Chapter 38
Fu Ziyi came too.
They’re so annoying. Why do they always have to cause trouble for others?
Fu Ziyi walked in and, without a word, opened the window.
The sunlight was so harsh that I couldn’t open my eyes.
My vision went black; I felt someone gently place a hand over my eyes.
Fu Ziyi spoke softly, “Take a shower later. If you’re tired, just skip washing your hair. Come out and I’ll wash it for you. Tell me what you want to eat, and I’ll make it for you.”
Such a familiar feeling.
He used to comfort me like this.
I opened my eyes and looked outside through the gaps between his fingers.
Why does even the sunlight feel gentle?
I said, “I don’t want to see them. Just seeing them annoys me.”
Fu Ziyi moved his hand away and said, “Alright, I’ll ask them to leave.”
I knew I was making another unreasonable request of him.
He Wei and the others kept their distance for a while, but still came to see me.
He Wei asked, “Isn’t everything getting better? Why do you want to die?”
It’s not getting better.
It’s all fake.
I asked him, “What about my brother? If it weren’t for me, he would have had a better future.”
He Wei paused, then said, “That’s not your fault.”
So he knew.
Suddenly, I found it a little funny.
If it had been the eighteen-year-old He Wei, he probably wouldn’t have been able to say that.
But it’s too late.
“Why wasn’t it you who died?”
“Don’t shirk responsibility. He died because of you.”
“Who else are you going to ruin?”
…
These words kept echoing in my mind.
I couldn’t make them stop.
“Let it end here.”
“Let it end here.”
“Let it end here.”
I knew I was stuck in a vicious cycle.
But I couldn’t get out.
I’m in so much pain.
Why can’t they see it?
When I smashed the bowl on the floor, He Jing was still discussing my treatment plan with Mrs. He.
“Get lost.” My outburst came without warning, and they were all startled.
“What’s wrong with you?” Mrs. He tried to reach for me.
But I hated being touched by any of them.
I hated that they insisted on being around me.
I hated their self-righteous attempts to ‘save’ me.
Whenever I saw them, I thought of my brother.
I thought of my brother lying there, cold and lifeless.
I started having insomnia.
When I was awake, my stomach would start to hurt again.
The medicine didn’t help.
I felt like I was going crazy.
Suddenly, I heard the sound of a key turning.
I looked toward the door.
The door opened, and Fu Ziyi walked in.
He seemed not to notice the mess on the floor, and asked casually, “Didn’t you say we’d go out for dinner tonight? Let’s go.”
Instinctively, I grabbed the corner of his shirt.
He took my hand and pried my fingers open one by one: “Wait, let’s take care of your wound first.”
I opened my hand to reveal a bleeding wound.
But something else was dripping onto my wrist, drop by drop.
This time it wasn’t a nosebleed – it was clear: tears.
“Why are you crying?”
Fu Ziyi reached out to wipe my face.
But my tears wouldn’t stop.
I hugged Fu Ziyi, resting my head on his shoulder, crying and shouting, “I hate them, I hate them. Can you make them leave?”
Fu Ziyi stroked my head. He didn’t say yes or no.
He just turned to look at them, his gaze turning icy cold.