Chapter 34
The night before my wedding, my father called me over. His voice was heavy as he said, “You’ve always been unruly, eccentric, and fickle since you were a child. Now you’ve brought such trouble upon us. You’re not a virgin-if Prince An finds out, you won’t be able to keep your place in Prince An’s Mansion. If word gets out, our whole family’s reputation will be ruined.”
He seemed almost unable to say it, and after a long pause, he finally asked, “Do you have any plan for tomorrow?”
I knelt on the ground and kowtowed twice, my face expressionless. “Don’t trouble yourself. You never cared about me before, and there’s no need to start now. Whether I live or die from now on, you needn’t worry about me.”
“You-” My father was furious, slamming the table and shouting, “So your wings have hardened, and now I can’t control you, is that it?”
“Don’t be ridiculous. When have you ever controlled me? If you had taught me, guided me, how could I have turned out like this? You’ve ignored me for so many years that I’m used to it. After tomorrow, please just pretend you never had a daughter like me.”
I left my father’s courtyard, carrying a paper lantern as I walked through the chilly late autumn night. Watching the lantern’s dim, blurry light, my vision grew hazy as well.
When I was young, I longed desperately for his affection. But after all these years, I’m no longer a child, and I’ve learned to let go of many things.
Giving me life alone does not make him worthy of being called a father.
Among common folk, when a daughter marries, her mother always tucks some bedroom manuals into the bottom of her dowry chest.
I placed the Jinling Bedchamber Arts at the bottom of my dowry chest as part of the dowry, considering it a token of completeness.
On the twelfth day of the tenth month, dressed in my wedding robes, I walked out of my small courtyard. I took one last look at the place where I had lived for seventeen years, and without a trace of nostalgia, I put on my bridal veil.
My father, Eldest Wife, Zhang Zhaoheng, and Zhang Jincan were all present.
Facing this family, not a single tear fell from my eyes.
Yin Jiuyi reached out his hand to me, and I placed mine in his.
The sky was clear and bright that day. Wearing a phoenix coronet and red wedding robes, I married him.
Though there was no grand wedding procession stretching for miles, in deference to the rules for Prince An’s Side Consort, there were sixty-four sedan chairs.
A breeze lifted the corner of my veil. Out of the corner of my eye, I glimpsed the plaque reading “Zhang Residence.” I tugged the veil lower, shutting myself off from all the festive joy around me.