Chapter 3

There was no disputing that Cheng Qi was carrying my brother’s child.

Our families were neighbors and had been friends for years. We could only let her marry in.

The ceremony was set for the end of the seventh month. Well into the middle of that month, Mother would lecture my brother and me whenever she saw us.

My brother, of course, had been beaten by Father until he could not get out of bed, on the very evening he brought Cheng Qi to meet our parents.

With one leg lame, he could go nowhere. He had to face his wife all day long, ashamed and agitated.

I had always thought the affair had nothing to do with me. I was merely a spectator.

But Mother summoned a number of the family’s women and children, then reprimanded me before them all at dinner.

“I cannot shield her simply because she is my daughter. First she kept this from her parents, then she deceived her elder sister-in-law, bringing discord into this house. She deserves punishment.”

She was rebuking me, setting an example, and restoring my sister-in-law’s dignity all at once.

I could only accept my punishment again and again. When my sister-in-law looked ready to plead for me, I gave a tiny shake of my head.

Mother sent me to kneel in the ancestral hall. The last time I had come here to reflect on my misdeeds was after the previous year’s Shangsi Festival gathering, when I had pressed a peony on the Cheng family’s third son.

At Shangsi, young men and women exchanged peonies to show that their affections were mutual.

He had not given me one in return.

I had knelt and cried then, feeling terribly wronged.

All I had done was express my feelings. What was wrong with that?

But Mother had spoken earnestly. “Third Young Master Cheng is a cultured, graceful young gentleman. He is also determined to rise in the world. At a single gathering he accepted peonies from who knows how many daughters of powerful families, refusing not one.

“You are neither his only choice nor his first. While you kneel here today, think carefully. Stop chasing him, as though a daughter of the Tao family will take just anyone.”

I had refused to accept her words then. Only now, seeing Cheng Qi, did I begin to understand.

Our families were perfectly well matched. Yet for love, Cheng Qi had become pregnant before marriage and agreed to be a concubine, casting aside both reputation and status. It hardly seemed worth it.

I was turning these thoughts over beneath the moon when my sister-in-law came carrying a kneeling cushion.

She tucked it under my knees. “Really, Mother. A foolish girl wants to marry into the household, and you have to suffer on these stone tiles.”

I smiled and shook my head. “Father nearly broke my brother’s leg. A little kneeling is nothing. Don’t blame yourself, Sister-in-law. I earned this.”

She looked closely at me, then smiled. “I thought you rather muddleheaded, Sister Songyue. You understand more than I realized.”

She had heard a few rumors, she said. Add the little looks passing between my brother and me, and she had guessed he had a sweetheart hidden away.

But she had not thought much of it. After all, she had not come to Jiangnan for mutual affection either. She had come to form an alliance between noble families.

“Few daughters of the Jiangbei Lius choose a husband for themselves. I didn’t want to come so far from home. But during the marriage negotiations, I saw how much your father respected your mother’s wishes. I liked that about your family, so I agreed.”

The early autumn night was close. She fanned me with a round fan, a rare playful smile on her face. “Better a house where you can make decisions than a life as your husband’s plaything.”

Something occurred to me. Afraid she might misunderstand, I hurried to explain. “When Mother said I deceived you, that was a little harsh. Heaven knows I only wanted to avoid trouble…”

She nodded, kneading my stiff back and waist. “I understand. Mother is mistress of the household. She has to be strict. Otherwise someone would seize on it and say the family’s elders set a bad example, and how could she answer them?”

Relieved, I smiled. “As long as you don’t take it to heart.”

She smiled too. “Nor may you.”

She knelt beside me until my punishment was over, then cooked several delicious dishes for a late supper. Only afterward did we go hand in hand to the inner courtyard to rest.

As the day for taking his concubine approached, my brother could finally get out of bed. He sagged silently in a chair, looking thoroughly wilted.

It was his first time back at the dinner table. At the sight of him, Mother’s anger flared. After scolding him, she turned on me. “Songyue, you really are timid and foolish. If you didn’t know your sister-in-law well enough, you could at least have told me. Preventing this would have been better than the scandal we have now.”

I apologized to my sister-in-law again and again, catching sight of my brother’s mocking smile. He had little enough right to laugh at me.

An idea struck me. “Sister-in-law, there’s a library in the south courtyard. Your books are all on the ground floor, but have you ever been upstairs?”

My brother froze. Once he understood, he glared at me. “The south courtyard is cold and damp. Stop sending your sister-in-law there.”

He spoke through his teeth. “If she catches a chill, you’ll answer to me.”

I blinked innocently and went on. “Do go and look, Sister-in-law. Behind the painted landscape screen upstairs are two white-glazed plum vases with carved decoration. The strangest thing: they don’t grow flowers, but they do grow silver.”

That would teach him to laugh at me. I had exposed his secret savings.

My sister-in-law understood at once. She smiled at my brother, then put several of my favorite dishes into my bowl. “This estate has been in the family for generations. So many pavilions and terraces, so many winding corridors and stone paths. I’ve been here such a short time. I shall need you to show me around.”

My brother lost his temper and retaliated, saying I had secrets too. I wanted to marry the Cheng family’s third son.

“Mind you, my wife may not see the whole estate before Songyue marries and leaves it.”

Before I could answer, Mother cut in. “You two have teased each other since childhood. But Songyue is old enough to marry now. Watch what you say, Songquan. It would do her no good if such talk got out.”

“Yes, Mother. I won’t speak of her that way again.” My brother fell silent, set down his chopsticks resentfully, and announced that he had eaten enough.

I deliberately reached across for a dish in front of him. “If you’re not having any more, Brother, I’ll finish it.”

To spite him, I even asked for another half bowl of rice.

Our parents were used to this, but my sister-in-law found it novel. Sitting beside me, she could not keep from laughing. “What a pair you are. A family ought to be this lively.”

For most of my life, my brother’s unhappiness had been a source of happiness to me.

That night, after I had practiced my calligraphy and was preparing for bed, my sister-in-law brought me a handkerchief she had embroidered herself.

She had taken my brother’s teasing to heart and asked whether I truly cared for Third Young Master Cheng.

I hesitated, remembering all Mother’s warnings. In the end, I could not help nodding.