroked my head.

So that was why I hadn’t grown up. I hadn’t been studying.

Now I understood. But I still couldn’t be happy. “Teachers hit your hands.”

The ruler hurt.

I was more afraid of pain than anything.

Only after Husband promised again and again that the teacher would never strike me did I agree to go.

My teacher was a pretty woman.

I sat at the desk with my head propped in both hands, looking at her. Grinning, I told her, “Teacher, you’re so pretty.”

She blushed and promptly dropped a book onto my desk.

“We’ll begin by teaching you some characters, madam.”

I pouted.

Pretty teachers and ugly teachers were all the same.

She asked me to find my name in the book.

The tutor Father hired had taught us to write our names in our very first lesson too.

After all those blows from the ruler, it was the only thing I’d learned.

Looking at the characters beneath my finger, she seemed rather surprised. “Very clever, madam,” she said a little awkwardly.

My eyes lit up. Suddenly I was full of enthusiasm.

“Teacher, which two characters mean ‘husband’?” I stared at the book before me.

She hadn’t expected me to be so eager. I kept her teaching me all day, and at last I learned those two characters.

Just as Husband promised, no matter how many mistakes I made, she never hit my hands.

When the lesson was over, she even stroked my head and smiled. “You’re very clever, madam.”

I was so happy I hardly knew which way was up.

On the way back, Nanny walked behind me, teasing me with a smile. “Forgotten your nanny already, miss? Why didn’t you ask how to write my name?”

My silly grin froze. Pressing my lips together, I turned and promised earnestly, “Tomorrow, Nanny! I’ll learn your name tomorrow!”

She smiled and straightened my crooked collar. “I was only teasing. I’m happy as long as you and your husband get on well.”

A few steps later, we saw Husband leaning against a tree. My eyes brightened. I gathered up my skirt and ran to him. “Husband!”

He caught me securely, his brow creasing. “No running next time.”

But I couldn’t help it.

Perhaps it was because, apart from Nanny, no one in all those years had ever been so good to me. I wanted so badly to hold on to him.

He’d come to take me back for supper. I swung our joined hands in the air and began showing off all the praise I’d received from Teacher that day.

“Oh? And what did you learn today?”

Remembering the crooked characters I’d written for “husband,” I suddenly felt my cheeks grow hot.

I’d wait until I could write them properly before telling him.

I stuck out my tongue. “Some characters.”

He didn’t ask any more questions. Before long, we were back at the courtyard we’d left that morning.

I stood at the gate, staring at everything inside.

Beautiful flowers had appeared out of nowhere. There was even the swing seat I’d always dreamed of.

None of it had been there that morning.

I walked in, dazed. This courtyard was much prettier than even my eldest sister’s.

Husband held my hand, gently brushing his thumb across its back. The tickling brought me to my senses, and I looked up at him.

“Yinyin, I’ve always lived rough. I don’t know what sort of courtyard young ladies in the city have, so I asked them to copy the courtyards of the wealthy families. Still, the Lius are the richest family in Lucheng. I don’t know if this is as nice as your old one.”

I shook my head quickly.

He probably didn’t know that my old courtyard had never had any flowers or plants like these, much less a swing that could go so high.

“Do you like it, then?”

I nodded hard. “I do. I love it.”

Surely no one in the whole world could ever be better to me than Husband.

For his sake, I would study hard and grow up quickly.