chapter 5

During the wedding ceremony, Father placed Mother’s memorial tablet right in the center, making the Third Princess so angry that her eyes turned red.

Father held his head, speaking weakly: “I dream of Yaoniang every night, and my heart is uneasy. Besides, you are only a secondary wife. Bowing to her is nothing-just do it for me.”

A trace of struggle flashed in the Third Princess’s eyes. “If she were from a respectable family, it would be one thing, but she was born a lowly woman! I am a princess! How could she be worthy of my respect!”

Father, with his jet-black hair and red lips, let his long, slender eyes droop, a faint flush spreading at the corners-an exceptionally beautiful face.

The princess was stunned by Father’s sorrowful gaze. The hall grew so quiet that I could even hear the princess swallow.

Father’s long fingers rested at his slim waist, the reddish silk sash winding around his jade-like fingers, making his already fair skin appear even more luminous and enchanting.

He spoke with self-mockery: “I once thought the princess truly liked me, admired me, and wanted to spend a lifetime with me. But it turns out, I was mistaken. The princess only saw me as a dispensable plaything, unconcerned whether I lived or died. The Itinerant Taoist you invited said Yaoniang’s soul is full of resentment, which is why she clings to me and refuses to reincarnate.”

He sighed softly, his fingers tightening as he pulled off the red sash at his waist. His strong waist was instantly hidden by the loosened wedding robe.

Father took off the wedding robe, pressed his lips together, and threw it to the ground. “If you are unwilling to bow to her, then let this marriage be. Sooner or later, I am bound to die. If that’s the case, let Yaoniang take me to Yama’s Court. Why should you suffer and become a widow?”

The princess hurriedly rushed over to pick up his wedding robe, pulling it onto him as she choked out, “Brother Pei, how can you say such things? You wound my heart. How could I not care whether you live or die! If that’s what it takes, I’ll bow. Please put it on, don’t be angry anymore.”

Only then did Father put on the wedding robe and complete the ceremony with her. Afterwards, he used both gentle and forceful means to make the princess serve tea before Mother’s memorial tablet, and only then allowed her to return to her room.

That night, Father put a sleeping draught in the princess’s postpartum medicine, and held me as we sat outside the Ancestral Hall where Mother’s memorial tablet was kept, staying there all night.

I asked Father why he wouldn’t go inside.

Father stroked my head. In the moonlight, his face was pale as a ghost, but his dark eyes were moist.

He forced a bitter smile: “Yaoyao, be good. Go light incense for Mother on Father’s behalf. Father is afraid.”

I asked him in confusion, “Father, what are you afraid of? Mother loved you and me so much. Even if she became a ghost, she would still protect us!”

I pulled Father’s hand, trying to drag him into the Ancestral Hall. “Father, don’t be afraid of Mother. Mother loves you. She would never hurt you!”

Father’s palm trembled as he collapsed to the ground. He leaned over the threshold of the Ancestral Hall, sobbing in suppressed agony. His slender shoulder blades stretched the red wedding robe into an arc. He looked like a dying crane, or a swan with a broken neck, wailing in pain as he fell to the ground.

“Father has no face to see your Mother again…”