Chapter 6

Looking back, I always regretted it. I should have told my brother to take me away.

He was the one who treated me best.

When we were kids, whenever my dad got drunk and lost control, my brother would always stand in front of me.

He’d hide me under the bed and say, “Don’t be afraid. Your brother’s here.”

So I stopped being afraid.

When I was seven, my mom took my brother and me, carrying stolen ID cards and a few hundred yuan, and secretly left that home.

In the chaos, my brother held my hand tightly and told me, “Hold your brother’s hand. Don’t get lost.”

He held my hand like that for years.

My mom raised two children by herself. The pressure was immense. She was busy with work and had no time to take care of us.

It was my brother who first learned to cook, to do laundry, and to take care of himself.

Then he learned to take care of me.

My first birthday cake was from my brother.

He said, “The wishes God can’t hear, your brother can.”

He bought me pretty hair clips, and candied hawthorns on the way home from school.

The first time my brother fought was because someone called me a fatherless bad kid.

From elementary school, to middle school, to high school.

Our schools were a bit far apart. He had to cross two long roads and five traffic lights to pick me up after school.

Later, I returned to the He Family.

Before I left, my brother looked at me seriously and said, “I’ll come get you-just tell me if you’re unhappy.”

I said, “Okay.”

If I had ever said I wanted to leave, he would definitely have taken me away.

Then none of what happened afterwards would have happened.

The day my brother died was overcast.

I waited for He Yu at the school gate, from the end of classes until night fell.

Then a group of thugs showed up and cornered me in the shadow of the abandoned building next to the school.

I tried to run, but I couldn’t get away.

I recognized the boy leading them. He was a student from my school. He had confessed to me, but I didn’t like him, so I turned him down.

He cursed, “No one I set my sights on has ever dared reject me.”

He grabbed at my clothes.

I called for help, but there was no one around. All I got were a few slaps-nothing else.

At the last moment, my brother appeared.

He shouted at me, “Run! Don’t look back!”

I didn’t have time to think. I ran as fast as I could, looking for someone to help.

And I ran right into He Yu, who was walking together with He Wei.

He Wei frowned and asked, “What happened to your face? Who hit you?”

I didn’t have time to explain to He Wei. I just begged him to come with me to save my brother.

But when we ran back, a shadow flickered before my eyes, and then I heard a bang.

I glanced down, then quickly looked up again.

A gasp came from behind me. I turned around, dazed, just in time to see He Wei quickly cover He Yu’s eyes.

A terrible suspicion in my heart seemed to come true. I looked down again, and I couldn’t lie to myself anymore.

The person in front of me, covered in blood, was my brother.