chapter 4
chapter 4
Shen Huaidu ground his teeth. Desperate to prove his virility in front of the woman he loved—and to wipe the contempt off my face—he lost his head and yanked his shirt open.
“Open your damn eyes and look!”
Pei Nian gasped, covering her mouth as her face flushed.
Shen Huaidu looked at me in triumph, as if he had just won a war.
“See that, bumpkin? Ready to shut up now?”
I did not display the embarrassed defeat he had expected.
Expressionless, I stepped closer and inspected him like a slab of pork at the market.
“Body-fat percentage: average. Definition: insufficient.”
“On a scale from built to busted, you barely qualify as an NPC.”
“That’s enough. Button up. You’re spoiling the view.”
The triumph froze on Shen Huaidu’s face.
I returned to the sofa at my leisure and picked up my tea.
His outrage was not simply wounded vanity.
For centuries, women had been treated as objects for display. Men were accustomed to using their gaze as a ruler, measuring women and attaching price tags.
All I had done was take the ruler into my own hands.
Shen Huaidu left in a storm of curses.
I was not finished with him.
I added him on WeChat and sent a message.
【Young Master Shen, today’s stress test indicates that your emotional stability, resilience, and service orientation all fall below the standards required of a live-in Pei son-in-law—pardon me, a Pei family’s son-in-law.】
【Your performance was unsatisfactory, but there is room for remediation. I offer a customized course in Becoming a High-Quality Modern Man.】
His reply came at once.
【Get lost.】
I wrote back.
【I sincerely want to bring you and Pei Nian together.】
【You love her, but your love is cheap. You can’t win over your family, and you can’t even handle her tears.】
【Imagine how disappointed she would be if she learned that you weren’t willing to study how to become a good husband.】
【You’re already useless enough that you can’t defy your family for her. Must you disappoint her again and again?】
Five minutes passed.
【How much?】 Shen Huaidu asked.
Ah, hopeless romantics were the easiest clients to monetize.
I sent him a shamelessly inflated quote.
Over the following days, I began managing Shen Huaidu remotely.
“Young Master Shen, Nian is in a bad mood today. Don’t send her money; that’s vulgar.”
“Learn to cook her favorite West Lake vinegar fish.”
“Buy the fish at the market yourself, and send me a video for inspection.”
“Young Master Shen, Nian looked at that actor for three seconds too long today. You should feel threatened.”
“Go to the gym and train legs and glutes for two hours. A man who skips leg day is courting impotence.”
Shen Huaidu cursed me every step of the way. Yet to present himself to Pei Nian as a reformed, exemplary boyfriend, he did exactly as instructed.
Nor was I idle.
I forwarded every photo and video he sent me to Pei Nian.
“See? Men require training. If I didn’t play the villain, would he ever behave this well?”
Watching Shen Huaidu sweat over cooking and exercise for her sake moved Pei Nian beyond words.
Much of her hostility toward me vanished. She even brought me a limited-edition handbag.
“Thank you, Big Sister.”
“But don’t get the wrong idea. I’m still the most beloved little princess in this family. Don’t think you can push me out.”
I looked at the bag and thought: So this is the joy of a middleman taking her cut.