chapter 1
Mother’s sharp gaze swept toward me the instant she heard that.
“How would you know the Young Prince’s tastes?”
“How dare an unmarried girl pry into such things? On your knees!”
She had always loved lecturing me.
Unlike the prickly creature I had been in my last life, I dropped to my knees without protest, my back perfectly straight.
Mother frowned.
Shen Miaoyi looped an arm through hers and said approvingly, “Aunt, powder blue really does suit me. It is rare for my little sister to be so thoughtful, so I shall listen to her this once.”
Mother looked away from me, her voice softening with gratification.
“You are the sensible one.”
“Her Majesty the Empress sent us a bolt of powder-blue Sichuan brocade. It will be perfect for a new dress for you.”
That brocade had been a coming-of-age gift to me from my cousin, the Empress.
Shen Miaoyi gave a delicate little gasp.
“Sister Ningshu may not want to give it to me. How could I possibly accept…?”
Mother shot me a displeased look, shaking her head and sighing.
“She is rotten wood that cannot be carved. Dressing her in such fine cloth would only waste it.”
I lowered my eyes.
In my last life, I had fought Shen Miaoyi for dresses and fine horses, and eventually for a husband.
It was all because I envied her.
I envied that her parents had taken her with them when they went to war.
And I envied that my parents had cared for her for ten years and treated her as their own greatest hope.
I had grown up on an estate, suffering under a cruel nanny.
If I did not have something, I had learned to fight for it myself.
Yet after a lifetime of fighting, I still could not win the smallest scrap of their love.
“Miaoyi, before your parents died for the realm, they entrusted you to my care. Never mind a bolt of silk. Even when it comes to marriage, if there is a match you favor, Ningshu must let you choose first.”
Mother patted her hand affectionately and placed the profile of the young man I had liked into her arms.
Tears welled in Shen Miaoyi’s eyes, and she nestled into Mother’s embrace with practiced ease.
“Aunt may not be my mother by blood, but she is a true mother to Miaoyi…”
“And in my heart, you are dearer than a daughter of my own.”
They held each other.
I pressed my lips together and smiled as if I knew nothing.
“Mother and Sister Miaoyi really do look like mother and daughter to me.”
I left the courtyard.
My maid Xiao Yuan hurried after me, worried.
“Why didn’t Second Miss fight for it?”
Indignant on my behalf, she said, “Fine dresses, fine face creams–Miss Miaoyi gets everything! It was bad enough that Second Miss suffered before. Your parents have finally returned, so why are you still the one being wronged…?”
I wiped her cheeks and huffed.
“No crying. Only a strong maid can be her lady’s good maid!”
Xiao Yuan rubbed her eyes.
“Oh. Then I won’t cry.”
“But a marriage to the Young Prince is so rare. If you married him, your life would surely be better than it is now…”
I fell silent for a moment.
Then I looked up at the sky and smiled wistfully.
“There, there. When you pin all your hopes on someone else, there are never any guarantees.”