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On the eve of my wedding, my future mother-in-law forced me to press my bloodied handprint onto the paper. She told me the Shen Family wasn’t marrying me for love, but because my fate could save her son.

What she didn’t know was that the way to break that Marriage Contract had been left to me by my grandmother herself.

In the first year after my divorce, I announced my retirement from the scene.

Everyone said I had gone mad after being abandoned by Lu Xiao.

Until one day, a Wish Blogger’s video shot to the top of the trending searches.

My video was split into seven episodes.

Those were the last fragments of my life, flashing by like a carousel.

The title of the first episode was:

[By the time you see this video, I will already be gone.]

My husband brought home his “true love” and insisted on taking her as a concubine.

Tears of emotion filled my eyes as I clasped his true love’s hand and refused to let go.

“How could I possibly let you settle for being a concubine?

You can have my place as his lawful wife!

“Why don’t we make it a one-stop affair today—divorce for me, wedding for you!”

There was no time to waste.

The imperial decree ordering the confiscation of the family estate was already on its way!

Encounter a Ghost Knock at night? Don’t be afraid – call your neighbor out to collect a ‘lunch box’ (a euphemism for death).

Meet a Fierce Ghost demanding ‘death money’ at a crossroads? Just toss the money into the Buddha’s Merit Box.

The Ghost King disguises himself as a deliveryman to kill at random – but the delivery’s destination turns out to be an Ancestor’s secluded retreat on Mount Longhu.

Li Yi, transported to a supernatural world, awakens the Anti-Cliché Celestial Master Livestream System. From then on, the world gains a Celestial Master with an unusually quirky mind and shockingly ruthless methods.

On the third day after being diagnosed with Stomach Cancer, I chose a grave for myself.

They say the feng shui is especially good.

It’s supposed to bless me so that in my next life, I won’t be the real daughter everyone despises.

No one will steal my parents, my brother, or everything else from me.

No longer… unloved.

I burned my photos and clothes, erased every trace of my existence.

Then I slit my wrists, lay down in the bathtub, and waited peacefully for death.

But then the Cemetery Center suddenly called me:

“Miss Lu, we’re terribly sorry.”

“Two Agents accidentally sold the same plot.”

“This grave was also sold to another gentleman.”

“Would you… mind moving your grave?”

The System orders her to win over the male lead, but there is one tiny problem: she is a lesbian.

When the mission finally changes to the aloof, brilliant second female lead, she throws herself into courtship with all the subtlety of a guided missile—and gets kicked into a bush for her trouble.

Between library dates, disastrous gorilla costumes, a hopelessly idiotic male lead, and an armed kidnapping, her target remains convinced that every romantic gesture is part of a scheme to pursue the wrong person.

She may not realize when she has succeeded, but across worlds, explosions, doctoral degrees, and one scandalous graduation photo, her wifey keeps choosing her anyway.

A couple lived next door to me, and they were like tinder and flint-always ready to ignite.

Every night, their loud, frantic wailing kept me from getting a wink of sleep.

I tried reasoning with them, I tried cursing them out, and I even called the police, but nothing worked.

So, I decided to start pursuing his wife.

On Valentine’s Day, I went out of my way to tuck a small note inside a bouquet of roses: “Your husband hasn’t found out about us yet, has he?” Then, her husband absolutely blew his top.

On the night I was crowned Empress, Lu Yuheng personally handed me a cup of Poisoned Wine. He said that since the Ye Family’s name had been cleared, I should spend one night as a glorious Empress before going to meet my kin with a clean slate. But what he didn’t know was that the most painful wound of my life was never death-it was him.

The night I was sent into the Royal Palace, snow was falling from the heavens.

One hundred and twenty silver lamps lined the steps, but their wicks were not made of cotton; they were segments of little finger bones coated in white wax.

Everyone said that as long as I sold my last box of matches to the Crown Prince, Baili City would survive this winter.

Only I knew that the flames capable of conjuring the scent of bread, the crackle of a hearth, and the warmth of a grandmother’s smile were not blessings from God.

They were the final dreams of children who had frozen to death in the streets.

Tonight, the Royal Palace was coming for mine.

My husband could not father children, but he was so kind and capable that he brought home another man for me.

“He is an outsider, and a handsome one at that; once he gets you pregnant, we will simply throw him out.”

We pretended to be brother and sister and carried out our plan.

To our surprise, the man proved practically saintly: he not only left me with a child, but also paid me a fortune before he departed.

“A rustic village woman is no match for me, so do not pester me again.”

My husband was so furious that he tried to fight him, and I tearfully held him back.

“Brother, let it go—do not hurt him.”

Then I turned and whispered to my husband, “A gigolo who works for free and pays us on top of it is hard to find these days, so just play along.”

Together, we saw our generous benefactor off, used his money to buy land and open a clinic, had a son, and lived very comfortably indeed.

Three years later, the Crown Prince returned to the place where it had all begun and found the three of us together.

He went mad on the spot.

“Some brother and sister you are—you made a complete fool of me!”