Chapter 2

Chapter 2

In the past, I cared about the Grand Preceptor’s Mansion’s reputation.

No matter how outrageously Liu Wanqing acted, I always found a way to cover for her.

It was just that the speed at which I cleaned up her messes could never keep up with the speed at which she made them.

Until this time, she still thought she could act spoiled in our parents’ arms and pressure me a little, and I would swallow every bitter consequence as I had before, then shoulder all the blame in public to preserve everyone else’s good name.

But she never considered that this time, I had finally seen the light.

The Grand Preceptor’s Mansion had rotted to this state. I could not save it on my own.

If it was going to rot, then everyone could rot together. Before it rotted through, I would pull myself out first.

Soon, the matter of Liu Wanqing stealing her own sister’s fiancé spread all over Shangjing. Especially since what I said that day had been so ambiguous: I only said that everything that should have happened between her and Xiao Liu had happened, but never explained exactly what aspect I meant.

Now whenever Liu Wanqing went out to attend a banquet, the looks others gave her were full of insinuation. The noble young ladies of Shangjing were unwilling to sit with her, afraid their own maidenly reputations would be tarnished.

After suffering humiliation outside, Liu Wanqing came home and cried to Mother.

Mother was angry, so naturally she wanted to call me to account.

The servants from her courtyard came to summon me. At first, I refused to go.

Only when she used the hierarchy between elder and younger, superior and inferior, to pressure me did I put on a pitiful, sickly face and dawdle my way over.

The moment I entered, I called out to Mother. Before I could finish a single sentence, my head drooped and I fainted.

This startled Mother instead, and she asked Rong’er, who was supporting me, what had happened.

All I felt was Rong’er ruthlessly pinching her own thigh, and then she began her tearful, heartfelt account:

“Ever since what happened last time, Miss has suffered a terrible shock and damaged her health. These past few days, she has been muddleheaded, speaking nonsense more often than she has been lucid. In her dreams, she keeps calling for Madam. When she wakes and cannot see Madam, she lies back down in despair. Today, upon hearing Madam’s summons, Miss could barely even walk, yet she refused to call for a sedan chair and came on foot to pay her respects.”

Her words were especially moving. By the time Rong’er finished explaining that I had fainted the moment I came in because the walk had exhausted me too badly, Mother had nothing left to say.

After a few words of concern, she had Rong’er send me back.

Somehow, word of this incident leaked out. Afterward, whenever Liu Wanqing attended banquets, she was inevitably subjected to a round of cutting remarks.

They said that I had already been harmed by her to the point of being bedridden, yet I had still kept the matter hidden without letting a whisper escape, while Liu Wanqing spent all day showing her face in public and even blamed me when she felt wronged.

When these words reached Father’s ears, Liu Wanqing was, for once, confined at home.

She was full of resentment and came to settle accounts with me. By the time she reached me, her eyes were already red, and the moment she stepped forward, she made as if to kneel.

I let her kneel first. Only after a long while did I tremble and sit up with Rong’er’s support. First, as if my soul had left me, I mistook the medicine stove by my bed for something else and hurled it at her.

Liu Wanqing could not dodge in time and was splattered with ash.

Before she could even cry out, she saw me pointing at the jade pendant at her waist, both hands shaking. “That… that is… you and Lord Xiao…”

Before I finished speaking, my eyes rolled back and I fainted dead away.

When Rong’er came to support me, she took the opportunity to puncture the cowhide pouch of chicken blood hidden beneath my pillow.

At once, she screamed in alarm and ran outside.

On the way, she happened to run into the noble young ladies who had come to the mansion the day before.

Covered in blood and looking utterly devastated, Rong’er told them that the younger young miss had come to see me wearing Young Master Xiao’s token, and that the shock had made me cough up blood.

Those noble ladies had their fill of gossip and left with satisfied expressions.

That night, when Father returned home, he wanted to sell Rong’er off.

I dragged my sickly body before him. After bowing once, I coughed up blood three times.

I only said that if Father wished to sell Rong’er, he might as well deal with me too.

In the midst of his fury, Father’s gaze toward me instead gained a trace of scrutiny.

“Wenyu,” he said. “In the past, you were the one who cared most about the mansion’s reputation.”

Yes. When I was young and followed Father to Shangjing, he had just gained a firm footing at court. Mother warned me every day that I must be careful in word and deed. For a man in Father’s position, reputation mattered most. Reputation could take a person’s life.

Though I only half understood at the time, I did not want anything to happen to Father.

So when I first entered the capital, I became even more cautious and meticulous in everything I did. Even compared to the noble girls who had grown up in Shangjing, no one could find fault with me.

Just like that, the reputation of the Grand Preceptor’s Mansion became a blade hanging over my head. It made me careful day after day, and it bound my hands and feet, making me dull and lifeless day after day.

At this moment, I looked up at Father without concealing the exhaustion in my eyes. “Your daughter has lived her whole life carefully, afraid of dragging Father down. I have never dared to act recklessly in word or deed. Now that my lamp has burned dry and its oil is spent, I only wish to have a few old companions before my eyes.”

Father was silent for a while before finally saying, “What nonsense are you talking about? You are still very young.”

I smiled bleakly and offered no comment.

In the end, he swept his sleeves and left without punishing Rong’er.