Police
The Younger Man I’m Not Supposed to Love
At thirty-five, I experienced a cliff-drop divorce.
In truth, it wasn’t entirely without warning.
I am a police officer and Liang Xu is a prosecutor; in the eyes of others, we were a match made in heaven.
Late one night, Liang Xu turned off the light, climbed into bed, and spoke slowly.
“I feel like my life right now is nothing more than a pool of stagnant water.”
After that, he changed careers to become a lawyer, specializing in litigation for the wealthy.
We changed houses, and we changed cars.
The day our son started elementary school, he asked me for a divorce.
“Even though we have sex once a week, it feels like a routine chore.
“Perhaps you should try someone else, too.”
And I really did.
But then Liang Xu lost control of his emotions, grabbing my shoulders and shaking me violently.
“You’re a cop and he’s a crook! Can you please wake up?!”
With a swift counter-move, I pinned his arm behind his back.
“I got used to drinking lukewarm water, so now I want to taste some strong liquor. He’s rich, handsome, and young-what could he possibly want from me other than myself?”
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My son was being pestered by another boy.
The teacher called and asked me to come to the school.
When I arrived, he shouted at me for the first time. “Mom, what’s wrong with me liking boys?”
I looked at him, feeling neither anger nor resentment.
I crouched down and asked him in a low voice, “Then how can you be sure that you like boys?”