Chapter 28
When I slowly regained consciousness, Yin Jiuqing was staring at me with a complicated expression.
My hazy mind snapped back in an instant. I sat up abruptly, eager to ask about the child, but in my rush I couldn’t catch my breath and coughed out a string of words with difficulty: “Where is my child? Is my child alright?”
“Zhang Qiuhe, do you think you can hide something this big forever?” Yin Jiuqing shot me a fierce glare, his tone sharp and severe. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
I frantically reached for Yin Jiuqing’s sleeve, choking back tears as I asked again, “Crown Prince Brother, is he still here?”
He kept a wooden expression and said nothing, brushing my hand away with a snap. But from his look, it seemed he tacitly acknowledged it.
Seeing him like this, I finally breathed a sigh of relief and touched my belly.
“Crown Prince Brother,” I nervously reached for his hand again, stammering, “I want this child. He’s my only family. Can you let me keep him? I truly want him, I’m begging you. If you don’t want to acknowledge him, I won’t marry you. I can leave the Capital with the child, anything is fine. That way you won’t have any stain, and it’s better for both of us.”
“Zhang Qiuhe, so this is what you really think.” He pushed me away, laughing at himself. “Of course, you’ve only ever used me. When have you ever been sincere?”
“I’m not, I…” I wanted to defend myself, but the words in my mind all felt so weak.
He stood up, his tone indifferent, neither sad nor happy: “For now, no one can know. Let me think.”
Barefoot, I got out of bed and hugged him tightly despite his resistance, piling on a flattering smile: “Crown Prince Brother, I’ll wait for you to think. You’ll surely find a way.”
He pushed me away and left without looking back.
I dazedly touched my belly and murmured to myself, not sure if I was comforting the child or myself: “Little one, don’t be afraid. Your father is just not good with words. It’s not that he doesn’t want you. He just… he just needs to think. You’re just like your mother, tough as nails. Don’t be scared, you must grow up well.”
After that, I kept dreaming. I dreamed of a little girl in a pink dress giving me a lotus flower. The delicate little girl giggled at me, calling me “Mother” in a soft, sweet voice.
I murmured the unfamiliar syllables to myself, “Mother, Mother…”
Even though it was a dream, I felt real happiness. The little girl threw herself into my arms, reaching out to me and acting spoiled: “Mother, hug me.”
Oh heavens, my heart was melting.
I thought it was a sign from above, that Yin Jiuqing would agree to let me keep the child. Even if he sent me somewhere else, my child and I would be fine. Later, I realized it was just daydreams turning into dreams at night-I was hoping too much.
Every day, I waited for news from Yin Jiuqing, but he never came to see me again.