Contemporary

When my roommate Jiang Sibing learned that I kept three men on standby, she joked that she pitied my future husband for draining his savings on a bride who had already been passed around.

After a moment’s hesitation, I offered to transfer one of them to her.

Jiang Sibing’s eyes widened at once.

I spent three years simping for Jiang An.

I cooked for him, did his laundry, and even wrote his elective-course assignments.

Then one day, someone asked him, ‘Jiang An, Lin Wanyue has been chasing after you for so long. Haven’t you ever felt anything for her?’

In the dim light, I heard him chuckle.

‘Huh? She’s just my housekeeper. Why would I fall for her?’

The whole room burst out laughing.

What none of them knew was that Jiang An paid me sixty thousand yuan a month.

The truth was… I really was the highly paid campus housekeeper he had hired.

I started dating someone online.

He claimed he was the crown prince of Beijing’s elite.

I claimed I was the princess of Nancheng.

He said he was six foot two, had eight-pack abs, and measured seven inches where it counted.

I said I was a D cup with a body no woman could rival.

When we finally met, I stared at him in shock.

“Wait—the actual crown prince of Beijing’s elite dates online? You’re surprisingly down-to-earth.”

He looked even more stunned.

“Wait—not one thing you told me was true? You really can lie through your teeth.”

My father was a professor at a prestigious university, and my mother held a doctorate in literature.

But only my older sister inherited their brilliant genes.

As for me, all I could do was chant “Makka Pakka,” the bitter little gourd their family tree had produced.

When my parents divorced, my sister chose Dad.

“I don’t want a retarded little sister,” she said.

I turned to Mom. “Be happy, Mommy. Makka Pakka!”

Luckily, Mom took my advice: she happily quit her job and started a company.

Years later, Dad nearly drove my genius sister out of her mind.

And I, still Makka-Pakka-ing my way through life, became the daughter of a millionaire.