Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Niangniang’s aunt had an extraordinarily beautiful face.

“Niangniang does resemble her aunt a bit,” everyone in the compound said.

When her aunt married in, Du Yuejia’s mother had just passed away from illness less than three months earlier.

“Didn’t you see how flirtatious she was? Acting all meek and submissive in front of Old Du, showing her arms and belly button all day long. She even picked out matching couple’s wool sweaters for Old Du to wear. He’s over fifty, doesn’t he feel shame?”

“Still, the Du Family son is so well-behaved, so polite to his stepmother. He changed how he addressed her and called her ‘Mom’ just like he was told, and he even takes really good care of that stepsister who came along.” That was what everyone in the compound said.

Du Yuejia was polite to everyone, a true gentleman, but especially to Niangniang.

So polite that it didn’t feel like how family should act-more like the boundary line he drew between family and outsiders.

It was Du Yuejia who took Niangniang to change her surname.

Old Du said, “Your little sister will be living in this house for good. It’s only right she takes our surname. Don’t object.”

“Dad,” Du Yuejia said with a smile as he accepted the household registration documents, “having a little sister at home, I couldn’t be happier.”

Niangniang’s birthday happened to fall on New Year’s Eve. That day the house was bustling with preparations.

Du Yuejia was over at Duan San’s place, so Niangniang was helping out by wiping the wooden floor in his room. The housekeeper told Niangniang to go over it carefully with wood polish, no slacking allowed.

Kneeling on the floor, Niangniang scrubbed back and forth until it shone, hoping in her heart that they could have a good new year, and also hoping her aunt and Uncle Du would find her somewhat useful.

As she was wiping, she accidentally bumped into a cabinet in the corner, and a pink shoebox tumbled out, carefully wrapped, with a birthday card tucked in.

Niangniang wiped her hands thoroughly clean, picked up the card, and saw written on it: “Happy birthday, my…”

“Are you allowed to touch that?” Du Yuejia’s voice sounded from behind her.

Startled, Niangniang turned around. “I… I didn’t mean to…”

“Is it that the moment you see anything, you have to snatch it?” It was the first time Niangniang heard Du Yuejia’s cold, cutting attitude up close. “Actually, that’s not the right word. When it comes to snatching, you don’t have the skill. You only know how to steal in secret.”

Just like loving someone.

Disgust and repulsion can’t be held back; they always seep out when you’re alone together.

No matter how well he pretended otherwise.

But at that time, Du Niangniang didn’t understand. She thought it was because she had messed up some detail, making her good-natured brother unhappy.

“Oh, brother’s back?” Her aunt’s voice came from not far outside the room, like she was coming up the stairs.

Niangniang, stung by his few words, felt a sour ache in her heart. Flustered, she quickly put the shoebox away, saying, “Sorry, sorry, I-I…”

“If you want it, just take it,” he sneered, just before her aunt’s voice drew near. “Poor little filthy thing.”

“What are you two siblings muttering about at the door?” Her aunt’s face was full of joy, the festive cheer of the new year.

“Whatever’s mine is my sister’s,” Du Yuejia said, his usual politeness back in place. Seamlessly picking up from his cold words a moment ago, he smiled at Niangniang and said, “If you like it, I’ll give it to you.”

Affection has no reason; it grows deep and keeps fermenting.

Hate has roots and grounds; the more time you spend together, the deeper it takes root.

Those shoes had originally been meant for Ruan Yu.

This pair of shoes, they were Ruan Yu’s.

They were designer heels specifically for the wedding, sparkling all over with tiny crystals.

They were placed at the entrance of the hotel suite.

The red wine stain wouldn’t wash out. I planned to find a place to change.

Du Yuejia and I went up to the hotel suite. This hotel belonged to the Duan Family, and they had a suite kept specially for us.

To my surprise, as soon as we entered, I saw Ruan Yu, who wasn’t toasting at the wedding but was instead in the suite, eyes red from crying.

And Duan Guanqin, sitting on the long sofa with his back to us, smoking.

So, he had come after all.

Ruan Yu wasn’t startled to see us come in. She just wiped the tear tracks on her face, glanced at me a bit longer, and asked, “Why did you come up?”

She was so composed that it made me feel out of place.

Duan Guanqin saw Du Yuejia and me. His eyes swept over the wet patch of red wine stain on my chest, and his tone was indifferent: “Don’t play around here.”

“Are you in any position to talk?” Du Yuejia shot back at him.

He flung a wine glass backhanded, missing Du Yuejia’s face by a whisker and smashing against the door, shattering soundlessly onto the thick carpet at the entrance.

Du Yuejia laughed, not angry at him.

