Chapter 2

Chapter 2

By the time it was almost ten, everyone had arrived.

The host asked us to sit together and first introduce what we looked for in a partner, then exchange gifts.

I’d prepared something big. Guaranteed to stun the room.

Ren Tiantian went first.

She was our heroine, the currently red-hot rising starlet who’d shot to fame overnight and ascended to A-list status.

“In real life, I tend to like guys who are a little older. Mature, good at taking care of people, and with their own career and goals.

“Huh? Are you asking if I’d date someone in the industry? Of course. If he were in the industry, that would be even better. We could discuss acting together, and I could learn from him how to conduct myself in life.”

As she spoke, she secretly glanced at Xi Yan.

Perfect. My chance had come!

I egged her on. “You might as well just say his name!”

Xi Yan: “You might as well just say his name!”

We spoke in perfect unison.

Ren Tiantian froze.

I froze too.

Both of us stared at Xi Yan, dumbfounded.

I was talking about Xi Yan.

Who on earth was Xi Yan talking about?

The person in question was munching on sunflower seeds with the gleeful expression of someone watching drama unfold. He leaned over and whispered to me, “Isn’t she talking about Director Zou?”

How could it be Director Zou?!

Director Zou was in his fifties!

That was way too mature!

Also, why were you leaning so close just to whisper to me?!

“Why that face? Were you not talking about Director Zou? Then who were you talking about?” Xi Yan smiled as he cracked another seed, his alluring eyes narrowing slightly.

Every hair on my body stood on end. I sat up straight and shut my mouth.

“What just happened? Did Yan Ge just personally come down and dismantle a CP?”

“Wait, could what they’re saying be true? Tian Tian and the director?”

“I really don’t want to admit it, but they are on the same set every day.”

“If it were only Bai Bitch saying it, that’d be one thing, but Yan Ge said it at the exact same time…”

“No!!!” Ren Tiantian slammed on the brakes, cutting off this sunset-romance ship before it could go speeding down the highway. “Me and Director Zou? Bai Sheng, what are you thinking? He’s old enough to be my dad!”

“6666, as expected, it’s Bai Bitch smearing someone else’s innocence.”

“Wow, she really matches her role perfectly. That scheming. Basically playing herself.”

“Her ambition to climb the ranks can’t be hidden at all.”

“She thinks if she sets someone else up in a CP, Yan Ge will be hers? Dream on.”

Heaven have mercy, I really wasn’t talking about Director Zou…

I silently sank into depression on the sofa, shut my mouth, and the microphone was passed to Xi Yan.

The host asked, “The Best Actor’s ideal type is…”

“Me?” The man beside me cleared his throat. “I like Teacher Bai~”

The entire room went quiet.

My head snapped up, and I stared at him in disbelief.

The host was the first to react, trembling as she followed up with, “Ah… is that something you can say?”

Exactly! Was that something he could say?!

I made a decisive grab for the microphone and declared with righteous confidence,

“What Teacher Xi means is that he likes optimistic, hardworking juniors like me. When he sees us, he feels this industry is full of sunrise-like hope and vitality.”

Xi Yan cooperatively gave a hum of agreement.

I let out a breath. At least I’d managed to smooth that over.

Then I heard him drawl from beside me, “That’s part of it. Mainly, you’re cute.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

“What the hell is this?”

“I didn’t pay money to watch this.”

“What kind of backing does Bai Bitch have? How much did she spend to get Yan Ge to cooperate with her in hyping a CP?”

“I get it now. This must be scripted. First they make Yan Ge and Bai Sheng form a CP, so Tian Tian can become the white moonlight, the one that got away, and torture us CP fans. Then later on, Yan Ge will suddenly come to his senses and choose Tian Tian again. The ratings will shoot up the whole way. It’s all a routine.”

Even I was starting to suspect that was the routine!

But I didn’t want to be their stepping stone or their lab rat again.

When the microphone finally reached me, I said coldly, “I like younger guys.”

As I spoke, I threw a flirtatious wink at the junior across from me.

He cooperated by looking shy and bashful.

At long last, the bullet comments gave me a sliver of a way out.

“You’d better mean it.”

“If you two get together, I’ll send wedding money. I mean it. Stay away from our Ke Yan Ke Tian!”

“Stop clout-chasing, Bai Sheng. Forced clout-chasing never ends well.”

Just when I thought I’d survived, a resentful voice came from beside me. “Does he have to be younger?”

I stiffly turned my head. Xi Yan was hugging his knees, crouched on the sofa beside me.

A giant bird, acting all helpless and dependent.

“I think I’m pretty young too.” Xi Yan blew at the fringe over his forehead. “I’m not even thirty yet.”

I avoided his gaze and cut through the mess with one swift stroke. “I like older-woman-younger-man romances.”

Now you can’t possibly try to latch onto that, right?! Huh?!

I had seriously underestimated the Best Actor’s skills.

