chapter 4

chapter 4

“I don’t believe you.”

My lady struggled to her feet and tore at the silk with all her strength. “Why haven’t Father and Mother come? Why did they send you? You must be lying. I don’t believe you—I don’t!”

The poised and proper young woman I knew now looked like one of the shrews who quarreled in the servants’ yard.

Perhaps out of pity, or perhaps because he had no other choice, the Eldest Young Master summoned the Marquis.

My lady trembled, her fingers icy around mine. “Father won’t abandon me. He has always loved me most.”

She rambled about how the Marquis had doted on her since childhood, even giving her a larger monthly allowance than the Eldest Young Master.

I nodded along. The Eldest Young Master must have misunderstood.

The Marquis and Marchioness loved her so dearly. How could they bear to make her die?

Even Mother, when she sold me, had never meant for me to die.

The marquis’s household had no shortage of food. Surely they could not truly force my lady to her death.

Only later did I understand.

To these gilded nobles, who never worried about food or shelter, reputation and appearances came before all else.

The Marquis arrived quickly. Stern-faced, he seated himself in the place of honor.

“The Wei boy died in battle. The entire capital praises his valor. This is your honor and the honor of our house. What do you mean by wailing like this?”

My lady’s face went white. Her lips parted, but no sound came out.

Seeing her so stricken, the Marquis sighed and softened his voice.

“A married woman follows her husband. You have studied the Virtues of Women since childhood and are my finest daughter. Now you must set an example for your younger sisters.”

He waved his hand. A servant brought in another tray bearing fresh white silk.

My lady had already cut the first length to pieces.

“Enough foolishness. Your mother fell ill after hearing of your tantrum. You are a filial daughter. Do not make her worry.”

My lady did not speak again, not even after the Marquis left.

It was as if she had accepted her fate.

At length, she pushed weakly at me. Her voice was hoarse.

“Yunzhu, I don’t want to die. But the great clans will not allow me to live. Go. There is silver in my dressing case. Take it, buy back your bond, and live well.”

I sobbed helplessly. “Come with me. We’ll go south. I can make pastries—we can both survive.”

“The dog hole! There’s a dog hole under the banyan tree. No one knows about it. We can crawl out and run.”

I could not make her move, so I wiped my tears and began packing on my own.

The shock had crushed her will to live.

But a wretched life was still better than a good death.

I would not let her die.

When the bundle was ready, I realized her clothes were too conspicuous. A maid’s outfit would be safer.

My lady and I were nearly the same size, so I went to fetch clothes from my room.

The door would not budge.

Of all times to jam!

Tears sprang up again as I threw myself against it. My lady, who had been lost in thought, started awake and pushed at the door herself.

Then she laughed through her tears.

“My future husband dies, and I must follow him into death. Only then am I a chaste and virtuous woman, proof that my parents raised me well.”

She rose and slowly lifted the snow-white silk, utter despair filling her eyes.

I could not accept it. My lady was gentle, learned, and impeccably mannered. In talent, she surpassed many scholars outside these walls. Why should she be buried with a man she had never married?

The daughter of a Ministry official had died of a chill a few days earlier. Why had no one demanded that her scholar fiancé follow her into death? The world was merciless only to women.

I gritted my teeth and took a pair of scissors from the basket.

“My lady, do you dare gamble with Yunzhu?”