Chapter 2

Chapter 2

She was a little snobbish, chasing power and wealth, but there was nothing wrong with that.

But ever since I had followed Grandfather and read a few books, my thoughts had changed. If a person had only one final destination in life, then naturally one ought to live as freely and happily as possible.

That way, even if death came one day, it would not feel like a loss.

Uncle pondered this for a moment, then nodded and agreed. The next day, he returned to Boling. Before he left, he personally made a trip to the Pei Family. Only after he came back did he feel at ease leaving Ah Tao and me behind.

Ah Tao and I sorted through my dowry. There were some bolts of cloth and materials, and though the chest was packed full of money, it could not buy even a few pecks of grain if taken out. With grain prices so high, money was naturally worthless.

I dug out a pair of gold bracelets. They looked thick, but when I weighed them in my hand, they were not heavy. Most likely they were hollow.

Even so, they were still the most valuable things I had. I had to keep them close and only take them out in an emergency.

I did not know what betrothal gifts the Pei Family had prepared that day. In any case, my dowry certainly could not compare. There were many sisters in the family, all close in age, and for Mother to prepare a dowry like this was already no easy task. If I truly married into the Pei Family like this, they might not say anything aloud, but deep down, they would naturally look down on me.

The Pei Clan was a line of dukes and marquises, with officials in every generation and a reputation that resounded far and wide.

I had heard that Pei Qian was also among the finest of his generation. What could the Pei Family possibly gain by marrying me?

Most likely, only a good name. But that good name had been bought with a life I thought had ended in the most disgraceful way possible.

Marriage and divorce were no rare things. After Pei Qian married me, he could still marry someone else.

All I wanted was a quiet life. At home, Mother and the concubines fought day after day, each with more tricks than the last, all for the sake of a man like my father. I truly could not understand it.

And so, Ah Tao and I began living like this. The house had been given by the main branch of the Cui Family when they heard I was to marry Pei Qian. Now that I was living here, no one came to drive me away.

Two strong men stood guard outside the gate. Their faces were unfamiliar, so they had probably been sent by the Pei Family. Before Uncle left, what he had gone to discuss was likely the matter of ensuring my safety.

The courtyard lacked nothing, except that there was only a little grain, not enough to last more than a few days, and not a single vegetable.

It happened to be spring. Hedong was not quite the same as Boling; the wind was stronger and more frequent here.

Ah Tao and I bought some vegetables and grain, as well as vegetable seeds. Sitting around and eating through what we had was no long-term plan. With that bit of money, it would be spent in no time.

I was familiar with planting vegetables. Mother did not keep idle people around.

I was not very good at needlework. My grandfather lived outside the city, where he planted half a mu of vegetables, and I had learned from him.

If one spoke of true elegance and freedom, I acknowledged only my grandfather. In his youth, he had traveled across mountains and rivers, and his knowledge and experience were naturally extraordinary. He had also read countless books, but he was unwilling to enter officialdom.

My grandfather said that once a person entered officialdom, he could no longer be considered a pure person.

He could read and write, drink wine and compose poetry, and he could also go down into the fields and farm. He said a person’s worth should not be judged by their birth.

I agreed with my grandfather’s words. It was only that the world did not.

With a birth like mine, what sort of man I could marry would first depend on whether our families were of equal standing. And if the man’s family were a little higher in status, there were countless women who married in as concubines.

Marriage alliances between noble families had nothing to do with affection. Men and women came together mostly to tighten the bonds between their clans.

From the moment I was born, these were things I could not escape. But I refused to accept that.

Even if, in the end, I could not break free, I still had to try.