“Had some wine and got hit by the wind,” he said, walking into the bedroom. “Got a terrible headache. Just want to sleep.”

I went into the bathroom in the living room, grabbed the spare shirt, closed the door, and was about to change out of the soiled white shirt.

Outside the door in the living room, Ruan Yu was sobbing, voice full of tears, soft and giggling, the kind of whisper between lovers.

Duan Guanqin didn’t speak; only the faint sound of scraping chairs and tables could be heard.

Her crying gradually stopped. After a moment of silence, she was coquettishly coaxing a laugh.

“Someone as prickly and coquettish as Ruan Yu, how could she be so easily coaxed?”

Words from an insignificant person in the distant past surged into my ears.

I hadn’t realized I’d remembered them for so long.

Insignificant words.

Truly, insignificant words.

My aunt taught me: what is love worth? You can’t eat it.

What are pretty words worth? Once spoken, they’re forgotten.

It’s only the listener who takes them to heart.

It only makes you seem fragile.

Taking off my shirt, I faced the bathroom mirror under the warm yellow light and looked at myself.

A red bruise, the width of a finger, on my waist.

Du Yuejia never observes propriety with me, especially in places unseen by others.

Tenderness and coaxing words belong to others.

It seems I was never destined to have these.

So much so that I keep telling myself: it’s not that I don’t have them, I just don’t need them.

No need, no desire, only then do I not seem lonely.

Only then do I not seem pitiful.

In his youth, Du Yuejia’s midnight dreams were full of his mother’s tears on her deathbed.

Trembling, she held Du Yuejia’s hand and asked him, “Old Du, still refuses to come?”

Even to her death, his mother waited for a prodigal to return.

Old Du said it wasn’t that he wouldn’t come, he just couldn’t make it back in time.

He was vacationing in Sanya with that woman.

In the hospital, nurses whispered behind their backs, saying his mother was pitiful.

Saying Du Yuejia was pitiful.

Ridiculous! On what grounds did they pity him?

When had he ever needed anyone’s sympathy?

Those who covet others’ things must pay the price.

Du Yuejia was waiting for that woman and the child she brought with her to repay that price.

They were like parasites, clinging to a host to live.

Niangniang was truly stupid. She thought that just because Duan Guanqin treated her a little differently, she could set foot in the Duan Family.

She was also really cunning; with just a few words, she charmed the elders of the Du Family and Duan Family into liking her especially.

Just like her aunt.

Feigning obedience and weakness were the usual tricks of such vermin.

The moment you let your guard down, they burrow into you, gradually devouring everything you have.

The more she was submissive and cringing, the more Du Yuejia wanted to rip off her mask.

The more she lowered her head and acted docile, the more Du Yuejia wanted to find an opportunity to ruin her.

Duan Guanqin was that opportunity.

Du Yuejia had figured it out: this dirty little creature actually had feelings for Duan Guanqin.

How dare she?

“Why wouldn’t she dare?” the young Duan Guanqin said flamboyantly. “I’m just that likable.”

“Don’t you find that disgusting?” Du Yuejia sneered.

“Why do you hate her so much?” Duan Guanqin looked up at him. “Don’t take out your grudge on her just because you couldn’t handle her aunt.”

“Don’t act so noble,” Du Yuejia scoffed. “You’re stringing her along like a cat toy, watching her jump through hoops for you.”

“That’s the fun part,” Duan Guanqin raised an eyebrow. “If you really hate her, I have a way to help you disgust her.

“Peng Ziming from Class 2 likes her. She’s been waiting for me eagerly at the school gate these past few days. I can have Peng Ziming go pick her up instead.”

What kind of disgust was that? Child’s play, Du Yuejia thought.

He turned to look at the green vine climbing and stretching toward the sun by the window: “Disgusting her is nothing; ruining her entirely would be best.”

Ruin her.

He had to find the best way to ruin her.

Otherwise, who would fill the void in his heart?

Duan Guanqin liked all beautiful things.

Beauties were just one of them.

But Du Niangniang was not among them.

At first, she was an overly easy-to-read pet cat, liking him yet daring not overstep.

She thought little of herself, as if naturally good-natured.

Duan Guanqin once overheard her aunt telling her in private: “Being likable is a skill, but it seems you weren’t born with it.

“Since you lack that skill, you need to learn to endure,” her aunt said. “It’s a good thing the elders of the Duan Family like you. That’s all you can rely on, so treasure it.”

Interesting.

This stepmother of the Du Family, having climbed up herself, was also teaching her niece to do the same.

Even aiming for his position.

But Du Niangniang was too clumsy, having inherited neither her aunt’s beauty and seductiveness, nor her emotional intelligence and cunning.

