Chapter 3
Bai Liye’s gaze moved between Shi Liaoliao and Lu Yanzhou.
What was with this atmosphere between two grown men?
Why did she suddenly feel left out? Had something happened that she didn’t know about???
“Why aren’t you eating? Does my food taste bad?”
Bai Liye sat down not far from Lu Yanzhou, her limpid eyes full of pitiful appeal.
Lu Yanzhou: “Yes.”
Bai Liye: “………” Blind bastard.
Catching sight of Shi Liaoliao standing nearby as though none of this concerned her, Bai Liye lost the softness in her voice. Her anger found an obvious new target. “I’ve been here this long, and I haven’t even been offered a drink?”
It took Shi Liaoliao a moment to realize she was being addressed. “What would you like to drink, Miss Bai?”
Lu Yanzhou raised his eyes and glanced at her.
However rebellious she was inside, she was still doing this job… What could she do, even when someone deliberately made things difficult?
“Something tasteful, suitable for someone of my standing…”
“A 1982 vintage?”
Bai Liye’s eyes lit up.
Chateau Lafite 1982?!
Shi Liaoliao looked at Lu Yanzhou, who was playing with the dog. Without so much as lifting his eyelids, he gave a slight nod.
With his approval, she turned and went to prepare it.
Left alone with Bai Liye, Lu Yanzhou plainly had much less patience.
The unexpected development was the only reason he’d stayed in the first place.
Thinking of the inner voice that had suddenly appeared in his head, he curled his fingers slightly and prepared to do some research.
Half an hour later…
A servant knocked on his door.
“What is it?”
Lu Yanzhou looked away from the computer screen, his tea-brown eyes once more as indifferent as they’d been at the start.
The servant wore a complicated expression. “Miss Bai… has been picked up.”
Lu Yanzhou looked back at his screen.
“Mm. Understood.”
“By an ambulance,” the servant added.
Lu Yanzhou paused.
Something occurred to him, and he looked at the servant in the doorway with a touch of surprise.
“What did Shi Liaoliao give her to drink?”
The servant looked close to tears. “He… he… he gave Miss Bai…”
“Laxatives from 1982.”
Lu Yanzhou: “………”
At the word “laxatives,” his brain practically shriveled.
“Ha…”
He pressed a hand to his forehead and laughed under his breath, shoulders trembling slightly.
The servant: “…………”
How am I supposed to suggest firing Shi Liaoliao if you react like that?
Remembering how Bai Liye had rushed out of the bathroom, so weak yet still determined to stuff money into his hand, the servant resolved to fulfill his mission. He would get that Shi Liaoliao, with the looks of a male fox spirit, thrown out!
“Mas… young master, there’s one more thing.”
“Hm?”
There was still a trace of laughter in his voice.
“I think you should have a look at your back garden.”
Meanwhile…
Having seen off Bai Liye, the supporting female character, Shi Liaoliao returned to her room and wondered whether she should pack.
Lu Yanzhou had suddenly started acting… strange.
Although he was the Lu family’s sole heir, he didn’t get along particularly well with the current head of the family, his father.
The previous butler had been sent by his father to keep an eye on him. Lu Yanzhou had finally come of age, but before he could choose someone to fill the vacant position, that old fart, the head of the Lu family, had rushed to foist Shi Liaoliao on him.
As a result, none of Lu Yanzhou’s servants liked her much, and neither did Lu Yanzhou himself.
But what was Shi Liaoliao supposed to do?
She’d opened her eyes to find herself an expert at dressing as a man. The body’s original owner had left only a note, warning her never to reveal her sex or her life would be in danger.
Bewildered and terrified, Shi Liaoliao had relied on the original owner’s memories to stay in character, while also having to keep up the act of being a man.
She’d had enough of a life where she couldn’t eat snail rice noodles, stinky tofu, or chive pockets, and had to wait on someone into the bargain!!
At the thought, Shi Liaoliao, perpetually expressionless in everyone else’s eyes, let out a wail and rolled furiously around on her bed.
“Why hasn’t that brat Lu Yanzhou told me I’m fired yet?!”
No sooner had she spoken…
Something dropped out of thin air onto Shi Liaoliao’s forehead. A mechanical voice sounded in her head at the same time, leaving her utterly stunned.
[Congratulations, host, on unlocking the achievement ‘Drive Away the Fake Innocent.’ The system has been activated. Keep up the good work. Complete the mission ‘Wait for the Heroine’ to return to your original world.]
Shi Liaoliao sat up, grasping the thing clinging to her face.
A small, fluffy hamster with a round little body sat in her palm, looking at her with eyes the size of black beans.
[Hi, baby~]
Shi Liaoliao poked its bottom, looking surprised. “You’re a system?”
I’ve been here for two years, and you’re only showing up now?!
Seeming to read the accusation on her face, the hamster scratched its ear sheepishly.
[Here’s the thing. After screening lots of people who’d transmigrated into novels, we found that you met our requirements best. That’s why we’re only appearing before you now, dear host.]
Shi Liaoliao caught the key word.
“Novel?”
Recognizing its cue, the hamster plopped down in her palm and began to explain. [My full name is ‘The Romance World’s Spare Brick: Put Me Wherever I’m Needed’ System. You’re currently in the world of one novel among countless others.]
[Due to an accident, the previous butler didn’t survive until the plot point where the male lead comes of age and meets the heroine. That meant the crucial lines were never triggered, so we need you to fill his place.]
Shi Liaoliao raised a brow.
“What lines?”
[It’s been so long since I’ve seen the young master smile this happily.]
[This is the first time the young master has brought a woman home.]
[I’ve never seen the young master care this much about a woman.]
Shi Liaoliao: “………”
Any second now, she expected a doctor friend to turn up complaining, “Why did you drag me over here in the middle of the night?”
“Wait… You mean I have to stay here now? I can’t leave??”
It suddenly hit her.
The hamster nodded. [Exactly, exactly.]
Shi Liaoliao thought back over everything she’d done.
Her heart sank.
Shit.
Watching Shi Liaoliao visibly lose her grip on the here and now, the hamster wriggled its bottom uneasily.
It couldn’t resist reminding her.
[Host, aren’t you supposed to give me a name? That’s how this usually goes, isn’t it?]
Looking ready to meet her end, Shi Liaoliao stared emptily ahead. “Wanwan.”
The hamster clapped its paws excitedly.
So cute!
Better than ninety-nine percent of systems worldwide!
Delighted with its adorable new name, the hamster asked, [Which wan?]
Shi Liaoliao: “The wan in gaowan. Testicle.”
Wanwan: “………”
Somebody call the police.
It was about to protest when someone suddenly knocked on Shi Liaoliao’s door.
She sprang upright in one movement.
At the same time, Bai Liye lay in the ambulance, her face ashen.
It’s over. I missed out on the staggering fortune and got a staggering torrent of shit instead. I can’t even imagine what nicknames the Lu household will give me behind my back.
…
Shi Liaoliao got up and opened the door. The moment she met the eyes of the person outside, she seized the initiative. “Are you here about the Shitting Lady?”