After a split second of dead silence, he called softly, “Jiejie-”

“Holy crap, I can’t take this. Why is he acting like such a simp?! Is this really Yan Ge?!”

“Damn it, why is there even a tiny bit of sweetness…”

“I’m wavering a little. This isn’t my fault. My brother’s acting is just too good.”

“I’ll camp out in Sheng Sheng Bu Xi for a few days. Once the breakup plot kicks in, I’ll go back to Ke Yan Ke Tian.”

…

I was a complete mess in the wind. “Teacher Xi, please don’t do this. I-I’m scared.”

“You don’t like being called jiejie?” Xi Yan was still smiling. “Then you can call me gege.”

Me: …

“Not going to?” Xi Yan narrowed his eyes. “Then I’ll keep going.”

“Bro!” I shouted with enough force to shake the mountains and rivers, the kind of shout that made it seem like I was about to drop to my knees, light some incense, and swear brotherhood with him in the Peach Garden.

At the same time, with lightning-fast reflexes, I pulled the ultimate weapon I had carefully prepared this time out of my bag.

A pair of cotton dolls.

The male one was the Immortal Venerable played by Xi Yan.

The female one was the Demon Venerable played by Ren Tiantian.

That’s right. My redemption strategy this time was to become the head fan of their CP!

As long as I was the head CP fan, diligently making content, the CP fans wouldn’t curse me out anymore!

Bet you didn’t see that coming~

“Oh, they’re pretty cute. Did you make them yourself?”

Xi Yan looked very interested as he scooped up his own cotton doll and held it, examining it from every angle.

“Yep, yep.” I hurriedly stuffed Ren Tiantian’s doll into his arms too, making him hold one in each hand.

“Little Tian, Xiao Bai Sheng made some merch for you. Look, how skillful.” Xi Yan conveniently stuffed it into Ren Tiantian’s arms.

“No, no, they’re a pair. They have to be displayed together.” I gestured in a flustered but totally fake panic. “Or you two can swap. Yan Ge, you hold Tian Tian’s, and Tian Tian holds yours. See~ couple merch has to be done like this.”

Xi Yan listened seriously, then drawled lazily, “How can that do? Don’t I still need to marry a wife someday? A man’s best dowry is his innocence-I’ll keep mine. Little Tian, take yours away.”

“??????????”

“Am I seeing this right? Tian Tian is going down the romance route, Xi Yan is also going down a romance route but a different one, and Bai Sheng is becoming their big-name fanfic creator?”

“The mistress I thought I was watching is the head CP fan, and the official couple I thought I was watching is tearing the house down like crazy. What exactly am I shipping? What’s real? What’s fake? I can’t tell anymore!”

“This dating show, seriously. The plot twists are insane. It’s only been ten minutes-how many reversals can there be?”

Ren Tiantian couldn’t take it anymore.

Once that drama aired, she and Xi Yan would be a national CP, and everyone would ship them to death. I could tell she liked Xi Yan too.

She had come on this dating show to strike while the iron was hot and ride another wave of popularity.

But now, all of a sudden, she had lost her advantage.

Who becomes the losing heroine on the very first day of a dating show?

Generously holding the cotton doll I made, she took out the little cake she had carefully prepared. “Thank you, Yan Ge. In exchange, this is for you~”

“It’s beautifully made.” Xi Yan praised it, then handed it straight to me. “Don’t you love sweets the most? Here, eat it while it’s still warm.”

Ren Tiantian and I looked at each other.

I even suspected Xi Yan was trying to create a CP between the two of us.

He really was an enigma of a man.

“That’s not very appropriate, is it? Tian Tian gave it to you, after all,” I reminded him.

If I actually ate it, I could get cursed straight onto the trending searches.

Xi Yan suddenly realized. “Right. Using someone else’s gift to make an offering of my own isn’t sincere.”

He set the cake aside and explained to me, “Here’s the thing. The production team asked us to prepare a gift for the person we fell for at first sight, but I only received the notice last night. I drove here all night and really didn’t have time to prepare anything. After thinking it over, this was all I could give you. Don’t think I’m tacky.”

As he spoke, he took out his wallet, pulled out a supplementary card, and pushed it in front of me.

A huge string of question marks floated across the bullet comments.

“Is he… giving her money?”

“Bank employee here. Let me say one thing: that’s a supplementary card for a black card. Yes, the legendary black card.”

“Oh my god, this man seems serious.”

“Can this dating show even last the full fifteen days? In fifteen minutes, that man has already fired off eight hundred straight balls.”

A massive number of fans flooded into the Sheng Sheng Bu Xi supertopic.

Because of our special character settings in the drama.

The homepage showed: 15,834 perverts currently online.

I looked at the black card, trembling slightly.

What script had he gotten, exactly?

Why didn’t I get one?

Could I still clear my name?

How was I supposed to survive the next fifteen days…