She wore her crush plainly on her face.

She dared not demand Duan Guanqin’s affection; if he gave two parts of feeling, she could spin eight parts of longing.

Sometimes, Duan Guanqin thought, using her to deal with his family was a pretty good choice.

After all, she couldn’t afford to lose anything, nor did she dare to harbor delusions.

So she was overly obedient, easy to manipulate.

She ingratiated herself with Uncle Du, with everyone in the Duan Family; even when traveling she brought back gifts for the housekeeper, afraid of what gossip might say about her.

She couldn’t afford to lose anything, had no sense of security.

So she could only cling tightly to the Duan Family; she couldn’t leave this life behind.

Without a material foundation, she couldn’t be mentally independent.

Duan Guanqin was certain that no matter how hard she tried in this life, if she left him, she wouldn’t be able to live this kind of life.

Accommodating him, forgiving him, clinging to him, ingratiating herself with him-these were the survival skills she had to learn.

Just as Du Yuejia said, this kind of woman is overly greedy, enjoying material things while still wanting faithful love-ridiculous.

This was a gift from fate that she couldn’t get rid of.

However, a person’s patience has its limits.

You can’t demand that a woman who truly loves you calmly watch you linger in the arms of other women.

Duan Guanqin understood her, so he gave her the freedom to act out.

This was a sign of concern.

Have you seen someone draw a circle around an ant with chalk?

She was that ant; he casually drew a circle, and no matter how she jumped inside, she couldn’t get out.

This was the thrill of conquest.

Duan Guanqin told himself he didn’t love Du Niangniang, just enjoyed it. Enjoyed this thrill.

Disgusting.

I kept rubbing the red bruise on my waist with an alcohol wipe.

But that only made it redder and redder.

Like an indelible mark.

The phone in my bag vibrated; it was a call from Qi Sen.

“Jiejie, where are you?”

“Qi Sen,” I murmured his name.

“Hmm?” His voice was gentle, as if he had sensed my unease from the slightest nuance. “What’s wrong, Niangniang?”

“Are you some super rich second-generation heir who’s liked me for a long time?”

He laughed on the other end: “Still half asleep?”

I listened to his faint breathing on the other end.

“If I were broke, would you leave me?” I asked him.

He countered: “Could you bear to let yourself live a life without money?”

“I couldn’t bear to lose you,” I said, spouting love talk.

His tone was teasing, with no hint of seriousness: “Jiejie, you’re so smart. Say something I can believe.”

Someone knocked on the door.

I closed my phone and opened the door.

Ruan Yu had restored her exquisite makeup: “Come down with me.”

Duan Guanqin was no longer in the living room.

I walked behind Ruan Yu, quietly waiting for the elevator.

“Don’t mind it,” Ruan Yu pressed the elevator button. “Duan San and I won’t be fooling around for much longer.”

They all thought I loved Duan San, a pathetic parasite.

Respect and sincerity didn’t exist in the circle I lived in.

Because they thought I wasn’t on the same level as them.

But I didn’t mind.

Feigning weakness and playing the good girl were skills I had to learn.

“This marriage is just a matter of mutual benefit between the two families, an exchange of resources. It’s not up to me,” she no longer looked at me. “Adding emotions would only complicate things.”

“You’re the only fool,” Ruan Yu stepped into the elevator and turned to look at me behind her. “You believe whatever Duan San and Du Yuejia say and do.”

“Do you really think Duan San and Du Yuejia genuinely like me?” Ruan Yu looked at herself in the elevator mirror. “What white moonlight? So laughable. Are they even worthy?”

It was unclear whether she was saying this for me or for herself.

“It’s just using me to satisfy their fantasy of first love,” Ruan Yu rubbed her forearm. “Forever submitting to their pursuit.

“Choosing me was simply because our family backgrounds are similar, we grew up together, I’m pretty, and have a good figure.

“Playing along with them is pretty fun too,” Ruan Yu said with a smile. “Anyway, that’s the only joy in life.”

The elevator reached the fourth floor.

Ruan Yu walked out without hesitation, heading toward her wedding that was about to end.

Before leaving, she said to me: “As a friend, I sincerely advise you: don’t get in any deeper. Cut it off as soon as possible.”

She didn’t say what to cut off.

Cut off the relationship with Qi Sen, or cut off the relationship with Duan Guanqin.

She simply said: “You have no status constraints; you have a choice. I don’t.”

That status had once been the source of her sense of superiority.

Now, it had become the pressure forcing her to bow her head.

At a time like this, she had actually started to envy me instead.

What was that like?

Like a princess in the palace about to be sent away for a political marriage, grabbing a little beggar by the roadside and saying, “I really envy your freedom.”